Posted in Daily, Reflections, Stories Around the World, Work

Merge the Angles

“An ant can’t define shape of an elephant solely from its’ point of view. They have to unify all views. It’s a way for ant to understand elephant. In order to understand true realities, men need to do mental blending.” Toba Beta

Prior to starting off another major project, there was the brain-storming session in the office. As the ideas got exchanged, details considered and outcomes were contemplated; there were open disagreements on whether the said plan would work out. Although the fist fight had never happened, the flurried exchange of words was close to a verbal war. Eventually the project details were finalized and set in motion, though the entire discourse reminded one of the importance of bringing the different viewpoints together to bring a consensus to the decision.

“The most fatal illusion is the settled point of view. Since life is growth and motion, a fixed point of view kills anybody who has one.” Brooks Atkinson

Starting from elementary school, there would have been many similar scenarios wherein a squabble breaks out on who is right. The hard part is when both arguing parties are right but not in entirety. That is when reaching the middle ground is important. Finding a consensus and appreciating the other viewpoint teaches one that each person has their different set of experiences. These differences tracks help to bring out the common goal when different views are contemplated and merged together with the understanding that each perspective is important in its own right. As the different notes get harmonized, only then the play can be set to music. Life is never made of a single angle or plane, but an amalgam of varied panorama, angles and slants. Unless viewed as a whole, each of us may miss out on the compete picture.

“We don’t get harmony when everybody sings the same note. Only notes that are different can harmonize. The same is true with people.” Steve Goodier

When I was in elementary school, I got into a major argument with a boy in my class. I have forgotten what the argument was about, but I have never forgotten the lesson I learned that day. I was convinced that “I” was right and “he” was wrong – and he was just as convinced that “I” was wrong and “he” was right. The teacher decided to teach us a very important lesson.
She brought us up to the front of the class and placed him on one side of her desk and me on the other. In the middle of her desk was a large, round object. I could clearly see that it was black. She asked the boy what color the object was. “White,” he answered. I couldn’t believe he said the object was white, when it was obviously black! Another argument started between my classmate and me, this time about the color of the object. The teacher told me to go stand where the boy was standing and told him to come stand where I had been. We changed places, and now she asked me what the color of the object was. I had to answer, “White.”
It was an object with two differently colored sides, and from his viewpoint it was white. Only from my side it was black.
Sometimes we need to look at the problem from the other person’s view in order to truly understand his/her perspective.
Author Unknown
(Source:vk.com)

Posted in Daily, Family and Society, Personal Musings, poetry, Quotes, Reflections, Work

Strain of the Indisposition

On the days when the work schedule drags, the events then on tend to go on in a discordant manner. Eventually on reaching home, with the usual things not done like dinner late, homework hours not supervised and the like; the entire mood sours down and the evenings end on an unhappy or dissatisfied note. While journalling such days and reading them later on, at times it’s how one learns to behave when things go beyond the expectation (especially when in a negative manner) that makes the biggest difference in the long run.

“The greatest joys of life are happy memories. Your job is to create as many of them as possible.” Brian Tracy

Emotional infection is a deadly thing. A chain effect triggered by it can have far reaching consequences; avoidable, unnecessary with a significant negative impact, spoiling relationships and makes the daily hours unpleasant, of discontent as well as unhappy. As the scales of the balance go awry, the urge to initiate the “blame game” and point fingers start soon, as compared to making efforts to try and reschedule to get back on track. Guarantee for everything or anything never exists in reality. There is always a chance of a miss or an error present even in the best laid plans, schedules or goals. When one lets their emotions fly unchecked, the consequences can go deadly and far reaching, be it on the professional, personal or domestic front. To keep the inner peace best within, learning how to handle the unexpected is necessary skill. Though this may take time and plenty of effort, they are all worth when the impact is taken into account. For words and memories have a far lasting effect, than targets or achievements as scored on paper.

“I am convinced that the greatest legacy we can leave our children are happy memories: those precious moments so much like pebbles on the beach that are plucked from the white sand and placed in tiny boxes that lay undisturbed on tall shelves until one day they spill out and time repeats itself, with joy and sweet sadness, in the child now an adult.” Og Mandino

No matter how many precautionary measures one may take; when things go haywire, take a quick breathe and continue on. The art of learning to manage any curve-ball lies in the way we behave to these sudden turns. Instead of fretting and getting dejected on the “why me, why now” aspect, settling and finding effective be it temporary or permanent solutions may help make the days (or evenings) end better. More than achievements, goals or occasions, what stays etched in the mind are “feelings”. The feeling of calm and happiness in the children as their parents return from work, the approach that another person feels or learns as the crisis period is sorted and the cumulative efforts taken to settle any environment are just few of the better emotional memories that linger and stay on as the years pass through.

“I’d like the memory of me
to be a happy one.
I’d like to leave an afterglow
of smiles when life is done.
I’d like to leave an echo
whispering softly down the ways,
Of happy times and laughing times
and bright and sunny days.
I’d like the tears of those who grieve,
to dry before the sun
of happy memories
that I leave when life is done.”
Helen Lowrie Marshall

Posted in Family and Society, Personal Musings, Quotes, Random Thoughts, Work

Trace Not These Steps

Interacting with peers on the neighbourhood level, workplace to society on the whole, one walks through various situations. From the good-natured ribbing to snide remarks, comments are always being passed around, whether one wants to actively join in it or happens in own presence; inevitably it happens. In such moments, getting affected is easy. Among all those remarks, taking some in the true sense and few with a pinch of salt or just let them float above the mind helps.

“Keep on the sunny side.” Ada Blenkhorn

To keep the mind sane and thoughts happen, a lot of just walking away helps. To pass a remark in defense to company who really wants to pull one down, doesn’t really help. Instead time gets wasted in sorting out blurry thoughts all the time, some of which in hindsight, one realizes isn’t really worth it. To keep the thoughts in one’s right mind, one needs to learn when to leave or abstain from joining in purposeless and meaningless thoughts. Once we learn to walk away from the taunts and comments, one learns to embrace the challenges as they come, keeping the mind of reasonable thoughts, sane, happy, clam and at peace with a will to put the inner best forward.

“A lot of walking away will do your life good.
Walk away from arguments that lead you to anger and nowhere.
Walk away from people who deliberately put you down.
Walk away from the practice of pleasing people who choose to never see your worth. Walk away from any thought that undermines your peace of mind.
Walk away from judgmental people, they do not know the struggle you are facing and what you have been through. All away from your mistakes and fear, they do not determine your fate.
The more you walk away from things that poison your soul, the healthier your life will be.”
Dodinsky

Posted in Daily, Life, Quotes, Reflections, Work

The “Nailing” Point

Diz ſagent uns die wîſen, ein nagel behalt ein îſen, ein îſen ein ros, ein ros ein man, ein man ein burc, der ſtrîten kan.
– (c. 1230 Freidank Bescheidenheit)
(Middle High German (positively formulated):”The wise tell us that a nail keeps a shoe, a shoe a horse, a horse a man, a man a castle, that can fight.”)

With a hoard of activities being planned for Christmas, little wonder then that unless prioritization is done, no task will reach their finish point. In hindsight, one realizes that despite the prioritization, necessary things are left undone. Which highlights, what may be necessary mayn’t be important then but pays a heavy price later on.

The trip to the family roots, attending the recital, cheering at the junior league match, quick rush to the doctors’ for the routine physical checks, following the prescribed or set medication, servicing the four wheeler on time, drawing the building plans with an eye on the future possibilities are all just few of the many instances wherein “what is necessary to be done” is foregone for “the mood of that time”, botched up planning or deeming the “necessary as trivial”.

Over time, one goes through many situations wherein the failure to contemplate the various possibilities or correct the then perceived as minor defects, may eventually lead to a more grave sequence of events with appalling outcome. The root problems lies in the indifference to what is the necessity than what is simply the other important task at that point of time. True that availability and possibility for the necessary task may seem slight then, but that balance of scales is always a relative concept. At times, when the fingers are burnt, the consequence will then be felt as terrible and priceless.

“Neglect breeds mischief…” Benjamin Franklin

Hindsight is indeed unsettling, for once these chains of defaults and causalities are tended to, going back to the normal way may be difficult. But as they always say turning to the right path at some point may be better than going on the same, reparative steps have to be taken as soon as the errors have been realized. For a stitch in time o save nine, knowing that the “stitch” is necessary isn’t just enough but getting down and doing it is more important. No matter how small they may seem, it is the simple things that matter quite a bit. And these are the few, but pertinent facts that one discerns as the years mature.

For want of a nail, the shoe was lost,
For want of a shoe, the horse was lost,
For want of a horse, the rider was lost,
For want of a rider, the message was lost,
For want of a message, the battle was lost,
For want of a battle, the war was lost,
For want of a war, the kingdom was lost,
For want of a nail, the world was lost
‘The Want of a Nail”
– T. Rundgren
Warner Chappell N.A., Ltd., 1989
(“Rundgren” Variation)

Posted in Life, Personal Musings, Quotes, Stories Around the World, Work

Alone or With A Leaf

“In the depth of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer.” Albert Camus

The absence of my toddler at the table for his allotted cartoon time, had sent me to the garden. With the rains and the winds still lashing on though in a minimal way, I was mentally prepared to see him in mud. Surprisingly, I found him by the small pond (covered with a strapped wire mesh thankfully) with a little leaf complete with a long stalk in hand. On closer view, he was gently prodding two tortoises to reach their temporary home soon, before the night fall. While one with the help of the “leaf” had reached the pond soon; the other had almost managed on it’s own. With both of them safely in their home, the wide smile on the young face was worth the muddy shirt.

“Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try Again. Fail again. Fail better.” Samuel Beckett

All of us have our own moments, of being “the tortoise” or “the child”. Wherein, one may need the extra support to go ahead or one has been the provider of that extra support. On the other hand, there have been many who have been in the shoes of the tortoise without that help. Each step was taken with effort, not calculating or finding the prospects in the future; but going about the task and dealing with each aspect along the way.

“At the very moment when people underestimate you is when you can make a breakthrough.”? Germany Kent

Once one has crossed the finish line, on looking back, the feeling of awe, relief, happiness, contentment and thanksgiving all come rolled in one. Later as one dissects the situation, the realization comes that all things are possible, no matter how big it may seem; as long as we keep the self belief and start tackling it, no matter how small the step may seem to be. No sculpture is made one blow alone, but by series of continued chipping to create the many planes, inclinations, curves and angles for the final effect. Our lives reflect a lot similar. Help or no help, once we start moving, one reaches the end point sooner than just twiddling the thumbs or flapping around. Beauty in life as such, is experienced only after a wee little effort on own part.

“You may be the only person left who believes in you, but it’s enough. It takes just one star to pierce a universe of darkness. Never give up.” Richelle E. Goodrich

A Determined Spirit
Author Unknown

Once upon a time, a small bird named Tasoo lived in a vast jungle. One hot summer day, a terrible wildfire erupted and the flames devoured many trees and animals living in the jungle. Other birds flew high into the sky and far away to safety, but Tasoo couldn’t bear to leave her precious jungle home to burn. Day and night, she flew with all her might back and forth to the river, filling her tiny beak with water to drop on the raging fires. Tasoo’s rare heart of courage and unshakable determination moved the heavenly gods to shed tears, and a great rain poured down upon the jungle, extinguishing the flames. And so it is that even the smallest actions of a determined spirit can change the world.
(Popular parable of the Quechua (Incan) Indians of South America)

Posted in Daily, Life, Personal Musings, Quotes, Stories Around the World, Work

Beyond the Odds

Thomas Edison tried two thousand different materials in search of a filament for the light bulb. When none worked satisfactorily, his assistant complained, “All our work is in vain. We have learned nothing.” Edison replied very confidently, “Oh, we have come a long way and we have learned a lot. We know that there are two thousand elements which we cannot use to make a good light bulb.”

“You can steer yourself in any direction you choose.” Dr. Seuss

It wouldn’t be just the assistant of Edison alone felt defeated, but thousands of like minded innovators and entrepreneurs who would have had similar feelings during their line of work. While working out their dreams and designs, many a time the negativism felt would have to be replaced with practical optimism for things to succeed. What would have been the outcome if they were still stuck in the crypts of negativity ? While the obvious was that they may have lost out on their invention; the reality is that they may lost out on their dream.

“You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing which you think you cannot do.” Eleanor Roosevelt

Every experience has something to teach each one of us. Being human, one is bound to make mistakes, feel low during the time of repeated setbacks, open criticism and rejection. Coming out of those dumps is what makes the difference for each one of us. Life is all about growth and finding new shores. Find the realistic optimistic side of each failures or setback. Use them as stones to rebuild the dream and finally one would achieve it over the course of time.

“If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.” Henry David Thoreau

Posted in Daily, Family and Society, Personal Musings, poetry, Reflections, Work

Improvise and Lighten

“Keep love in your heart. A life without it is like a sunless garden when the flowers are dead. The consciousness of loving and being loved brings a warmth and a richness to life that nothing else can bring.” Oscar Wilde

As the late summer rains hit the early evening skies, the drive back from work got longer than usual, with the roads being slippery and visibility strained. Consequently the “train of late” followed. Late dinner, the bedtime of children delayed, house still in a mess and chores left undone. It takes all of one’s mental will to not scream but handle the situation to the best of their capacity. The entire mood can be made dark for not just one person but rest of the related people (here the family) when things go berserk. The anger of one person can be transferred to the rest, creating a negative ripple effect and impact the peace and happiness of the rest along the way. Or one can chose to make the best of the situation. Instead of putting the blame on anyone, it would be a thousand times better to find humour in the fiasco, ending the day on a better note and lighter mood.

“We do not remember days, we remember moments.” Cesare Pavese

Unknowingly (more than knowingly) one is making moments and memories by every minute. While at times, we may have the “good times” , others may be the “bad times”. Yet it is how one handles them that makes the difference year-round. Each negative thought or action that one has or does, influences the feelings, memory and actions of those around one especially children; if not immediately, then later over a period of time. When one masters the art of dealing the situation at hand, in a light or positive mood; then the emotions and memories transferred to the others would be positive, uplifting and an enriching experience for both the doer and the rest around them. All of us have it in us, to make the best of ourselves. Though it’s alright to rave and rant at the moment, buckle up and start doing their own best to make the situation better. Doing so, will not enrich our own treasure chest of memories but make memorable ones for later and for others.

“Life is a gift, and it offers us the privilege, opportunity, and responsibility to give something back by becoming more.” Tony Robbins

A glorious recipe for the soul
Fold two hands together,
And express a dash of sorrow;
Marinate it overnight,
And work on it tomorrow.

Chop one grudge in tiny pieces
Add several cups of love,
Dredge with a large-sized smile,
Mix in ingredients from above.

Dissolve the hate within you,
By doing a good deed;
Cut in and help your friend,
If he or she should be in need.

Stir in laughter, love and thankfulness,
From the heart it has to come;
Toss with genuine kindness, then
share with folks who may need some.

The amount of people served,
Will all depend on you …
This recipe can feed an entire world,
If you really want it to!

Author Unknown