attitude – Page 23 – Sugar And Spice… Among Other Things

Family and Society, Life, poetry, Quotes, Work

Time, Change and Addresses

Posted on May 16, 2019May 5, 2019 by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another.” Anatole France

Like all events that come to an eventual close, yesterday had marked the farewell of two colleagues at the workplace. While attending the meet, what came to mind was the fact that predictability and stability works only for a time. During my younger years, with both parents working, transfers and promotions went in hand with address change. Although as kids we had met many friends and been to many localities, there was always an underlying feeling in me that certain things can never be permanent or sure.

“People lose people, we lose things in our life as we’re constantly growing and changing. That’s what life is is change, and a lot of that is loss. It’s what you gain from that loss that makes life.” Thomas Jane

Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts

Change, development and growth go in tandem in life. People change, addresses change and routine alters, yet nature remains true to its’ unpredictability. As literature and history, unfolds the story of the great conqueror of their times, Alexander the Great, the truth that we come carrying nothing and we leave empty handed too holds true. But what we do leave behind, is the legacy of our work as footprints behind. Every man will disappear, but leaving those marks for the future to learn from them, is dependent on each individual alone. One always has the choice to change, either for the better or worse. The wiser we act, think and live; the happier, serene and at peace, we will be.

“Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.” Lao Tzu

Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts

Addresses Change

The people change addresses, move,
They part and leave and disappear,
And only an autumn grove
Is permanent, it will be here.
And only an autumn grove
Is permanent, it will be here.

What in the very end remains?
Not idle talks or strained relations, –
– A mowed field, the vast of plains,
A forest road to a train station.

The path by empty villas winds,
The homes of wealth, prestige, renown.
An old dray-cart left us behind –
A guy was driving to the town.

And this is what, for sure, stays:
The river, white in the night haze,
It is bewitched and charmed by mist,
Adorned by a camp-fire shimmer
And beacons twinkling in the midst –
All for the safety of shipping.

Gennady Shpalikov

“We know what we are, but know not what we may be.” William Shakespeare

Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts

Family and Society, Life, Quotes, Reflections, Stories Around the World, Work

Choices, Expectations and Opportunities

Posted on May 13, 2019May 5, 2019 by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“Applications are closed.”

The above sentence, seen across recruitment pages of websites, office circulars, school bulletins and so on; have caused numerous emotions, ranging from regret, anger, hopelessness, defeat, despair to feeling of unfairness, on the events that have taken place. Yet one constant reminder through all these circumstances is the irrevocable fact that time is always short and the windows or doors are left open only for a limited period of time.

“Opportunities are like sunrises. If you wait too long, you miss them.” William Arthur Ward

Source:https://vk.com/public75290000

Source: https://vk.com/pub_mdma

Source:https://vk.com/we_live_aSource:https://vk.com/public75290000

Reflecting back on missed chances, the reason for the delay when examined seem inconsequential then but significant now. From the excuses of lack of time, failure to read the notice, busy schedules, lack of planning and the like; all these when compared to the chances lost lead to severe regret and mental anguish for a time.

“Change can be frightening, and the temptation is often to resist it. But change almost always provides opportunities – to learn new things, to rethink tired processes, and to improve the way we work.” Klaus Schwab

As history has taught us, every one gets their fair share of opportunities, but unless we keep our eyes, ears and minds open with hearts and will brave, we will never have the option to use them. “Fortune does favour the bold.” Not because they were lucky, but they were willing to change to give a try. Contrarily always flitting around in search of greener pastures, would cause us to miss the fruit that the first garden bore. As nature always teaches us, everything happens in His time as long as we take the Chance when offered, instead of whiling away in self comfort and idleness. If one chance is missed, learn from it and don’t lose out on the next.

“A great attitude does much more than turn on the lights in our worlds; it seems to magically connect us to all sorts of serendipitous opportunities that were somehow absent before the change.” Earl Nightingale

Source:https://vk.com/englisharoundtheworld

The parable of “Not a Fulfilled Dream”

There lived a young man in the world. And he had a dream – to have a high-paying job, marry a beautiful woman and become famous throughout the world. Once in a frosty winter, a man was in a hurry for an interview at a well-known company.
Suddenly an elderly man fell right in front of him. The man looked at the fallen, the thought arose in his head that he was most likely drunk and did not give a hand. This helped not to be late for the scheduled meeting. But the interview was unsuccessful: the person was not taken to the desired position.
Somehow a man walked around the city on a summer evening. Noticing a troupe of street performers, he stopped to enjoy the spectacle. After the end of the action, applause rang out and people began to disperse. The young man also turned back, but someone timidly touched his shoulder. It was the main character of the play, the old woman-clown. She began to ask him about whether he liked the show, whether he was pleased with the actors. But the man did not want to lead the conversation and, disgustedly turned away, went home.
Once on a rainy evening, a man hurried home from a friend’s birthday. He was very tired, and thoughts of a fragrant bath and a cozy warm bed flashed through his head. Suddenly he heard someone muffled sobbing. This is a woman crying. She sat on a bench near the man’s house, without an umbrella. On noticing the young man, she turned to him for help. She had a family affliction. And she needed only a spiritual companion. The young man wondered, a bath and a bed appeared in front of his gaze, and he hurried into the porch.
This man had lived an unhappy life. And he died. Once in heaven, a man met his Guardian Angel. He said, “You know, I lived a very miserable and worthless life. I had three dreams, but nothing came true. It’s a pity.” “My friend,” the Guardian Angel replied, “I did everything to make all your dreams come true, but for this you only needed your hand, your eyes and your heart.”

– Do you remember a fallen man on a slippery winter road? I will now show you this picture … That person was the CEO of the company you wanted to get into. You waited dizzy career. All that is required of you is your hand.
– Do you remember the old clown who, after a street performance, came to you with questions? It was a young beauty actress who fell in love with you at first sight. You were waiting for a happy future, children, undying love. All that was required of you was your eyes.
– Do you remember the crying woman near your entrance? It was a rainy evening, and she was soaking wet from tears … It was a famous writer. She was experiencing a family crisis, and she really needed emotional support. If you helped her to warm up in her apartment, to warm herself with Soul thanks to your wise words of consolation, she would have written a book in which she would have told about this incident. The book would become known to the whole world, and you would become famous, because on the main page the author would indicate the name of the person who became the muse of this work. And all that was required of you then was your heart. You were inattentive, my friend.
The man sighed and walked along the lunar path into the star’s distance …
Listen to the world, it offers opportunities. One should not only ask for help, but also be able to accept the help and help others with dignity.

“To succeed, jump as quickly at opportunities as you do at conclusions.” Benjamin Franklin

Source:https://vk.com/englisharoundtheworld

Family and Society, Life, Reflections, Stories Around the World, Work

The Worth of Every Effort

Posted on May 8, 2019May 4, 2019 by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“Knowing trees, I understand the meaning of patience. Knowing grass, I can appreciate persistence.” Hal Borland

Entering into the work zone every morning, is like walking into a different time frame. From childhood we have been told to take pride in doing our work, be it simple household chores, completing homework or assignments on time, getting involved in school sports, drama or musicals, working for college scholarships, the university Christmas choir and the like. The focus was laid on doing well so as to bear fruit. As we grow older one realizes that not everything bears fruit with immediate effect. By working hard, there is guarantee that the task would bear fruit to be the selected or winning project; or despite all the hard work, sales target mayn’t be met or more clients , may be lost than gained. Yet the underlying benefit of enjoying and working to one’s maximum potential, is knowing that one has tried their respective best. That mental satisfaction is worth every penny of one’s sweat.

“Indeed, this life is a test. It is a test of many things – of our convictions and priorities, our faith and our faithfulness, our patience and our resilience, and in the end, our ultimate desires.” Sheri L. Dew

Source:https://vk.com/public75290000

Source:https://vk.com/we_live_a

Each one of us have our own difficult scales to balance. From managing family and work, to taking care of aged parents, managing the kids, night classes to attain the additional professional degree, juggling two jobs to repay the loans; each one knows their own struggle. Being discouraged and disheartened despite all the efforts is human. In those moments, it’s alright to take a breather, regroup, refocus and find the inner muse to get going. For once one decides not to drop the gauntlet, staying true to the efforts with the inner drive pushing one on; the ultimate outcome would be heartening, beyond one’s wildest hopes and dreams.

“Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after the other.” Walter Elliot

Source:https://vk.com/we_live_a

Source:https://vk.com/public75290000

The Other Side of the Wall

There was a young woman who took great pride in the growth and care of the flowers in her flower garden. She had been raised by her grandmother who taught her to love and care for flowers as she herself had done. Like her grandmother, her flower garden was second to none. One day while looking through a flower catalog she often ordered from, a picture of a plant immediately caught her eye. She had never seen blooms on a flower like that before. “I have to have it,” she said to herself, and she immediately ordered it.
When it arrived, she already had a place prepared to plant it. She planted it at the base of a stone wall at the back of her yard. It grew vigorously, with beautiful green leaves all over it, but there were no blooms. Day after day she continued to cultivate it, water it, feed it, and she even talked to it attempting to coax it to bloom. But, it was to no avail.
One morning weeks later, as she stood before the vine, she contemplated how disappointed she was that her plant had not bloomed. She was giving considerable thought to cutting it down and planting something else in its place. It was at this point that her invalid neighbor, whose lot joined hers, called over to her. “Thank you so much! You can’t imagine how much I have enjoyed the blooms of that vine you planted.” The young woman walked through the gate into her neighbor’s yard, and sure enough, she saw that on the other side of the wall the vine was filled with blooms. There were indeed the most beautiful blooms she had ever seen. The vine had crept through the crevices and it had not flowered on her side of the fence, it had flowered luxuriantly on the other side.

Just because you cannot see the good result of your labour does not mean that it bore no fruit.
Author: Randy Reynolds

“Every great dream begins with a dreamer. Always remember, you have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world.” Harriet Tubman

Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts

Family and Society, Life, Personal Musings, Stories Around the World

“Doing Good”, From Within

Posted on May 1, 2019March 16, 2019 by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“How far that little candle throws his beams! So shines a good deed in a weary world.” William Shakespeare (The Merchant of Venice)

One of the feelings that man is silently on the look out for, is the feeling of being loved, recognized or appreciated. One tries seeking it many places, known or unknown to them. When one strives to do something good, kind or be generous by actions, words or thoughts; one secretly harbours the feeling and hope that these would be appreciated, whether those feelings come by knowingly or unknowingly.

“Know you not that a good man does nothing for appearance sake, but for the sake of having done right?” Epictetus

SourcE:https://vk.com/slideshowarts

What one often forgets is that, “doing good” doesn’t come with a tag that says “thank me” but with a hidden code that reveals how much comes from truly within. We can do good or be kind; because we want to or, just because we hope that some one would do it for us when we need it or, for some one of our own who may need it. Whatever the reason may be, unless we do “good” from deep within our hearts, all these would be in vain. For the real meaning of “doing good” would be lost, if it never began from within first.

“Be happy, noble heart, be blessed for all the good thou hast done and wilt do hereafter, and let my gratitude remain in obscurity like your good deeds.” Alexandre Dumas(The Count of Monte Cristo )

SourcE:https://vk.com/slideshowarts

One woman baked two tortillas every morning. One for family members, and the second, additional, for the casual passerby. The woman always put the second flat cake on a window sill, and any person passing by could take it. Every day, when a woman laid a cake on the windowsill, she offered a prayer for her son, who had left the house to look for a better life. For months, the mother knew nothing about her boy and always prayed for his safe return.

Soon she noticed that a hunchback came every day and took the second cake. But instead of the words of gratitude, he only muttered: “The evil that you do remains with you, and the good returns to you!” and went on his way. This went on day after day. Not receiving the expected words of gratitude, the woman felt deceived. “Every day this hunchback says the same thing! But what does he mean?”
And one day, being especially irritated, she decided to end this. “I’ll get rid of this nasty hunchback!” She said to herself and added poison to the second tortilla. But when she was about to put her on the windowsill, the woman’s hands trembled. “What am I doing?” – she thought. And immediately threw the poisonous tortilla into the fire, cooked another one and put it on the windowsill. The hunchback, as usual, took the cake, muttering the constant words: “The evil that you do remains with you, and the good returns to you!” and continued on his way, unaware of the emotions raging inside the woman.

That same night someone knocked on the door. When the woman opened it, she saw her son standing in the doorway. He looked awful: hungry, thin, weak, in torn clothes. “Mom, it’s just a miracle that I’m here! I was just a mile from home, but I was so hungry that I fainted. I probably would have died, but just then some old hunchback passed by and he was so kind to me that he gave a whole cake. And he said that this was his only meal for the whole day, but he sees that I need her more than he does. ” When the mother heard these words, her face turned pale and she leaned to the door so as not to fall. She remembered the poisoned morning cake. After all, if she had not burned it in the fire, her own son would have died! It was then that the woman understood the meaning of the words: “The evil that you do remains with you, and the good returns to you!”

Moral of the story: Strive to do good always, even if no one appreciates it now.

“Every time you do a good deed you shine the light a little farther into the dark. And the thing is, when you’re gone that light is going to keep shining on, pushing the shadows back.” Charles de lint

Source:https://vk.com/public75290000

Source:https://vk.com/we_live_a

Family and Society, Life, Personal Musings

Affinity, Soul and Time

Posted on April 28, 2019February 1, 2019 by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“How will a person know, Selina, when the soul that has the affinity with hers is near it?” She answered, “She will know. Does she look for air, before she breathes it? This love will be guided to her; and when it comes, she will know. And she will do anything to keep that love about her, then. Because to lose it will be like a death to her.” Sarah Waters (… the author of Affinity)

Boy meets girl, by chance. Sparks fly but not much more after that. Fast forward years later. Lady meets a gentleman. Sparks fly and the fire is lit. If not, years on, an elderly man meets the woman of his dreams. Both old, yet sparks fly and the fire is lit. Forever or not, only time will know.

Source:https://vk.com/public75290000

The above scenario may seem familiar. Our story or the story of someone we know or have heard of, may resonate with certain events as written above. What strikes one most on looking back, is the affinity between the two souls, no matter how far away. While “reel life” dramatizes the whole concept to “first look of pure love”; real life can range in varying degrees from mutual acceptance or comfort to instant attraction or the deep feeling of being complete. It varies from person to person.

For some “soul affinity” strikes instantly; while for others, it does not arise suddenly. Love with all its’ due respect, doesn’t arise from nothing. Where there is a fire, there are sparks. True love grows from a small sprout, of respect and admiration for a person, to love, affection and friendship comprising of pleasant moments through the attention given to each other. Love encompasses knowing the other; respecting the differences as well providing empathy, care and attention. Once experienced, its’ a feeling best described by emotions, memories and moments, more than the words that one can say.

“Love is the affinity which links and draws together the elements of the world… Love, in fact, is the agent of universal synthesis.” Pierre Teilhard de Chardin

Source:https://vk.com/monahos

Source:https://vk.com/public138314547

Source:https://vk.com/public75290000

Source:https://vk.com/public138314547

Life, poetry, Reflections

Essence of Man

Posted on April 26, 2019February 4, 2019 by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

The other day, we had heard some disturbing news of a close friend of the family. Although we had kept in regular contact, little did we realize that time and circumstance can be so cruel at times. Disease, disaster and death; these events are never in our control, although man tries his best to master them.

The events of yesterday brought to mind, the words of Yevgeny Yevtushenko’s poem, “People”. Each of our lives is like a map, with a course, evidence and impressions that we leave behind when we finally end our time. While time is never in our control, the route that we take along with the diversions, destinations and rest stops is ours alone. Decision, choices and changes are always in our hands, hence using them wisely is what we can and should do.

“Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we’ve been waiting for. We are the change that we seek.” Barack Obama

Source:https://vk.com/englisharoundtheworld

People

No people are uninteresting.
Their fate is like the chronicle of planets.

Nothing in them in not particular,
and planet is dissimilar from planet.

And if a man lived in obscurity
making his friends in that obscurity
obscurity is not uninteresting.

To each his world is private
and in that world one excellent minute.

And in that world one tragic minute
These are private.

In any man who dies there dies with him
his first snow and kiss and fight it goes with him.

There are left books and bridges
and painted canvas and machinery
Whose fate is to survive.

But what has gone is also not nothing:
by the rule of the game something has gone.
Not people die but worlds die in them.

Whom we knew as faulty, the earth’s creatures
Of whom, essentially, what did we know?

Brother of a brother? Friend of friends?
Lover of lover?

We who knew our fathers
in everything, in nothing.

They perish. They cannot be brought back.
The secret worlds are not regenerated.

And every time again and again
I make my lament against destruction.

Yevgeny Yevtushenko

Source:https://vk.com/englisharoundtheworld

Daily, Personal Musings, Quotes, Reflections

To Allow Ourselves

Posted on April 19, 2019February 1, 2019 by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

One of the persistent feelings that runs down every couple of months is the “feeling of being trapped, compressed and stuck” into something that we want not to be a part of. In those occasions certain gentle reminders will help us get back into the grove of being content and at peace with ourselves.

“The snow goose need not bathe to make itself white. Neither need you do anything but be yourself.” Lao Tzu

Source:https://vk.com/public75290000

Source:https://vk.com/we_live_a

Let ourselves to be wrong once in a while. It doesn’t really matter what others think about what we know or don’t, or what we said or didn’t. For the record, mistakes happen to all. No one can be truly accurate or right in their known field or what others expect us to know. No can be the “knowledge holder” of everything. At times, we tend to go wrong and so be it.

Once in a while, get out of the rush. Do make a slight change in the daily routine. Routines are lovely for they set things going and offer least surprises and roadblocks. Yet every now and then, break out, set a change and be surprised.

Hold the thoughts, words and anger when sorely tried. Try to allow ourselves to not respond to provocations. Certain things or events once done, can’t be easily undone, deleted or reversed. The impact and consequences may be near or in the future. Once damaged, not everything can be reset. Why then attempt to test those waters, when one knows that sharks will bite.

“To help yourself, you must be yourself. Be the best that you can be. When you make a mistake, learn from it, pick yourself up and move on.” Dave Pelzer

Source:https://vk.com/public75290000

Avoid the trend to not make excuses, neither do anything to prove ourselves or when strongly persuaded. Regret is time lost. Once the sequence of events are set in motion, regret then or later will not revert the sequence or consequence.

Allow ourselves to let go and walk away. Step aside, away from those who are in the way or from those who resent us for the sake of it. Actions sidestepped are better for the peace. Even if we initiate the side step; more than the ego being trampled on, the mind will be at ease.

Being different is alright and fine. One doesn’t have try to fit into any categories, frames, stereotypes, typologies and types. Neither does one have to justify the expectations set by others. At the end of the day, we have to be comfortable in our own skin and mould.

Try not to run ahead or behind. Be at par with the speed of life and time. Just don’t run. At times, waiting for the train till it comes at the right station crossing or turn may be better to start going in the right direction again.

Above all, allow ourselves to be just ourselves.