Tag: happy

Posted in Family and Society, Personal Musings, Quotes, Stories Around the World

Rein in the Fist

Posted on by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

Though the holiday mode has started, with travel to tourist places restricted; it is the woods and the farm fields that have occupied most of the spare childhood hours, thus making the work at home option feasible for a few days. Which is why while making my entries in the excel spreadsheet, a sudden clatter of metal and cries of pain forced to make a rush to the pantry where I caught the young one with his hand stuck in the jar of crisps and in the mute howling phase. Like the monkey who trapped his hand in the jar, a couple of minutes he lit off before I could settle the scene and deal with the fiasco.

Reliving those moments over the pre-lunch tea session, the morning incident reminded me of the monkey’s hand which had caught in the jar for the fistful of cookies were too big to come out through the mouth of the jar. Just like the monkey, we adults too grab whatever our fists can hold, resulting in biting more than one can chew and staying stuck in the big jar of “life” getting stuck knee-deep when retreat would have been feasible.

“So the unwanting soul sees what’s hidden,
and the ever-wanting soul sees only what it wants.”
Lao Tzu

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Growing up, the stress was often laid on being successful, making something profitable out of life and the ventures that we do. As we mature, one experiences the profits and gains and basks in their glory. Eventually one may lose sight of the more important things in life, realizing that their hold on those things have been lost. Once when one realizes that the really important things in life have been lost, then those material profits and gain become completely worthless.

“He who is not contented with what he has, would not be contented with what he would like to have.” Socrates

Defining when to rein in the profits and close down the run for amassing more, or just to continue on, rests on what one considers important close to their heart. Greed is one of those things that can infiltrate any stage of success silently, grow therein and create complete unrest in a subtle manner, such that one realizes that the profits gained were meaningless in context of the damage wrought.

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One should make most out of any venture, trying for it to be a success on all fronts. Yet the highlight is to rein the urge to confine all the glory to one, amass more or just hoard the rewards. By letting go a bit of that fist, one can enjoy a bit of the reward then instead of losing out to a worse predicament later on. Also one could grab less or just a handful and share it out, so that rewards enjoyed around would life a lot more fun, happy and joyful; just enough to fit into each of our fists.

The Greedy Mouse
A greedy mouse saw a basket full of corn. He wanted to eat all of the corn so he made a small hole in the basket. He squeezed in through the hole. He ate a lot of corn until he was full and was very happy. Now he wanted to come out. He tried to come out through the small hole. He could not. His belly was full. He tried again. But it was of no use. The mouse started crying. A rabbit was passing by. It heard the mouse’s cry and asked, “Why are you crying, my friend?” The mouse explained, “I made a small hole and came into the basket to eat the corn. Now I am not able to get out through that hole.”

The rabbit said, “It is because you ate too much. Wait till your belly shrinks.” The rabbit laughed and went away. The mouse fell asleep in the basket. The next morning his belly had shrunk. But he wanted to eat some more corn. He forgot all about getting out of the basket. So he ate the corn and his belly was really big again.After eating, the mouse remembered that he had to escape. But obviously, he could not. So he thought, “Oh! Now I will go out tomorrow.” The cat was the next passerby. He smelt the mouse in the basket. He lifted its lid and ate the mouse.

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Posted in Family and Society, Life, Photography Art, poetry, Random Thoughts

To Live By

Posted on by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

During my childhood years, we had an assortment of pets. From the farm dog Racer, our first adopted furry stray cat Straw, Goldetta’s ducklings whom we all had named and trailed around them to the couple of horses and cows who had stayed on. As the years went by, some of them we lost back to nature, few we had sold off and few new ones had become a part of our new family. Each of them gave us precious memories to laugh and smile about. Being sorely homesick in first year of college; I had gotten my first goldfish Angel. While she had lasted through couple of months beyond two years, her presence had lit up the unsettling days. She was someone who was there giving her colour to the dull days and swimming her lively greeting in circles while she was around.

As we enter the real-life working world, one realizes that school and college were just camping grounds. Entering into the arena of office politics, work ribbing and general chaos; one discovers that unless one holds true to own self, one could themselves dissolve into complete chaos.

“You gotta find your best self and when you do, you gotta hold on to it for dear life.” Cheryl Strayed

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Regardless of circumstances, life teaches us to live through the situation, adapting with fine changes and make the best of our days. While one may never reach the heights or society defined pinnacle of success, staying happy is what matters. Holding onto the inner faith, honour and principle is what makes the best guilt-free and priceless memories. Instead of holding each day by the list of to-do’s or the projects to achieve alone; each day should be embraced with the promise to just enjoy the hours.

“Do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” Theodore Roosevelt

Each of us have our own colour to add to the canvas. While for sometimes they may be dull, other days those are the very colours that may brighten up the days for those around us. When all the colours come together and the canvas unrolled, that painting leaves a mark in each of the lives that surround us.

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My Creed
by Edgar A. Guest

To live as gently as I can;
To be, no matter where, a man;
To take what comes of good or ill
And cling to faith and honor still;

To do my best, and let that stand
The record of my brain and hand;
And then, should failure come to me,
Still work and hope for victory.

To have no secret place wherein
I stoop unseen to shame or sin;
To be the same when I’m alone
As when my every deed is known;

To live undaunted, unafraid
Of any step that I have made;
To be without pretense or sham
Exactly what men think I am.

To leave some simple mark behind
To keep my having lived in mind;
If enmity to aught I show,
To be an honest, generous foe,

To play my little part, nor whine
That greater honors are not mine.
This, I believe, is all I need
For my philosophy and creed.

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Posted in Life, Personal Musings, Photography Art, poetry, Random Thoughts

Solace of “Doing Nothing”

Posted on by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

As a part of the management policy, employees are required to take at least twenty percent of their entire leaves (both annual and casual) each year. Which is why, three of my colleagues had to take their leaves, though they weren’t requiring any break from the regular. While one of them had enjoyed a short break with family at a getaway; with school for their kids, two of them were kind of stuck in their towns. Yet after their allotted leaves, on return, there was a positive spark in their eyes. To the often phrased query of “what did you do during your leave”, their response was thought-provoking, especially when the words were “we did nothing”.

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For some of us, the very act of doing nothing, may relate to sheer idleness. And as the famous adage goes, “An idle mind is a devil’s workshop.” Yet the day off, meaning a day of doing nothing, is primarily meant to be away from all the problem solving, completion of tasks or a break from the social life or business of the day. While there is comfort in the daily routine, every now and then each of us need time off, to just “not think”.

“Every person needs to take one day away. A day in which one consciously separates the past from the future. Jobs, family, employers, and friends can exist one day without any one of us, and if our egos permit us to confess, they could exist eternally in our absence. Each person deserves a day away in which no problems are confronted, no solutions searched for. Each of us needs to withdraw from the cares which will not withdraw from us.” Maya Angelou

None of us, are indispensable, specially as far as social and career life is considered. Amidst all this chaos, taking a breather is necessary for maintaining he inner balance. Sometimes, one doesn’t need to do or think, but just go with the flow and experience the calming effects of the life around us. The best holidays would be one where one learns to just appreciate the wind dance with the leaves, dance on the water, smell the dew as well as enjoy the breeze in the hammock. These quiet moments of doing nothing, help us face the turbulence that time may take us through later.

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Today I Am Doing Nothing

It’s a plan in itself,
Not an open invitation for suggestions
To go on long walks, or dancing,
Or paint-balling, or take a drive
Down to the beach.

It doesn’t mean I am free
To do one of the hundreds of tasks
You decide are more important,
In an attempt to fill my day
With a different kind of meaning.

Today I am doing nothing,
Because I have become lost,
In a world where doing something, anything
Is so expected of ourselves and each other
That simply doing nothing is viewed
As a waste of time.

We so rarely have opportunity
To have the conversations in our heads
That determine who we really are,
As we watch the moments floating past,
Lying under the stars.

Today I am doing nothing,
Please understand that what I desire,
Is silent doorbells, unknocked doors
And that the phone doesn’t ring
As I curl up by the fire.

– Nigel Finn

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Posted in Family and Society, Personal Musings, Quotes, Reflections, Work

More than Exist

Posted on by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

While working in the first job opportunity after college, my brother had to move out to the new city. Over the next couple of months as the call duration and frequency to home decreased, my parents’ radar went into full frequency mode and it had grabbed yours truly. After all a couple of calls, the instinct sense that something was wrong was pretty strong. Whether it was by His Grace that a work travel opportunity had presented itself to his office or just a matter of chance; making the visit was an eye-opener. The short phone conversations and the decreased frequency of calls wasn’t just due to work stress but the unhappiness in doing something which he never wanted to. Though it took plenty of courage and risks; he did get out of the mess and went on to another office doing the advertisement projects that he had trained and wanted to.

“Get action. Do things; be sane; don’t fritter away your time; create, act, take a place wherever you are and be somebody; get action.” Theodore Roosevelt

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We all get stuck in those unexpected ruts. Full of promise and hope of what was once good, mayn’t seem so a couple of months later. That is when it is time to call a temporary halt to reexamine the situation and find a path out. The tussle is between the surety of the present and the uncertainty of the next that causes one to choose the former. Yet in the long run, it isn’t just existence that drives one person forward, but the courage to take the path to do what one loves to do.

“We must learn to reawaken and keep ourselves awake, not by mechanical aids, but by an infinite expectation of the dawn, which does not forsake us even in our soundest sleep. I know of no more encouraging fact than the unquestionable ability of man to elevate his life by a conscious endeavour. It is something to be able to paint a particular picture, or to carve a statue, and so to make a few objects beautiful; but it is far more glorious to carve and paint the very atmosphere and medium through which we look, which morally we can do. To affect the quality of the day, that is the highest of arts.” Henry David Thoreau

The inner spirit has to stay strong. When things may go downhill for a time, take a break and choose to do something about it. Even though it may be a late attempt, but it is way better than to just exist. It is that spark in each of us, that gives the glow and a special meaning to the gift of life, time and love that we all have been fortunate to be blessed with.

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Credo
by Jack London

I would rather be ashes than dust!
I would rather that my spark
should burn out in a brilliant blaze
than it should be stifled by dry-rot.

I would rather be a superb meteor
every atom of me in magnificent glow
than a sleepy and permanent planet.

The function of man is to live
not to exist.
I shall not waste my days trying to prolong them.
I shall use my time.

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Posted in Christian, Daily, Family and Society, Random Thoughts, Reflections

In Disguise

Posted on by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

Suffering from osteoarthritis, an elderly lady made her way out of the train and found herself in front of a flight of stairs with no directions leading to an elevator in sight. As she got prepared for the tedious journey up the stairs, a station attendant arrived and lend a hand. Imagine her surprise when she reached above and saw a wheelchair waiting for her. As we saw from the platform across, she was assisted till the main station entrance.

“The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.'” (Mathew 25:40)

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While getting stuck in traffic, imagine the fiasco created when a car stalls with a flat tire. While fist-waving with blaring of horns were started by some, two others stepped out of their cars and assisted the driver in changing the flat. Whether it was done to ease their comfort of travel or simply helping a fellow traveller, that extended support of actions gave the day a better feel.

Arriving at the departure gate and waiting at the airport in the check-in luggage queue, when an elderly couple had arrived with their crying grandchild in tow, the support extended by the airport officials as well as fellow passengers in quietly allowing them to move ahead soon, gave an added touch to the meaning of “hospitality, humaneness and kindness”.

“Do not forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by so doing some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it.” (Hebrews 13:2)

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Whether these helpers were doing their job or lending a helping hand, they were the cloaked angels of many. Being hospitable doesn’t mean simply a warm welcome when there are visitors but by radiating warmth and a welcome feel in our day-to-day activities. It is when one chooses to help those who we don’t know, is when the real feeling of warmth seeps in for all.

Essentially we are on similar lines or pages, though it may be on different curves, tangents or views. Each of us have our own baggage of personal, professional, social, physical, emotional and mental issues. Though the baggage may be light for some, heavy for others; it s always there. Being nice or doing good, doesn’t require all of us to hang on a banner and light up the lights. Rather it involves, simple acts of kindness and hospitality. Angels don’t simply come as radiant or winged beings, but also as weary travellers, hungry or hassled and tired. In those moments, when we become angels for some or be served by angels, we become closer to Christ and experience the true warmth of His Peace, His Love and His Grace.

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Posted in Life, Personal Musings, poetry, Quotes

Not as the Speculation

Posted on by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“Definitions belong to the definers, not the defined.” Toni Morrison

Preparations for the silver jubilee of the high school batch had begun well in advance, almost a year ahead. From inquiries among batch-mates about schedules, plans and venues to coordinating with the present school and alumni council, no stone was left unturned to reconnect with all members of the same batch year. Catching up to the present day, there was a couple of surprises in store for everyone. Besides the personal additions to the class, there were the professional landmarks and various talents that had come into play over the years; all which were way off the conjectures based on the know of the high school years.

“Those who have knowledge, don’t predict. Those who predict, don’t have knowledge.” Lao Tzu

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No matter how many suppositions one may presume, the reality may be something near the perceived or far off the mark. At times, it is more of the latter that makes one realize that at times perceived notions can be way out of the expected. As each of us had made our way into the world, shedding off the cloaks of the teenage years and entering into the young adult stage; not one of us would have been able to exactly predict the directions that we would turn. While for some of us, the final destination of the present day is close to the dream we had seen; for few others the present reality is way better than the future views held in the mind of those days.

“Life is no different than the weather. Not only is it unpredictable, but it shows us a new perspective of the world every day.” Suzy Kassem

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Whether the top scorer of the class reaches the pinnacle of success or the one with low grades runs his own company; towards the end of the day all those don’t matter. Neither does each of us have the power to completely judge or label one, neither does one like to labelled or judged. Whether the scorer of those days is successful today or not, it doesn’t affect the present day lives of most of us. As long as one is content from within, the true essence of life is then experienced. Though guess-work and suppositions may be nowhere near the reality, it doesn’t matter as long as each of us are happy in our own paths. And that is the true beauty of life, to feel and explore the dreams, aspiration and talents closest to the heart.

The heartthrob of the school, is a man grim and somber.
That lanky little girl, is now a weightlifter.
The topper of the class, is a happy homemaker.
Back bencher of the lot, is an entrepreneur.
The flamboyant fashionista, became a dreaded lawyer.
Oft ignored average Joe, turned a well known writer.
The one who failed math paper, is a fashion designer,
And one who often got to stand outside the class, is a respected army officer.
The reunion taught me how, people came with many layers, and tell me why should we never, judge a book by its cover.
–Anjali Sharma

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Posted in Life, poetry, Random Thoughts

To Rest, Free

Posted on by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

Weekends are precious. At times it is so because one tries to squeeze in the dues from the week before or catch up with family and friends who have been neglected for a while, or to catch up with own personal stuff. Though at times, weekends are more precious because it’s one of the days when one tries to simply do nothing. To a point, my husband and I try to fit the weekend in the last category. With the children kept busy till lunch; the post lunch session includes an hour or two of their favourite cartoons or movie, while as adults we resolve to just lie in the yard, free of any thoughts or plans.

“Rest is not idleness, and to lie sometimes on the grass under trees on a summer’s day, listening to the murmur of the water, or watching the clouds float across the sky, is by no means a waste of time.” John Lubbock

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Trying to stay “thought free” for a hour or half every weekend does wonders for the soul. To contemplate or think about nothing, while one is still alert is an art in itself. While an idle mind mayn’t be a bad workshop, to be free of thoughts for a while is on a totally different plane. Each of us have plenty of inner worries that often tend to surface when the hands stay still and the mind wanders. To still that wandering mind of worries takes effort and plenty of faith laced with hope.

“The most valuable thing we can do for the psyche, occasionally, is to let it rest, wander, live in the changing light of room, not try to be or do anything whatever.” May Sarton

To rest and feel free is a wonderful gift to experience. To relax doesn’t require one to be kept busy or watch plenty of visuals. One of the best ways to de-stress would be just to lie in the hammock and watch the sunset or to close the eyes and feel the smell of dewy grass. All these provide rest for the psyche. Still those wandering unbidden thoughts and instead, just do nothing but lie still. Those moments of stillness are quite enough to rejuvenate one for the never ending chaos and cares of the current times.

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The House of Rest

I will build a house of rest,
Square the corners every one:
At each angle on his breast
Shall a cherub take the sun;
Rising, risen, sinking, down,
Weaving day’s unequal crown.

In the chambers, light as air,
Shall responsive footsteps fall:
Brother, sister, art thou there?
Hush! we need not jar nor call;
Need not turn to seek the face
Shut in rapture’s hiding-place.

Heavy load and mocking care
Shall from back and bosom part;
Thought shall reach the thrill of prayer,
Patience plan the dome of art.
None shall praise or merit claim,
Not a joy be called by name.

With a free, unmeasured tread
Shall we pace the cloisters through:
Rest, enfranchised, like the Dead;
Rest till Love be born anew.
Weary Thought shall take his time,
Free of task-work, loosed from rhyme.

No reproof shall grieve or chill;
Every sin doth stand confest;
None need murmur, ‘This was ill’:
Therefore do they grant us rest;
Contemplation making whole
Every ruin of the soul.

Pictures shall as softly look
As in distance shows delight;
Slowly shall each saintly book
Turn its pages in our sight;
Not the study’s wealth confuse,
Urging zeal to pale abuse.

Children through the windows peep,
Not reproachful, though our own;
Hushed the parent passion deep,
And the household’s eager tone.
One above, divine and true,
Makes us children like to you.

Measured bread shall build us up
At the hospitable board;
In Contentment’s golden cup
Is the guileless liquor poured.
May the beggar pledge the king
In that spirit gathering,

Oh! my house is far away;
Yet it sometimes shuts me in.
Imperfection mars each day
While the perfect works begin.
In the house of labor best
Can I build the house of rest.
-Julia Ward Howe

Source: She Wields a Pen: American Women Poets of the Nineteenth Century (University of Iowa Press, 1997)

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