Stories Around the World – Page 34 – Sugar And Spice… Among Other Things

Life, Reflections, Stories Around the World

Fill the Cup

Posted on December 6, 2018October 22, 2018 by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

Nan-in, a Japanese master during the Meiji era, received a university professor who came to inquire about Zen. Nan-in served tea. He poured his visitor’s cup full, and then kept on pouring. The professor watched the overflow until he no longer could restrain himself. “It is overfull. No more will go in!” Like this cup, Nan-in said, you are full of your own opinions and speculations. How can I show you Zen unless you first empty your cup?

Although there are many versions of the above story, the common thread running through all of them is that a full cup can’t hold anything more. While most of us may think it doesn’t apply to us, the reality may be the opposite. Do we hold any mental framework of how things should happen ? Do we use our knowledge to define guidelines for others without viewing the entire situation ? Many a time we dealt with situations and events based on what we already know or what we assume is right, without listening and learning to see what is actually happening.

To quote Nyogen Senzaki,”Like this cup, you are full of your own opinions and speculations. How can I show you wisdom unless you first empty your cup?” When we interact with people across the walks of our life, the reality of being educated arises. Illiteracy today is not just limited to the inability to read and write, but also encompasses the inability to keep a fresh mind in each situation.

In the beginner’s mind there are many possibilities, in the expert’s there are few. – Shunryu Suzuki-roshi

As we grow in life we improvise and learn a lot, always staying as beginners mayn’t be possible. Keeping a mind open to learning will help us improve our level of understanding of the various gifts of life. For keeping the same liquid or brew in a single place makes it stagnant and tasteless in the long run. The beauty lies when the liquid flows or when a cup is refilled with something refreshing, may it be new or old.

We are cups, constantly and quietly being filled. The trick is, knowing how to tip ourselves over and let the beautiful stuff out. Ray Bradbury

In the world of today, real progress is made when we learn when to unlearn what we thought we knew and when to learn anew about the things we didn’t know or assumed. While knowledge is to learn and fill our minds with something new, wisdom is what or when we know to learn, let go what we thought we knew or when to throw the light of what we have learnt to others.

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Family and Society, Life, Photography Art, Stories Around the World

Danger of Anger

Posted on November 30, 2018October 16, 2018 by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

One of the most powerful emotions of man that can have very severe consequences is anger. As time and history has even proven, anger not only causes mayhem but also mass destruction with deadening consequences. What we never realize that the anger is more deadly for the person who carries than it perpetually than one who tries to vent it. To quote Baptist Beacon, “ Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.”

As an old English proverb goes,“Anger is often more hurtful than the injury that caused it.” An anger stewed on can grow stronger generating resentment and hatred along with it and eventually fixes itself onto the mind, body and soul echoing in the thoughts, actions and even dreams. Finally it gets fueled by displeasure ultimately swelling and bursting into flames which become irreconcilable and irreversible. When we look back, we wonder what was the need for all of it. “If you kick a stone in anger you will hurt your foot. Korean saying”

As Apostle Paul had taught in Ephesians 4:26,””In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry.” For carrying this burden is tiresome and lonely. With every hour we fuel the anger, we lose twice the precious time of our peace. While certain occasions may feel like anger is justified, it doesn’t bring any solution just creates a negative impact. As William Arthur Ward had said, “It is wise to direct your anger towards problems — not people; to focus your energies on answers — not excuses.”

Hoarding and storing up the anger is like handling a bag of mouldy and stale potatoes. Not only is it irksome, but it also wastes space in the cellar but also spreads the mould and rot to the other edible items. “If you are patient in one moment of anger, you will escape a hundred days of sorrow. Chinese Proverb”

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A Bag of Potatoes

The student asked the teacher: “You are so wise. You are always in a good mood, you never get angry. Help me to be like that.” The teacher agreed and asked the student to bring potatoes and a transparent bag. “If you get angry at someone and harbor a grudge,” said the teacher, “then take this potato.” On one side write your name, on the other the name of the person with whom the conflict occurred, and put this potato in the bag. – And it’s all? – puzzled asked student. “No,” answered the teacher. You should always carry this bag with you. And every time when someone is offended, add potatoes to it. The student agreed … Some time passed. The student pack was replenished with several more potatoes and became quite heavy. It was always very uncomfortable to carry around. In addition, the potato that he put at the very beginning began to deteriorate. It was covered with slippery bloom, some sprouted, some flowered and began to produce a sharp unpleasant smell. The student came to the teacher and said: – It is already impossible to carry with you. Firstly, the bag is too heavy, and secondly, the potatoes spoiled. Offer something else.

But the teacher said: – The same thing happens in your soul. When you are angry with someone, you are offended, then a heavy stone appears in your soul. You just do not immediately notice. Then the stones become more and more. Acts become habits, habits – in character, which gives rise to fetid vices. And it is very easy to forget about this cargo, because it is too heavy to carry it with you all the time. I gave you the opportunity to observe the whole process from the outside. Every time you decide to be offended or, on the contrary, offend someone, think whether you need this stone. Our vices are generated by ourselves. Do you need to carry a bag of spoiled potatoes behind your back?

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Daily, Family and Society, Stories Around the World, Work

Scarred by Words

Posted on November 26, 2018November 26, 2018 by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

The pen is mightier than the sword or vice-versa as some believe. This ongoing tussle between the pen and sword has been going on for quite some time. Yet there is something that we fail to realize that has an ever bigger presence. Words and Actions, but more importantly words. Words have the potency to cause more harm as it inflects a change on both the listener as well as the speaker. It would be an understatement to mention that many times “we speak before we think, instead of think before we speak.”

“The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks.” Luke 6:45

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Many words that we say are a result of our erroneous tongue and less thinking. Some of us shrug it off and say it was in the heat of the moment or that one didn’t mean it so. While the rest of us may apologize or pretend to forget. Unfortunately, once the words have been said, they linger in the subconscious mind and strike the hardest when we least expect it. Eventually the same words can lead to regrettable actions and irreversible consequences. Although it is true that we should express ourselves honest, take heed to not to say anything in the heat of emotion of either anger, sorrow or excessive joy. For we never know the extent of harm these words can cause or when the same words may bite us back. Once damaged, the dent will stay no matter how minor it may seem.

“Be mindful when it comes to your words. A string of some that don’t mean much to you, may stick with someone else for a lifetime.” -Rachel Wolchin

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Nails on The Fence

Once there was one very quick-tempered and unrestrained young man. Then one day his father gave him a bag of nails and punished, whenever he did not contain his anger, to drive one nail into the fence post. On the first day there were several dozen nails in the pole. The other week, he learned to restrain his anger, and every day the number of nails driven into the pole began to decrease. The young man realized that it was easier to control his temperament than to drive nails. Finally, the day came when he never lost his temper. He told this to his father, and he said that this time every day, when his son can control himself, he can pull a nail out of the pole. As time went on, the day came when he could tell his father that not a single nail was left in the pole. Then the father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence: – You did quite well, but do you see how many holes are in the pole? He will never be the same. When you say something evil to a person, he has the same scar as these holes. No matter how many times you apologize after that, the scar will remain.

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Christian, Stories Around the World

Face of Love

Posted on November 25, 2018October 16, 2018 by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

Today’s title is based on D. Michele Perry‘s book. She is the founder of Iris,South Sudan; an orphanage where she had devoted her life to change the world. She is an unusual missionary as she was born without a left kidney, hip and leg, yet many consider her to be one of the most joyful people on earth. I had read about her works when a friend of mine had tagged me along with an excerpt from her book in my social network pages. As I read through the article, numerous emotions ran through my mind which reminded me of the love that our Lord has given us. This excerpt is from her book “Love Has a Face: Mascara, a Machete and One Woman’s Miraculous Journey with Jesus in Sudan”.

The story of Ani (not her real name, changed) was a miracle that happened literally in the mud. Through this little girl I understood God’s grace and compassion more than through anyone in my life. Anya came to us at the age of three and a half with two brothers. She was the shadow of a little girl. She did not want to play. She did not allow anyone to touch her. She always looked for the dirtiest and unclean places in the camp. Finding such a place, she lay down in the mud and cried there for hours. If someone tried to lift her, she was twisted and torn again to this place. Most of the moms have already stopped pulling her and just left to lie on the ground and cry. Her roar was especially unpleasant. I wondered how often before, when she cried in the same way, no one heard her or came to her. It had an imprint of the orphan spirit. She was sure that no one loved her and no one wanted her, and to prove it to herself, she made it difficult, as far as possible, for us. “Dad, what to do? How can I love her? “Immediately, an excerpt from Philippians 2 came to me:“For you must have the same feelings as in Christ Jesus: He, being in the image of God, did not esteem the plunder to be equal to God; but he humbled himself, taking the form of a slave, becoming like men, and in appearance becoming like a man” (verses 5–7) Jesus came to where I was. Therefore, I had to go where Anya was. So I did.

I found her lying in the mud and lay down beside her. I did not touch her and did not speak. I did not look at her because I knew that it would only make her scream louder. I just lay down next to her. She knew that I was there. I was just there. The next day I lay down next to her in the same way, but this time I put my hand in front of her eyes. It seemed that nothing was happening. Not accepting disappointment, I tried again. The next time I again found her lying and stretched out my hand. This time her little hand approached mine. Slowly, we joined hands, only to make this scene repeat again and again over the next weeks. Slowly, almost imperceptibly, a miracle occurred in the heart of Ani. She became aware that she was loved and safe and desirable. She deserves to be in the mud for her. She deserves to look foolish for her. She deserves love. She is not alone and not abandoned. Her crying no longer remains unheard in silence.

I will never forget when I saw Anya smile for the first time. Tears flowed out of me, without stopping. Now she is five, and she smiles a lot. She wraps herself in my hem and loves to help younger kids. She plays and laughs and loves to hug. Anya is no longer an orphan. She came home. Traveling with her taught me about the wealth of the Father’s grace. He did not tell me to get out of the mud of my own pain and shame. He did not tell me to get rid of it, and then only to come to Him. Not. He lay in the mud with me. He offered His hand and just waited – letting me see, letting me believe, letting me put my hand in His and then stand together. I understand Anya. The only difference in us is that her pain was visible, and mine was hidden in my heart. God’s love is great. He comes and seeks us in the muddy places of our deepest wounds and dark corners. He loves us so much that he moves the heavens and the earth to show us His great grace. He loves us so much that he hugs us even when we are in the mud. And He loves us so much that He does not leave us there.

Michelle Perry “Love Has a Face”

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Daily, Quotes, Reflections, Stories Around the World

What Goes A Long Way

Posted on November 23, 2018October 14, 2018 by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“Respect for ourselves guides our morals, respect for others guides our manners. Laurence Sterne”

Respect. Courtesy. Consideration. Manners.

What maybe a simple “Good morning” or “Hello” from our side may have made someone else’s day or even changed their perspective when they were in the dark. Yet that innocent and courteous greeting can go a long way, helping us when we least expect it. While respect mayn’t always be necessary to be returned in kind there and then; it can brighten the day both for us and for the addressee. No matter how busy the day might be or how close the deadlines are looming and how hectic the schedule may be, always take the time to treat others with due regard and courtesy.

“We learned about gratitude and humility – that so many people had a hand in our success, from the teachers who inspired us to the janitors who kept our school clean… and we were taught to value everyone’s contribution and treat everyone with respect. Michelle Obama”

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This is a story that I had read through my social media pages which struck a chord. Although I don’t know if it’s true, the message conveyed is worth the effort and time to browse through it.

The woman worked at the meat factory. One day, at the end of her working day, she went into the freezer to check something, but the door accidentally closed – and the woman was locked from the inside.
The woman screamed and knocked with all her might — it was all to no avail — no one could hear her. Most of the workers have already left, and outside the freezer it is impossible to hear what is happening inside. Five hours later, when death seemed inevitable, the factory guard opened the door — and the woman miraculously escaped that day from death. Later, the woman asked the guard why he decided to check the freezer that day, because it was not his responsibility. The guard replied: “I have been working at this factory for 35 years, hundreds of people come and leave every day, but you are one of the few who greeted me in the morning and said goodbye at the end of the working day. Many relate to me, as if I am invisible … Today, passing by me, you, as always, told me “Hello”. But after work, I noted with curiosity that I did not hear your “so long, see you tomorrow,” and I did not see you leaving the factory’s territory. So I decided to check around the factory. I’m so used to your “hello” and “bye” every day, because they remind me that I need someone. Not hearing your farewell today, I realized that something had happened. That is why I have been looking for you everywhere. ”

Be humble, love and respect those around you. After all, we never know what will happen tomorrow.

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Daily, Family and Society, Reflections, Stories Around the World

Passbook Worth Fighting For

Posted on November 21, 2018October 14, 2018 by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

A WEDDING GIFT

She married him today. At the end of the wedding party, her mother gave her a newly opened bank savings passbook, with $1000 deposited in it. She told her, “My dear daughter, take this passbook. Keep it as a record of your married life. Whenever something happy and memorable happens in your new life, put some money in. Write down what it’s about next to the amount. The more memorable the event is, the more money you can put in. I’ve done the first one for you today. Do the others with your husband. When you look back after many years, you will know how much happiness you’ve both shared.’

She shared this with him after getting home. Both of them thought it was a great idea and couldn’t wait to make the next deposit. This is what the passbook looked like after a while: 7 Feb: $100, his first birthday celebration after marriage
1 Mar: $300, she gets a salary raise
20 Mar: $200, vacation
15 Apr: $2000, She’s pregnant!
1 Jun: $1000, He gets the big promotion and so on…However, as the years went by, they began fighting and arguing over trivial things. They didn’t talk much. They regretted that they had married the most nasty person in the world. There was no more love. One day she talked to her Mother. ‘Mom, we can’t stand it anymore. We have decided to divorce. I can’t imagine how I decided to marry this guy!’
Her mother replied, ‘Sure, that’s no big deal. Just do whatever you want, if you really can’t stand it. But before that, do one thing remember the savings passbook I gave you on your wedding day? Take out all money and spend it first. You shouldn’t keep any record of such a poor marriage.’ She agreed with her mother. So she went to the bank, and was waiting in the queue to cancel the account.

While she was waiting, she took a look at the passbook record. She looked, and looked, and looked. Then the memory of all the previous joyful moments came back to her. Her eyes were filled with tears. She left and went home. When she got home, she handed the passbook to her hubby and asked him to spend the money before getting divorced. So the next day, he went to the bank, and was waiting in the queue to cancel the account. While he was waiting, he took a look at the passbook record. He looked, and looked, and looked. Then the memory of all the previous joyful moments came back to him. His eyes were filled with tears. He left and went home. He gave the passbook back to her. She found a new deposit of $5000. And a line next to the record: ‘This is the day I realized how much I’ve loved you throughout all these years. How much happiness you’ve brought me.’ They hugged and cried, putting the passbook back into the safe.

Marriage is never a game, as there are no winners or losers. It is neither easy nor does it follow a strict code of unbending rules. Yet it is beautiful for the fact that two people live for each other with gentle understanding and kind love. As no two people will come from the same background or follow the exact same path from same homes, neither will one person think as a clone of the other, fights and arguments are inevitable. Even though we have our set of beliefs, opinion and requirements, it doesn’t give us the right to impose on the other under the pretext of being married. Both have to express their own ideas and air out opinions with both compromising to reach a mutually acceptable solution. For along with the shared interests, morals and love; it is the mutual respect and acceptance that binds us together and carry forward during the tough times as well as misunderstandings. Before we throw in the towel, give up and declare it over, think back to the good times and to what brought us together in the first place. If the knowledge and times are worth living again, the fight to save. If not and the distress outweighs the reasons and the love shared in the initial days, then finally close the chapters with mutual respect and start anew.

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Daily, Reflections, Stories Around the World

Reality of the Gingerbread Man

Posted on November 20, 2018October 20, 2018 by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

Ever since my toddler had got his own storybook about “The Gingerbread Man”, he has been fascinated by the large cookie that can run. Little wonder then that he chose to read this book more than thrice a day at different sittings.

The story centers around an old woman who baked a gingerbread man which leapt from her oven and runs away. The woman and her husband give chase but are unable to catch him. The Gingerbread Man then outruns several farm workers and farm animals while taunting them, only to fall prey to the fox. The tale ends with the latter catching and devouring the gingerbread man.

Although he is too young to understand the hidden concepts, sometimes I do wonder if this tale is an underhand way to get at adults for our possessive streak, trust issues as well as the habitual lying we either weave ourselves or get caught in.

Just as every person or animal runs after the gingerbread claiming it,the question arises if the person has a right to claim it. We often reinforce it to children that just because we want it, doesn’t mean that it is ours or that we can have it. Isn’t true for adults too where our whims and tendencies trigger the possessive streak many a time. Second is the trust issue. Like the spider and the fly, we often fall prey to trickery as we see want we want to see or hear what we want to interpret. Though for the innocent children it is more important to know who to trust an when to call for help; this lesson doesn’t change as we become adults. The world is an ocean, filled with delights and sharks. To experience the former, one has to steer clear of the latter. The third is about the lies. Black or grey or white, lies are lies and fibs are fibs. While sometimes we engage them with good intentions, the dangers of being caught makes one uneasy at any point of time. For a man without credibility and honesty is like an unreliable car or gadget.

Setting aside the story, there is something special about gingerbread, either shaped as a doll, cookies or even the houses. One chunk at a time, they not only add colour to the flavours but also add to fun times in the kitchen with delicious batter to sample.