Posted in Christian, Daily, Family and Society, Life, Quotes, Reflections, Work

Dealing With that Itch

With spring season around and evening walks are in the to-do list, one may have encountered the occasional sting or bite when on or after the walk. When the mosquito bites or insect stings, the deadly red mark starts forming in the skin. There are few distinct pictures that follow. First the yell or howl, followed by the distinct smack (almost always missing the culprit) with the application of a balm to soothe the pain. Left alone, the bite slowly settles and passes after a while. On the other hand, once the sting appears and one enters the itch mode, then the bite is extensively combed, scratched and the blister (in the place of the little red spot) is born. Consequently the sting stays, the irritation grows and the pain doesn’t recede. Worse is the infection and the bleeding that then follows. Being a parent to a toddler, one must be familiar with this cycle.

“Without forgiveness life is governed by… an endless cycle of resentment and retaliation.” Roberto Assagioli

Yet what is familiar, is the “feeling of the itch” is something similar to resentment. How we deal with resentment falls into similar patterns of an insect bite. Resented when treated in the right manner, ceases to sting; but when scratched, makes the whole mood go down. When dealt with an insult; if one tries to forgive and forget it, then it gradually goes out of the hearts. On self -dissecting it and chronic dwelling on it similar to self-persecution or self-pity; then the insult becomes stronger and deadlier.

“Our fatigue is often caused not by work, but by worry, frustration and resentment.” Dale Carnegie

Dealing with offense is not easy. True that we must reflect on the events that had happened and words or actions exchanged. But one doesn’t have to mark it against oneself and fester it, to the point of destroying the self. Instead hand over those feelings to the wind, for then we become more wiser and gracious. For when things are left to His Will, life becomes more sweet and simple. This is a very good skill that is learned over the course of time.

“Let go of resentment for it will hold you back. Do not worry about what could have been, what is to come is what matters.” Leon Brown

Take the burden that we can handle and the rest, hand them over to Him and let His Will be done. The same with resentment. Yes one was offended but one doesn’t have to carry it around and ruin the only life that we have been blessed with. Let things figure out eventually in His Time and then we discover that what was felt big, bad and ugly initially will seem inconsequential in the long run in His Time.

“The final proof of greatness lies in being able to endure criticism without resentment.” Elbert Hubbard

Posted in Family and Society, Life, Personal Musings, Photography Art, Reflections, Stories Around the World, Work

Stepping Out of the Game

“A man can fail many times, but he isn’t a failure until he begins to blame somebody else.” John Burroughs

There lived two families in the neighborhood. In one family there was silence and grace, while in the second there were endless quarrels, showdowns etc. And then one day the wife said to her husband, “Why don’t you find out how they next door, turn out to live without scandals.” The husband went and hid behind their common fence and watched. As the neighbor washes the threshold, a bucket of water stands next to her and then her husband walked. Inadvertently he hooked his foot on the bucket and overturned it. “Well, it will start now,” thinks the neighbor behind the fence. Instead he heard the wife as she apologized to her husband that she had put a bucket of water in the way. And her husband also apologized to her for he had walked without looking and also added work to his beloved. In general, they apologized to each other, cleaned up everything together and went into the house. And the hapless neighbor came home in bewilderment and told his wife: “You know, my wife it is strange, we try to do everything right and have endless scandals, whereas they are both to blame and everything is amicable”.

“At the end of the day, you are solely responsible for your success and your failure. And the sooner you realize that, you accept that, and integrate that into your work ethic, you will start being successful. As long as you blame others for the reason you aren’t where you want to be, you will always be a failure.” Erin Cummings

Famously and colloquially known as “the blame game”, we all have been a part of it at some point in our life. From the high school days of incomplete assignment, low grades or addled performances to the college or university days, leading on to the work front; assigning of blame to someone else’s shoulders have been done consciously or subconsciously.

“Everyone’s quick to blame the alien.” Aeschylus

Like the spider’s web, once we get caught in this game; we tend to apply the same tactics in all the spheres of our life. Consequently the price paid is heavy, for not just effort but energy, work, relationships and above all, time is wasted. To get the trend down, a few quick steps would aid in sorting out and settling the mess.

“No matter how much fault you find with another, and regardless of how much you blame him, it will not change you. The only thing blame does is to keep the focus off you when you are looking for… reasons to explain your unhappiness or frustration.” Casey Stengel

When stuck in the mess or being falsely targeted for the work; first take a deep breath. Second were we in any way wrong, either while doing the task or assigning the task. If yes, take corrective measures; if not, still the option is to settle the scene and correct the wrong. Third and very practical of all, let bygones be bygones. Learn form the past, but don’t dwell too much on it, to spoil the pleasant surprises of the future.

“Don’t find fault, find a remedy.” Henry Ford

Posted in Christian, Daily, Family and Society, Personal Musings, Quotes, Stories Around the World

Plans, Eternity and Time

Time and Eternity

A man was taking it easy, lying on the grass and looking up at the clouds. He was identifying shapes when he decided to talk to God. “God”, he said, “how long is a million years?”
God answered, “In my frame of reference, it’s about a minute.”
The man asked, “God, how much is a million dollars?”
God answered, “To Me, it’s a penny.”
The man then asked, “God, can I have a penny?”
God said, “In a minute.”

“We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps.” (Proverbs 16:9 NLT)

The other day, as the family had gathered post Saturday weekend luncheon, among the various topics being discussed were the renovation of the family homestead, plans for the college admissions and the like. What surfaced to my mind, was the fragility of human plans.

“Faith is putting all your eggs in God’s basket, then counting your blessings before they hatch.” Ramona C. Carroll

Many a time, man has planned numerous events, for the present, the immediate and the distant future. Little do we realize that most of our planning is based on chance. We base the future on a sequence of events believed to happen in a particular manner. When one block is pulled out of the regular, things may still go as per plan. But pull out a couple of them, then most plans come crashing down.

“And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.” (Romans 8:28 NLT)

On the other hand, plans are needed to sort out our purpose and drive in life. Yet the whole procedure can be done, putting our Faith and dreams in God’s hand and above all, plan and know one’s limits.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do and he will show you which path to take.” (Proverbs 3:5-6 NLT)

Man needs to plan to grow and progress with time, else idleness and monotony would set in. Yet the lines have to be drawn at when, how, what and which plans to dream of and which not to. We need to dream big; but also realistic, kind, honest and true.

“God and Nature first made us what we are, and then out of our own created genius we make ourselves what we want to be. Follow always that great law. Let the sky and God be our limit and Eternity our measurement.” Marcus Garvey

Posted in Life, Quotes, Reflections, Work

Nurture the Patience

In this instantaneous times that we are a part of, somewhere along the way we began expecting all the events and happenings to occur in a set sequence, allotting each step a limited amount of time set by us. Alas, as nature has time and again shown, the timeline that man sets can never be followed to a “T”. Instead both time and nature have taught mankind the essential art of patience.

Take for instance, the Chinese Bamboo Tree, it takes 5 years for it to reach the 80 feet height in six weeks. In the first year, despite the nurturing through water, sunlight and rich fertile soil; there is no visible sign of growth. Continuing on for three to four years; there is no evidence of the plant growing above the ground. Yet when it reaches its’ magnificent height during the fifth, the tree neither breaks nor bends as its’ strong root system which it has been growing for the past four years holds it firm and strong. Had the tree not developed a strong unseen foundation it could not have sustained its life as it grew. There are many more lessons that nature and God’s creations teach us, from caterpillar to butterflies, ugly ducklings to graceful swans, the radiance of sunflower and the rise of the green shoots through the end of the winter to mark spring.

Never cut a tree down in the wintertime. Never make a negative decision in the low time. Never make your most important decisions when you are in your worst moods. Wait. Be patient. The storm will pass. The spring will come. Robert H. Schuller

Like nature, those who set their pace with patience find great rewards and inner peace. Contrary to the popular notion, patience doesn’t imply the ability to simply endure or wait, neither it is a humiliation nor a compromise of one’s beliefs, desires or ambitions.

Patience is the ability to maintain the equanimity of the spirit in those circumstances that interfere with the inner peace or composure. Patience also epitomizes the behaviour while we are waiting. Patience is the ability to go towards the goal, strengthening perseverance especially when there are various obstacles on the way. Patience is the ability to maintain a joyful spirit in the midst of difficulties, troubles and sadness. Patience is there when victorious and overcoming the hurdles. Patience adopts the form of courage in face of trials, temptations and tempest. This is what true patience encompasses.

I have seen many storms in my life. Most storms have caught me by surprise, so I had to learn very quickly to look further and understand that I am not capable of controlling the weather, to exercise the art of patience and to respect the fury of nature. Paulo Coelho

People who patiently toil towards their dreams and goals, build their character while overcoming adversity and challenge, setting the strong internal foundation to handle success. Meanwhile those who with impatience use the shortcuts to get rich, famous and earn the stamp of being successful, more often discover that they are usually unable to sustain the unearned sudden wealth. For to support true success, the armour of patience, fortitude and perseverance are necessary to don the cloak of inner peace and triumph.

The two most powerful warriors are patience and time. Leo Tolstoy

Posted in Life, Quotes, Random Thoughts

Still in the Works

The irony of matter being multi-dimensional is not confined to physical entities alone.

Here metaphorically speaking, the reference is to people in general. If you ever tried doing anything good or a favour, rest assured that among the three people who have heard of it, at least one would have thought about whether the good part would have benefits. On the other hand, how many times have we refused innocuous favours as we feel they come with strings attached ? Honest answers though bitter would make us realize the multidimensional facet of human nature.

Having said this, we still love each other. Despite the tussles with our respective better half, altercations with family, disagreements with friends and hassles with colleagues and work authorities; nothing would make us change our world in our hearts. While we consider some unreasonable in our books, we might be the same for somebody else in their pages. As nobody is ever perfect, everyone has their unique mould with its own fair share of flaws and the cracks that makes every person a work of art.

Yes, people are unreasonable, inconsistent and selfish. And still love them. If you do good, people will accuse you of hidden self-interest and self-love. And still do good. If you are accompanied by success, you will find secret and obvious enemies. And yet strive for success. The good that you have done today will be forgotten tomorrow. And still do good. Sincerity and openness will make you vulnerable. And yet be sincere and open. What you have built over the years can collapse in an instant. And yet build. People will ask you for help, but they will blame you for it. And still help people. Give the world the best that you have and you will receive a cruel blow. And yet give the best that you have. – Mother Teresa

Posted in Daily, Quotes, Reflections, Stories Around the World

Surprise for Kindness

“Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others.”Philippians 2:4 (NKJV)

Unfortunately, in this modern world that we are all a part of, taking care of ourselves and families is another rat-race. Amidst all the melee it is quite difficult to be kind, especially when doing so would put you in a bind. Sometimes at that moment we feel that by lending a hand we end up giving up our desires and dreams. Yet little do we know that how far that little bit of kindness can go. Ideally, the random acts of kindness should be done expecting nothing in return. As by kindness is when we light others by our own inner flame. Small acts of kindness, a lending hand or even a simple hug, are one among the many essence of humaneness that makes the darkness fade away. Over the years, we realize that we have been blessed with two hands, one to lend and one to help ourselves or receive help. There is a story that I had once read about the mechanic. Although I don’t know if it’s true or not, this story reminds me of life’s surprises courtesy of random acts of kindness.

Story of the Mechanic

Jimmy is an automotive mechanic, but he has not worked for some time now. He always has a good heart, but always feared applying for a new job. One day, he gathered up all his strength and finally decided he will attend an interview. All dressed up in a neat white shirt and slacks pants, he went on his way. His appointment was at 10 am and it’s already 8:30. While waiting for a bus to ride going to the office where he is supposed to be interviewed, he saw an elderly man frantically kicking the tire of his car. Obvious that the there is something wrong with the car, Jimmy offered to help the old man with the problem. While he was working on the car, Jimmy told the old man that he was supposed to go to an interview as a mechanic in one company but would probably miss it because he would not be able to make it on time.
When Jimmy finished working on the old man’s car, the old man asked him how much for the service. Jimmy said there’s no need to pay him because it was not work for him, just helped someone in need. “Well, I could offer to take you to the office for your interview. It’s the least I could do, please I insist” the old man was persistent. So he agreed.
At the waiting room of the Company Jimmy has applied for, there was a long line of applicants waiting to be interviewed, and he was told that the interviewer was late. A sigh of relief for Jimmy, but other applicants looked over to him because he still has some grease on him left after the car repair. He did not have much time to wash it off or have a change of shirt.
One by one, the applicants left the interviewer’s office with gloomy looks on their faces, a sign of disappointment.
Then his name was called, the secretary escorted him to the office. A cup of coffee was served for him; the interviewer was sitting on an executive chair facing towards the office window. Rocking the executive chair back and forth he asked “Do you really need to be interviewed?” Jimmy’s heart sank. The room suddenly became a confined space for him. “With the way I look now, how could I possibly pass this interview?” he thought to himself.
Then the interviewer turned the chair and to Jimmy’s surprise, it was the old man he helped earlier in the morning. It turned out; he was the General Manager of the company Jimmy was applying at. “Sorry I had to keep you waiting, but I was pretty sure I made the right decision of having you as part of our workforce before you even stepped into this office. I just know you’d be a trustworthy worker, congratulations.” Jimmy sat down as they shared a cup of well-deserved coffee as he landed himself a new job.
-Short story by Jayson M. Familara

Although the surprises of kindness follows the common adage “you reap what you sow”. Yet as time goes by, we realize that kindness should be done without expecting anything in return. Instead, our inner light should want to do the random act of goodness. And that by itself, should give us light at times of trouble.

To quote Amelia Earhart, “A single act of kindness throws out roots in all directions, and the roots spring up and make new trees.” Whether we get the shade of the tree or not, globally the new trees will benefit the ecosystem as a whole.

Posted in Christian, Personal Musings, poetry, Stories Around the World

Learn from the Stars

This is one of the poems I had chanced upon in my social network page. The words remind of His Almighty power and Grace. The glory of the universe have perplexed mankind for centuries. Man tries to break it down to the tunes of science, astrophysics, particle physics and so forth. Yet the reality is that sometimes even science reaches a quandary of exact specifications of how the universe was created and the stars  were possible. 

Lord, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth!

You have set your glory in the heavens. Psalms 8:1, New International Version

 

Learning from the universe especially the stars is an exhausting task. Each time I gaze upon the sky, there are new patterns to be found; man calls them constellations – the way we perceive it. In the darkness or the blaring sunlight; through the storms and through the wind and rain; the stars thrive declaring the glory of the Lord by their very existence.

“Star far in the window
Through the thickness of the space in a hurry.
Hence it seems to me a crumb,
But how it burns, but how it burns !!

She does not care about the whim of the weather,
Silent and oppressive gloom.
It burns centuries and years:
God Himself has defined it so …

And I would like in the lot 
that God entrusted me,
To do my work properly, So that God could boast of me!

And as the night star
shine Delivers its distant light,
So my fragrance
Let him leave a good trace!

Ermolova S.

When I consider your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars,    which you have set in place, what is mankind that you are mindful of them, human beings that you care for them? You have made them a little lower than the angels and crowned them with glory and honor. Psalm 8:3-5, New International Version (NIV) Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV® Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.