Family and Society – Page 23 – Sugar And Spice… Among Other Things

Daily, Family and Society, Life, Personal Musings, Quotes, Stories Around the World, Work

Navigate From Within

Posted on July 8, 2019March 31, 2019 by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“Life is like a game of cards. The hand you are dealt is determinism; the way you play it is free will.” Jawaharlal Nehru

One of the advantages of chance meetings with old friends, colleagues or neighbours when one has time on their hands, is the quick catch up session followed by exchange of news as well contact details. In that short time, information is passed about common acquaintances who have moved on, made changes or are still there. For those who have done better, we often compare ourselves to them. For those who have done worse, we acknowledge that their life has taken a different turn and at times, blame fate. What we almost always fail to realize is that, commenting about others progress (whether one wants to or not) never really makes a difference, for each holds their own destiny in their hand.

“Lots of folks confuse bad management with destiny.” Kin Hubbard

Source:https://vk.com/comeshome

Destiny, has been one of the concepts that man prefers to fall back on, when things never go the way planned. Post any setback, the reactions range from blame those around one to the sequence of events, circumstances and so on and so forth; everything but the person alone. The drawback of such a cycle, is that, once started it is difficult to break it. Moreover, the tendency to always indulge in the cycle of acts persists.

“Everywhere man blames nature and fate, yet his fate is mostly but the echo of his character and passions, his mistakes and weaknesses.” Democritus

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Another way that man deals with setbacks is to hire “services” that offer to point out the right time as per mathematical, astrological, zodiac or other elemental methods of calculation. Little does one realize, that plans, setbacks, success and failure all lies within one person, their reaction to sequence of events in relation to their plans, dreams and hopes in life. Destiny, success, hard work, plans, hope and achievement all starts within. One decides wisely for oneself; knowing their own limitations, merits and lapses.

“The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

Source:https://vk.com/comeshome

To face destiny and achieve success requires one to introspective, willing to learn and observe from own as well as others’ lives. By blinding the eyes of the mind, the path taken will always be wrought with weeds of trouble, failures and uncertainties. To stay strong, one has to believe that they can navigate, as long as one knows how, where and what to look for. Man always has the discernment to make plans and tune destiny to work in one’s favour, provided one always believes in themselves, knows oneself with flaws, strength and all.

“If we would see the color of our future, we must look for it in our present; if we would gaze on the star of our destiny, we must look for it in our hearts.”
Canon Farra

Source:https://vk.com/comeshome

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The Warrior’s Destiny

A great Japanese warrior named Nobunaga was going to war with a fierce enemy with only one-tenth the number of men the opposition commanded. He knew that he could win the fight with a well planned strategy, but his soldiers were in doubt. On the way the leader stopped at a Shinto shrine and told his men: “After my visit to the shrine I will toss a coin. If the head comes, we will win; if tails, we will lose. Destiny holds us in her hand.” Nobunaga entered the shrine and offered his prayers. Then he came forth and tossed a coin in front of his men. Heads appeared. The soldiers were filled with confident and were eager to win the battle.
“No one can change the hand of destiny,” one of his attendants told him after the battle.
“Indeed not,” said Nobunaga and showed the coin which was doubled with heads on the both side.

“ Destiny is not a matter of chance, it is a matter of choice; it is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved.” William Jennings Bryan

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Christian, Daily, Family and Society, Life, Reflections

When in a Quandary

Posted on July 7, 2019April 20, 2019 by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

Flights cancelled due to bad weather. Consequently connecting flights lost. Whether refunded or not, the planned visit, trip, seminar or conference mayn’t work with plans delayed, changed or cancelled.

Daycare and school cancelled owing to unforeseeable circumstances. Grandparents out of town. No leave available. Working from home for both parents aren’t an option. Adjustments and decisions need to made quickly so that children aren’t left alone during office hours.

Stuck in a traffic block and getting late for an appointment, all this happening even though one had started off early.

Traffic diversions. Routes re-routed. Unprecedented road chaos. Job insecurities. Health affected. Promotion with long distance transfer. Lost employment opportunities. Loans and bills overdue.

During all the above scenarios and many more that may have a similar resonance to the above situations; evoking the same feelings of sudden disappointment, fear of the unknown, acute helplessness at the situation and disturbance of the routine or the expected; the words of the psalmist echoes in my mind, ” I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help. My help cometh from the Lord, which made heaven and earth.” (Psalms 121:1-2)

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Each of us, have our own share of problems and difficulties, maybe known only to us; while others perceive a rosy picture. Yet God above, who has created us, knowing every hair on our head (Luke 12:7) will never forsake us. Troubles will always come, in one form or the other; but tackling them, for any Christian, requires immense Faith and Trust that His Grace will always be with us. While on one hand, we do put our complete Faith in the Lord; on the other hand He demands us to still put our efforts and deal with the situations as best as we can (1 Timothy 5:8). When we allow God to work in our lives through Faith, it is by His Will that plans go, though at the same time, we continue our life and work by His Principle and His Teachings as the Scriptures have and still are teaching us.

For the practising Christian, there are innumerable places where when things have gone out of hand, sudden unexpected help had changed the scene or after a series of what may mean as “lost opportunities”, blessings in a more better manner with more feasibility or rewards were received, bringing peace and happiness within. When the balance tilts, the most important thing is to keep the Faith and go on giving one’s best shot, no matter what may come. God will always help is His Time, by His Will as per as His Plans, especially when Faith, Courage and Trust never waivers.

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Psalm 121
1 I lift up my eyes to the mountains—
where does my help come from?
2 My help comes from the Lord,
the Maker of heaven and earth.

3 He will not let your foot slip—
he who watches over you will not slumber;
4 indeed, he who watches over Israel
will neither slumber nor sleep.

5 The Lord watches over you—
the Lord is your shade at your right hand;
6 the sun will not harm you by day,
nor the moon by night.

7 The Lord will keep you from all harm—
he will watch over your life;
8 the Lord will watch over your coming and going
both now and forevermore.

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Daily, Family and Society, Life, Personal Musings, poetry, Quotes

Power of the “Little Things”

Posted on July 5, 2019April 6, 2019 by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“Success in life is founded upon attention to the small things rather than to the large things; to the every day things nearest to us rather than to the things that are remote and uncommon.” Booker T. Washington

Of the many attributes that binds man, family, friends, community and neighbourhood in general, is the art of paying attention. Simply put, the secret of happiness, love, respect and kindness have a common subset of “attention”.

“Give whatever you are doing and whoever you are with the gift of your attention.” Jim Rohn

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Excellence at work or the chosen field, lies in the art of doing it well and as per the targets or goals set. All this would be void without due attention being paid to each and every aspect.

Time spent for family and children can be sought only when attention is paid to what may seem trifle things, but can make the daily grind seem lighter. For instance, putting the breakfast dishes in the sink, putting toys on the play corner only, soiled clothes in the cloth basket (not on the floor) may seem trivial, but when done properly echoes to the other person that one does care.

Patiently listening to a colleague’s woes. Forgotten calls replied when possible. Due help given whenever possible, especially when requested. Being around for hospital visits with parents, as they grow old. Though these may seem trivial at that moment; for the other person it means big.

“Attention is vitality. It connects you with others. It makes you eager. Stay eager.” Susan Sontag

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As far as family, friends and loved ones go; actions do speak louder than words. The essence of love, respect and kindness isn’t reflected in the big things, but the small things of life, that really matter the most. To seek happiness of home, family, friends or community is in the individual minutes of small, quickly forgettable pleasures of a hugs, smiles, kind look, heartfelt compliment and countless small, but kind thoughts and sincere feelings, all arising when one pays due attention to those who around them. Love, kindness, joy and peace also need their daily bread.

“I love you” in the family vocabulary.
Sounds in other kind words:
“I will hang the linen myself on the balcony”,
“Let’s go on a holiday to the dacha to mother”.

“Cool, dress warmly”,
“Let the angels lead you everywhere”,
“Didn’t work out this time? Come on bolder!”,
“Get some sleep, I will wash the dishes in a flash”.

We sometimes do not notice much, The
most important thing is not grasping the essence,
With honeyed tea served in bed,
“I love” and the native people say.

Inna Kucherova (Translated to English)

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Daily, Family and Society, Life, Quotes, Reflections, Stories Around the World, Work

Leave the Perch

Posted on July 4, 2019March 31, 2019 by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“We cannot become what we want to be by remaining what we are.”- Max DePree

Holidays or long weekend breaks are not just a break from work to relax, but serve as a platform to engage with family, friends and neighbours. In the process of “engagement”, one always learns something new. With children, it’s often a tussle of learning to play the game or sport of the time, get theatrically busy with home productions or simply explore the outdoors with them, the nature’s way. An impromptu gathering of neighbours, friends or family brings “the experimental chef” mode back on, brushing up on the music, instrument or dancing skills among others. Time off from the daily schedule of work, involves indulging in the bucket list or wish list ranging from new hobbies, adventure sports or seeing new places.

“Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.” Neale Donald Walsch

SourcE:https://vk.com/monahos

The underlying common essence of holidays is to step beyond the regular zone and try something new. We all need our own zones to be comfortable, sane and happy. Our zones should be like a second skin, protecting us as well as helping us to remain happy. Yet when the zones become too familiar, mundane or deteriorating into a rut; it’s time to get moving and re-frame the environment, mind and oneself.

“Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.” Dale Carnegie

SourcE:https://vk.com/slideshowarts

Life is like a big canvas. The picture we paint can’t be done by staying in one frame for so long. When the branch one is perched, obscures the view ; then it’s time to leave it and fly to another. Flitting around will never get us anywhere, but staying on one perch will neither be of any use. Attempting to invest time, discipline, self effort and will to improve oneself will benefit the lives that we lead, to be one of enrichment than mediocrity. Dream right to fly and step out of the “comfort zones” that one is often shackled to, by free will and choice. There’s a big world out there to live, experience and see; and time always has a mind of it’s own.

“The best piece of advice someone has ever given me was ‘do it scared.’ And no matter if you’re scared, just go ahead and do it anyway because you might as well do it scared, so it will get done and you will feel so much better if you step out of your comfort zone.” Sherri Shepherd

SourcE:https://vk.com/comeshome

The Falcon and the Branch

Once a king received two magnificent peregrine falcons as a gift from one of his vassal state. They were the most beautiful birds he has ever seen. Though the Falcons were still quite young at the time, they were beautiful specimens groomed for keeping in his court specifically. The king called the head falconer and handed the two beautiful birds to be trained. The falconer trained the birds for months. But one day the falconer informed the king that one of the falcons was flying and soaring high in the sky while the other has not moved from its branch since the day it had arrived.
“I’ve never come across a bird as stubborn as this before,” the trainer complained to the king. He went on to describe how the creature ignored, refused and stubbornly lashed out at his every attempt. “May be there is something wrong with this bird. It just won’t fly.”said the trainer. The falconer was one of the best in the land, his talents widely lauded by all who knew him. So, the king decided to give the trainer some more time to make the bird fly. Months passed but the falcon never moved from the branch. The kings summoned all healers, sorcerers and other trainers from all the land to make the falcon fly. But none of them succeeded and the bird did not move from its perch.

One day a farmer was passing by the palace and heard about the stubborn falcon who wouldn’t fly. He thought he would give a try to make the bird fly. Having tried everything else, the king was desperate to make the bird fly, so he allowed the farmer attempt to make the bird fly. The next morning while the king was thrilled to see the two magnificent birds soaring high in the sky from his balcony. The king did not witness the feat himself, so he had the farmer brought before him to answer to his questions.

“I would like to know your secret,” the King said. “Tell me, how did you, achieve what the most highly trained, intuitive and wise men could not? How did you make the falcon fly?”
The farmer peered up from beneath his brow. “It was actually quite simple, your highness. I just cut the branch on which the bird was perched.”

We all are made to fly. But at times we we sit on to our branches, clinging to the things familiar to us and never attempting for a change. The possibilities in the world are endless, but most of it remains undiscovered because we never attempt to go beyond our comfort zone. We conform to the familiar, the comfortable, and the mundane. We need to go outside of our comfort zone, destroy the branch of fear we cling to and free ourselves to the glory of flight!

“Be willing to step outside your comfort zone once in a while; take the risks in life that seem worth taking. The ride might not be as predictable if you’d just planted your feet and stayed put, but it will be a heck of a lot more interesting.” Edward Whitacre, Jr.

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Christian, Family and Society, Life, Personal Musings, Quotes, Reflections

Words for “Tomorrow”

Posted on July 3, 2019March 29, 2019 by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“There are only two lasting bequests we can hope to give our children. One of these is roots, the other, wings.” Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

For every newborn that is born, there are numerous hopes and dreams as well as love radiating in their parents’ eyes. Each newborn has their own story behind them. While some enter a loving home from birth; few others face a home of “differences” and some even face tragedy or misfortune from the cradle on. Yet for every child or newborn; there is a prayer and wishes running in the mind of the adults that they meet, from parents to guardians as well as grandparents, relatives, neighbourhood, community and society on the whole.

“Children are not casual guests in our home. They have been loaned to us temporarily for the purpose of loving them and instilling a foundation of values on which their future lives will be built.” James Dobson

Source:https://vk.com/comeshome

Children are the roots of the society. Without them, the very root of the social and adult existence holds no meaning once when their own time runs out. For every child of the future, boy or girl; certain pertinent lessons are learnt directly or incidentally so as to brave the future society and world on the whole.

“When you hold your baby in your arms the first time, and you think of all the things you can say and do to influence him, it’s a tremendous responsibility. What you do with him can influence not only him, but everyone he meets and not for a day or a month or a year but for time and eternity.” Rose Kennedy

Earnestly hope for every young mind to master any craft, art or any undertaking that they love, regardless of their position, background or education received; so that their own hands can always feed, cloth and shelter them.

Hope that every young mind will see at least a little world in order to stop regretting their own land, understand that since the time of the fall everything is about the same as well as know that “the grass is not always greener on the other side”. What matters more is what one does with that grass or land; water to let the “green prosper” or let it stand still to wither from the elements of time, weather and season, without care or nurture.

“Each day of our lives we make deposits in the memory banks of our children.” Charles R. Swindoll

Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts

Patiently learn to endure and combat physical as well as mental pain; learning to handle it and temper them such that they are dealt with in the right manner; trying in the process to not inflict the same or as little as possible to cause pain for others.

Foresee that money though a necessity of life, doesn’t bring happiness and peace along with it, if it is made the central part of lives. Money has it’s worth as long as one can use it for harmony, peace and spread kindness through it, not for the lone purpose of one’s own selfish interests or betterment. Money when shared right an just, increases it’s value more, both as materialistic realities as well as mental happiness and peace of mind. The more attached we become to money, the more collared one becomes.

“Let parents bequeath to their children not riches, but the spirit of reverence.” Plato

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Keep family and fellow beings as the highest priority. Happiness lives within and is encompassed of the simple things of life. The roots lie in the strong sense of love, respect, understanding and kindness that one holds for the other. Family, community and society is a network interlocked with the other and self. When one “standing block” stumbles, it will fall on the rest to hold it up so that the roots and the foundation can be set up again. Elements of nature and time will always weather one down; but when the lattice stays strong, the mind flourishes and the land prospers. For the grid to be strong, every element matters, including own and immediate others.

Hold deep respect for knowledge, sacrifice, history as well as forefathers of the past. On arrival at any prosperous event in life, to remember with grace, dignity and respect of the sacrifices, teachings as well as advice of the elders of generations past and senior. Whether they be better or worse than us during their times or even if they have lived their ways and days different, learning to be silent and listen does a lot of personal good for now and later. Listening with respect and learn to accept and regard advice wisely. While some may have been there readily, others have imperceptibly and subtly influenced the course of events.

“To be a good father and mother requires that the parents defer many of their own needs and desires in favor of the needs of their children. As a consequence of this sacrifice, conscientious parents develop a nobility of character and learn to put into practice the selfless truths taught by the Savior Himself.” James E. Faust

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Most importantly and above all, hold true to the Faith, beliefs and ideals as per His Word. Doing right is and has always been as well as will be difficult. Wrong is wrong and sin is sin, no matter the way we project, clothe or explain it. True faith is never light. It involves a lot of self effort, introspection as well as humility to work towards one’s betterment and follow the right ideals of life. Diligence, loyalty, respect, love, faith, kindness, humility and generosity are few of the fruits of the Spirit which form a part of the core fulcrum to live one’s life to the fullest.

“Educate your children to self-control, to the habit of holding passion and prejudice and evil tendencies subject to an upright and reasoning will, and you have done much to abolish misery from their future and crimes from society.” Benjamin Franklin

Every parent, guardian and elder wishes that these were few of the lessons that children learned in life; so that they grow to lead independent, wise and life rich in worthiness, fullness and remain happy. Although one underlying fact stays strong and true;what one knows one will impart. Unless as adults, we learn to do the same; how can children be taught to do better. For every child to do well; as adults, guardians, parents and society as a whole should strive to improve each day in the right way, manner and principles that Faith, Time and Life teaches us again and again.

“It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men.” Frederick Douglass.

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Daily, Family and Society, Life, Personal Musings, poetry, Quotes

Effect of a Smile

Posted on July 1, 2019June 23, 2019 by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“I love those who can smile in trouble, who can gather strength from distress, and grow brave by reflection. ‘Tis the business of little minds to shrink, but they whose heart is firm, and whose conscience approves their conduct, will pursue their principles unto death. ” Leonardo da Vinci

After work , one longs to put their feet up, shift the day’s tune and just delve into a different frame of the mind. In a home with kids and family, doing so may be little difficult. Very often, when stepping into the house or picking up kids from their different activities, one longs for some quiet. Yet a child’s smile changes everything and puts the mood into a different beat and rhythm. On seeing the smile of a toddler, one is reminded of the little joys and happiness in life as well as how precious that little action is. A smile indeed can change the world.

“Nobody needs a smile so much as the one who has none to give. So get used to smiling heart-warming smiles, and you will spread sunshine in a sometimes dreary world.” Lawrence G. Lovasik

Source:https://vk.com/monahos

A difficult day. Smile and the mood shifts, solutions crop up and the stress fades.

When facing mental hurdles. Smile and hand over the stress into His Hands.

Plagued by worry, doubt, insecurities and impatience. Smile to let go and embrace the present, facing each day by the hour, minute and seconds as they come by. Smile, lift up the inner spirit, stay strong and strive.

“Children show me in their playful smiles the divine in everyone. This simple goodness shines straight from their hearts and only asks to be loved.” Michael Jackson

The only rule to follow when one smiles; is to smile from the heart, honest, sincere and warm. Smile with hidden intent, plastic kind or while harbouring ill, does more harm to the “doer” than the receiver. Smile like a child from within to stay happy, calm and at peace.

Source:https://vk.com/veruj

The Smile

There is a Smile of Love
And there is a Smile of Deceit
And there is a Smile of Smiles
In which these two Smiles meet

And there is a Frown of Hate
And there is a Frown of disdain
And there is a Frown of Frowns
Which you strive to forget in vain

For it sticks in the Hearts deep Core
And it sticks in the deep Back bone
And no Smile that ever was smild
But only one Smile alone

That betwixt the Cradle & Grave
It only once Smild can be
But when it once is Smild
Theres an end to all Misery

– William Blake

Source:https://vk.com/veruj

“I’m a firm believer in smiles. I used to believe that everything had to be a belly laugh. But I’ve come to realize that a real sincere smile is mighty powerful.” Roy Clark

Christian, Daily, Family and Society, Life, Stories Around the World

Of Request and Trust

Posted on June 30, 2019June 23, 2019 by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” ( Phillipians 4:6)

From the very early years of childhood, the concept of prayer has been taught, explained and seen. Through the Scriptures, prayer has been a form of request, supplication, thanksgiving, forgiveness, help and many more. Prayer is the way in which one puts their complete trust and faith in His Love, His Guidance, His Mercy as well as ask for His Hands to be over us at all times.

“But you, Lord, do not be far from me. You are my strength; come quickly to help me.” (Psalm 22:19)

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Yet man being man, the innate nature of trying to control every outcome to his own plan and purpose, little realizing or often forgetting that we ourselves are a part of His Plan. In fact, our lives are such that whichever way we go or whatever purpose or aim we try to reach, unless it is governed by His Will, all attempts or successes are in vain and in the long run, come to naught.

“I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being.” (Ephesians 3:16)

While man tries to define everything by rational thinking, controlling of the causes and nurture by evidence based principles, put on the armour of reasoning, facts, logic and proved theories; not all things happen by those clauses. Many a time, one is forced to revise the “proved” of find a reason to define the change. In stead, when one learns to combine these facts, logic and realism with faith in the His Will, one eventually realizes that good things do happen at His right time. Doing so, in the long run, the final outcome may be beyond our wildest expectations. One needs to work and pray, doing their own share of effort, burning one’s own energy and sweat for their purpose or aims in life; but always request in prayer to let our will be in accordance with His Will and His Purpose. When one starts putting this ideology in practice, one discovers that this path will be difficult. For to live by the principles of both Faith and Trust is never easy; yet the final fruit goes beyond one’s own imagination.

“It is God who arms me with strength and keeps my way secure.” (Psalms 18:32)

Source:https://vk.com/monahos

One monk planted an olive tree and began to pray: “Lord, send rain to my tree.” And the Lord sent rain upon the earth. The tree was saturated with moisture, and the monk continued to pray: “And now, Lord, I ask you to send a lot of sunshine – my tree needs warmth.” And the Lord sent the sun. The tree grew. The monk continued to pray for him: “Lord, send a little frost to strengthen the roots and branches.” The Lord sent a frost and …. the tree died. The monk was very upset. He went to another monk to tell his story and share sorrow.

“I also have an olive tree, look,” another monk replied. His tree has grown beautifully. “But I prayed differently. I told God that He is the Creator of this tree and knows better what is needed for him. I just asked God to take care of him.”
This also applies to us. We often ask for what we think we need. But only the Lord knows what we need. Trust Him completely!
– Rus Svyataya

“If anyone speaks, they should do so as one who speaks the very words of God. If anyone serves, they should do so with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen.” ( 1 Peter 4:11)

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