Work – Page 15 – Sugar And Spice… Among Other Things

Daily, Family and Society, Life, Personal Musings, Work

Caught and Crabbed

Posted on January 30, 2019November 16, 2018 by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

The highest treason a crab can commit is to make a leap for the rim of the bucket. Steven Pressfield

On any visit to the fish market, the bucket of crabs is always a given availability in the mornings. An interesting phenomenon is noticed when all crabs are put together in a bucket. When one of them tries to get out of the bucket, others pull him back. Sometimes crabs show their anger especially when they drag their kinsman at the last moment, when he has almost reached the edge of the bucket. This pattern of behaviour noted in crabs results in the efforts of any one crab’s escape being undermined by the others, ensuring the group’s collective demise.

“You cannot strengthen one by weakening another; and you cannot add to the stature of a dwarf by cutting off the leg of a giant.” Benjamin Franklin Fairless

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Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts

We may have come across this phenomenon among our fellow beings, known as “Crab mentality” or “crabs in a bucket (also barrel, basket or pot)” is typical of selfish, myopic thinking which is best described by the phrase “if I can not, then you can not”. The analogy in human behaviour or the way of thinking is when members of a group will attempt to reduce the self-confidence of any member to halt their progress especially those who accomplish anything beyond the others. The root trigger of this behaviour stems out of envy, resentment, spite, conspiracy, or competitive feelings.

“Like those crabs which dress themselves with seaweed, we wear belief and custom.” Cyril Connolly

Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts

We rarely realize how many situations we have come across with peers behaving like crabs or we being one at times. There are many simple examples to highlight how easy is to be one with a crab mentality in our daily life. When a person tries to turn over a new leaf like quit smoking or control the alcohol intake limit; then friends say “it will not work anyway,” signals crab mentality. When you get a second degree and colleagues loudly wonder, exclaim and question why you need it because you already have a job highlights crab mentality again. While starting something new like an art, learning a new skill we often hear rash words of being stupid, wrong timing, nothing good will come of it; at times they all echo the pulling down behavior of the crabs.

This is human nature, and nothing can be done about it, except for one thing – to be stronger than a bucket and crawl forward, even when a hundred people are pulling you back.

Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts

Daily, Family and Society, Quotes, Work

Measure of Intelligence

Posted on January 23, 2019November 14, 2018 by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

Being innate hunters and gatherers for the purpose of survival, man doesn’t limit this action to his physical existence alone, but also to enhance his mental, emotional and spiritual thirst for life. From the very beginning, the questions of why, how, when, where and why has always fascinated man. To this purpose, the development of “intelligentia or intellectus” began from a purely scholarly view point to betterment of one’s existence. Fast forwarding to the present day, on the purpose of enhancing one’s intelligence; education, travel as well as acquiring information has been on the achievements list.

The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time, and still retain the ability to function. F. Scott Fitzgerald

In fact, many consider an intelligent person is one who reads a lot, received a good education, travelled a lot, knows several languages and bears a lot of facts, data or information. While all this is partly correct, one can have all yet lose sight of humanity. In other words, we can have all the prerequisites of being intelligent and be unintelligent. On the contrary, we can’t have any of the requirements and still be an internally intelligent person.

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Character is higher than intellect. A great soul will be strong to live as well as think. Ralph Waldo Emerson

For along the way we have lost sight of the real purpose of “intelligence”. The latter which in turn stems from the verb “intelligere” means to comprehend or perceive. Today both comprehension and perceptions are lost in the acquisition of intelligence.

Intelligence lies is not only in displaying knowledge, but also in the ability to understand others. It manifests itself in a thousand and a thousand trifles: in the ability to argue respectfully, behave modestly at the table, quietly (imperceptibly) help others, not to drop litter around themselves, not to utter hurtful or bad words or rude ideas.

Intelligence is the ability to understand, to perceive, it is a tolerant attitude towards the world and towards people. Dmitry Sergeevich Likhachev

So this begs the final question of whether we are intelligent enough to change for better and before things go from bad to worse. Or should we cling to what our beliefs and ideals were once formed on, even if they are humanely incorrect, egotistic and narrow minded to the point of stifling our relationships with fellow beings and curbing our growth, happiness and inner peace.

Intelligence is the ability to adapt to change. Stephen Hawking

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Life, Reflections, Stories Around the World, Work

Building the House

Posted on January 3, 2019November 16, 2018 by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

There was a foreman. All his life he built houses, but he became old and decided to retire. “I quit,” he told the employer. “I am retiring. I will be with my old woman with grandchildren to nurse. His boss was sorry to part with this man, and he asked him: ” Listen, let’s do it, build the last house and we will retire. With a good premium!” The foreman agreed. According to the new project, he had to build a house for a small family, and it began: coordination, search for materials, testing. The foreman was in a hurry because he had already seen himself in retirement. If he didn’t finish something, he simplified it, bought cheap materials, as they could be delivered faster. He felt that he was not doing his best work, but he justified himself by saying that this was the end of his career. Upon completion of construction, he called the owner who inspected the house and said, ” Now this is your house! Take the keys and move in. All documents are already completed. This is a gift from the company for many years of work.” What the foreman experienced was known only to him alone! He was standing red with shame, while everyone around them clapped their hands, congratulated him on his new home and thought that he was blushing with shyness, and he was blushing with shame for his own carelessness. He was aware that all the mistakes and shortcomings were now his problems, and everyone around him thought that he was embarrassed by an expensive gift. And now he had to live in the only house that he built poorly.
Today we are building a house in which we will move in tomorrow. And how your house will be depends only on you.

Like the foreman, we all are involved in our businesses, work, neighbourhood and various other activities that set off a chain reaction. When we don’t resolve to put our heart into our work, actions and words; considering that the outcome will not affect, we would have never been more wrong in our estimation and forecast.

Everything we do matters. Going about our lives as we see fit, if not right may dearly cost us. Whether with passion or disinterest; with desire to excel or with carelessness; with effort or a lazy attitude, in the end what goes around comes around.

We are all in the process of constructing something in life. When we are not happy with what we see or the consequences of what we have been building over the years, its’ time to change before it becomes too late. Time never waits but when it gives us an opportunity for corrective measures, grab it with both hands before that too is taken out of the picture.

Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts

Daily, Family and Society, Stories Around the World, Work

When the Geese Fly

Posted on December 27, 2018October 26, 2018 by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“Teamwork begins by building trust. And the only way to do that is to overcome our need for invulnerability.” – Patrick Lencioni

In this season, as the year comes to an end; each one of us may be busy with our own projects, either related to home, or being on holiday mode as a group or family, neighbourhood or community gatherings especially those of Christmas and New Year as well as school celebrations, plays, parties and the like. Amidst all this, we are involved with a team of people with us being either at or near the apex or as a part of the body. In all these events we are being a part of the bigger crowd or leading one. To have a good time, not just in teamwork but enjoying our work as well, it would do us good to emulate the geese.

“Teamwork is the ability to work together toward a common vision. The ability to direct individual accomplishments toward organizational objectives. It is the fuel that allows common people to attain uncommon results.” – Andrew Carnegie

The geese teach us their lesson of teamwork with both the members as well as the leader fulfilling their roles. When we acquire a bit of their sense, we will realize we can achieve much better and save more time, effort and energy. Above all, by using the sense of a goose, we will discover than any project or task can be fun and enjoyable.

“If I have seen further, it is by standing on the shoulders of giants.” – Isaac Newton

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A sense of a goose

Next Autumn, when you see geese heading south for the winter, flying in a “V” formation, you might consider what science has discovered as to why they fly that way. As each bird flaps its wings, it creates an uplift for the bird immediately following. By flying in a “V” formation, the whole flock adds at least 71 percent greater flying range than if each bird flew on its own. People who share a common direction and sense of community can get where they are going more quickly and easily, because they are travelling on the thrust of one another.

When a goose falls out of formation, it suddenly feels the drag and resistance of trying to go it alone and quickly gets back into formation to take advantage of the lifting power of the bird in front. If we have the sense of a goose, we will stay in formation with those people who are heading the same way we are.

When the head goose gets tired, it rotates back in the wing and another goose flies point. It is sensible to take turns doing demanding jobs, whether with people or with geese flying south.

Geese honk from behind to encourage those up front to keep up their speed. What message do we give when we honk from behind?

Finally – and this is important – when a goose gets sick or is wounded by gunshot, and falls out of the formation, two other geese fall out with that goose and follow it down to lend help and protection. They stay with the fallen goose until it is able to fly or until it dies; and only then do they launch out on their own, or with another formation to catch up with their own group. If we have the sense of a goose, we will stand by each other like that.

Photo by GEORGE DESIPRIS on Pexels.com

Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts

Daily, Family and Society, Stories Around the World, Work

Scarred by Words

Posted on November 26, 2018November 26, 2018 by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

The pen is mightier than the sword or vice-versa as some believe. This ongoing tussle between the pen and sword has been going on for quite some time. Yet there is something that we fail to realize that has an ever bigger presence. Words and Actions, but more importantly words. Words have the potency to cause more harm as it inflects a change on both the listener as well as the speaker. It would be an understatement to mention that many times “we speak before we think, instead of think before we speak.”

“The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks.” Luke 6:45

Source:https://vk.com/public75290000

Many words that we say are a result of our erroneous tongue and less thinking. Some of us shrug it off and say it was in the heat of the moment or that one didn’t mean it so. While the rest of us may apologize or pretend to forget. Unfortunately, once the words have been said, they linger in the subconscious mind and strike the hardest when we least expect it. Eventually the same words can lead to regrettable actions and irreversible consequences. Although it is true that we should express ourselves honest, take heed to not to say anything in the heat of emotion of either anger, sorrow or excessive joy. For we never know the extent of harm these words can cause or when the same words may bite us back. Once damaged, the dent will stay no matter how minor it may seem.

“Be mindful when it comes to your words. A string of some that don’t mean much to you, may stick with someone else for a lifetime.” -Rachel Wolchin

Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts

Nails on The Fence

Once there was one very quick-tempered and unrestrained young man. Then one day his father gave him a bag of nails and punished, whenever he did not contain his anger, to drive one nail into the fence post. On the first day there were several dozen nails in the pole. The other week, he learned to restrain his anger, and every day the number of nails driven into the pole began to decrease. The young man realized that it was easier to control his temperament than to drive nails. Finally, the day came when he never lost his temper. He told this to his father, and he said that this time every day, when his son can control himself, he can pull a nail out of the pole. As time went on, the day came when he could tell his father that not a single nail was left in the pole. Then the father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence: – You did quite well, but do you see how many holes are in the pole? He will never be the same. When you say something evil to a person, he has the same scar as these holes. No matter how many times you apologize after that, the scar will remain.

Source:https://vk.com/public75290000

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Christian, Life, Personal Musings, Work

Perception of Being Free

Posted on October 13, 2018September 26, 2018 by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

In the course of the history, one of the concepts which has been largely studied is the concept of freedom. Through time, there has been different dimensions and contexts to freedom. Essentially in philosophical terms, freedom is associated with free will balanced by moral responsibility, not constrained by any undue or unjust means. Yet the term “free will” can be advocated as freedom of thought innate to the human mind engaged at that particular point of time. Yet to the most reasonable person, freedom doesn’t essentially mean to do whatever one wants. Freedom also stands for securing to everyone an equal chance at life and pursuit of happiness.

In reality, there are two concepts to freedom. While negative freedom is about being free of any interference or constraints; positive freedom is being free to self-actualize or being free from internal constraints. It is important to comprehend the distinction between both as they often need to strike a very delicate balance. Through experience we realize that undue disruption and loss of positive momentum can be caused if freedom is misused.

Although the christian freedom is on similar lines, strongly bordering on the sense of moral and social responsibility; it also urges to do good on the widest scale possible with the intent to build up the church and the Word of God. In simple terms, if a man has his heart on the salvation, it make a big impact to regulate his conduct in context of the world. Although there may not be any specific laws or rules to follow in the code of his attire, his entertainments, his work or style of living; if the underlying manner of life is contrary to doing good to glorify The Word of God, then to him that particular manner or behavior is improper. Such a concept of freedom is a better guideline to direct life in this world than would be exact minute positive statutes to regulate everything.

If we go through the verses from 1 Corinthians 10:23-24, “23 “I have the right to do anything,” you say—but not everything is beneficial. “I have the right to do anything”—but not everything is constructive. 24 No one should seek their own good, but the good of others.”

While the original context of the verse was with respect to the limits of Christian Freedom with the way of life, written in the letter to the Corinthians; the underlying message is that the Christian way is not to simply exercise one’s rights. Instead the freedom we attain through Christ should be used to help others and not hurt or bring down the morale of others. However, it doesn’t imply that man is not in any instance to disregard his own welfare, happiness, or salvation nor that man owes no regard or duty to himself or family. Neither does it allow man to neglect his responsibility both to family and himself to advance the welfare of others. It implies that when no direct law or guidelines are laid down, our actions should be governed by the Word of God to show the salvation to others and not to behave for one’s ease or comfort. For on taking care of our fellow beings, the actions we do should bring glory to God’s name. We’ll be able to enjoy the true sense of Christian freedom when we use it not only for our sake, but as an example for cues of conduct to others.

On the other hand, we may not be able to please everyone. Being a doormat is difficult, for by trying to please everyone, we please nobody. However that doesn’t mean to do something we have to impose our decisions or changes on others. It is a very delicate balance to strike between true freedom as well as getting the work done. The Golden Rule which holds true then and even now is,”Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” This is a simple rule which can be easily put into practice. It can aid as a balance-wheel in the various actions and plans of our lives. If everyone would adopt this rule, there would be less danger of going wrong and ensure that our lives on this earth would not be in vain.

Source: https://vk.com/public75290000

Source: https://vk.com/slideshowarts

Source: https://vk.com/public75290000

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Family and Society, Reflections, Stories Around the World, Work

Plant the Worry Tree

Posted on October 3, 2018October 2, 2018 by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

In the present day, almost everyone holds a job. For instance, in a family of four, many a time both the husband and wife may be employed (or sometimes just the husband) or teenagers would be working part-time in order to contribute to their college fund. Even stay-at-home mothers have enough and more on their plate. Which or how ever may be the scenario or the reason, most of us hold jobs for certain hours everyday, after which we each return to our respective homes, either back to our families or shared quarters. The pressing question is how many of us bring our work with it’s own share of problems, back to our home ?

If we honestly answer, it would be an affirmative reply for many of us. Some of us may bring back our physical or actual work, others may bring back the problems and the mental as well as emotional difficulties faced that day, back with them while others may bring back both. Either way we lose out in our time at home with the family or our relaxation time for a whole load of stress again. The worst part is that we get up the next day to start the whole cycle of “work-stress-work” again. For those of us who work in the areas that we like or have a keen interest in may disagree with the stress, by saying that work for them was never stressful. However, the fact is by bringing the work with or without the problems home; we are losing “family time” or “me-time” to recoup.

In my early days of college, there was a story told in one of my lectures, which I would like to share.

The carpenter who was hired to help a man restore an old farmhouse had just finished his first day on the job and everything that could possibly go wrong went wrong. First of all, on his way to work he had a flat tire that cost him an hour’s worth of pay, then his electric saw broke, and after work his old pickup truck refused to start. His new boss volunteered to give him a lift home and the whole way to his house the carpenter sat in stone silence as he stared out his window. Yet on arriving, he invited his boss in for a few minutes to meet his family. As they walked toward the front door, he paused briefly at a small tree, touching the tips of the branches with both hands. When he opened the door, he underwent an amazing transformation. His tanned face was one big smile as he hugged his two small children and kissed his wife.

Afterwards, the man walked his boss to his car to say thank you. Now on their way out of the house, the boss’ curiosity got the best of him so he had to ask the man about the tree on the front porch. He said, I noticed when you came up on the porch before going into your house you stopped and touched the tree, why? “Oh, that’s my trouble tree,” he replied. “I know I can’t stop from having troubles out on the job, but one thing’s for sure – my troubles don’t belong in the house with my wife and children. So I just hang them up on the tree every night when I come home. Then in the morning I pick them up again.” “Funny thing is,” he smiled, “when I come out in the morning to pick ‘em up, they aren’t nearly as many as I remember hanging up the night before.”

We all have encountered our own share of troubles and struggles, some of us deal with it by bringing them with wherever we go, some might ignore it hoping it would go away somehow while others try to deal with their problems while their heads are still above water. The idea of hanging the problems on a “worry tree” or a ‘‘trouble tree” outside the door isn’t a bad one, in fact we can find our own modifications on dealing with the stresses. I have been successful in dealing with my own share of problems and worries by laying them down at the feet of the Lord. “Cast your cares on the LORD and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken. (Psalm 55:22)”