Posted in Family and Society, Life, Quotes, Reflections, Stories Around the World

Hold on to “the Cloak”

“There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self.” Ernest Hemingway

While putting together the events and details for the Christmas program at the work place, finesse and tact was required while bringing out the various talents (obvious or hidden) present in colleagues, seniors and juniors alike. As each one had volunteered their various acts, from solo vocals or music to the Christmas choir, play and message; the underlying talents were brought to light. While some were good, few were exquisite as the rehearsal audience was charmed by the music, song and talk. Surprisingly, the best of the talented were the ones who didn’t wax eloquent but showed their creative side with poise, charm and humility.

“…talent means nothing, while experience, acquired in humility and with hard work, means everything.” Patrick Süskind

Deeply introspecting the social life of today, one is often listing own achievements either as an open declaration, bragging or defending their glory; instead of growing and perfecting these talents. When social performance and creativity costs humaneness, kindness and humility, it is time to retrospect and learn from the centuries of time where greatness actually lies. As Rick Warren had said, “True humility is not thinking less of yourself; it is thinking of yourself less.” Each one is blessed in their own way, holding their own repertoire of skills, creativity and art. While one is not better than the other; being really good at something doesn’t require one to wear a placard on them declaring the same. Along with own skill and work; the character within speaks the loudest. As the short anecdote experienced by one of the actors of Indian cinema had narrated, the way we behave speaks a lot louder than what one says. True humility is when we acknowledge that there is always something new to learn and perfecting oneself, regardless of the achievements of the present.

“I have three precious things which I hold fast and prize. The first is gentleness; the second is frugality; the third is humility, which keeps me from putting myself before others. Be gentle and you can be bold; be frugal and you can be liberal; avoid putting yourself before others and you can become a leader among men.” Lao Tzu

Amitabh Bacchan says…”At the peak of my career, I was once travelling by plane. The passenger next to me was elderly gentleman dressed in a simple shirt and pants. He appeared to be middle class, and well educated. Other passengers perhaps recognising who I was, but this gentleman appeared to be unconcerned of my presence… He was reading his paper, looking out of the window, and when tea was served, he sipped it quietly. Trying to strike a conversation with him I smiled. The man courteously smiled back and said ‘Hello’. We got talking and I brought up the subject of cinema and movies and asked, ‘Do you watch films?’ The man replied, ‘Oh, very few. I did see one many years ago.’ I mentioned that I worked in the movie industry. The man replied..” oh, that’s nice. What do you do?’ I replied, ‘I am an actor ‘ The man nodded, ‘Oh, that’s wonderful!’ And that was it… When we landed, I held out my hand and said, ” It was good to travel with you. By the way, my name is Amitabh Bacchan !’ The man shook my hand and smiled, “Thank you… nice to have met you..I am J. R. D. Tata!”I learned on.that day that no matter how big you think you are, there is always someone *bigger*. Be humble, it costs nothing.
(Source: The Internet and Social Networks. While some articles say, it was the actor Amitabh Bacchan, others say it was the famous actor Dilip Kumar. Regardless of the actor, it was behaviour of the Great Indian personality J.R.D. Tata which teaches one about humility.)

Posted in Family and Society, Life, poetry, Quotes, Reflections

Gain the “Happy Feet”

“Memphis: Whatcha doing there, boy?
Mumble: I’m happy, Pa.
Memphis: Whatcha doing with your feet?
Mumble: They’re happy, too.”
(Dialogue, Happy Feet (2006))

With the weekend gone by, the after effect of movie night saw a number of penguins popping up as cartoons, drawings, flapping of wings and the tapping of feet, all done by the toddler in the house. The current penguin fascination was the consequence of “Happy Feet (2006)” night, a story revolving around penguins, tap dancing, music, fishing and humans.

What struck in the heart, as the movie scenes flashed intermittently in the mind, was the potential of what one can do as long as we find our feet and let it carry us through the path. For every step that the foot places, it takes us somewhere; but when the feet stay idle time moves on and the path is never travelled.

“A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step.” Lao Tzu

As one looks over the years, true potential can never be realized only by speculating but by taking the first step as well. While for every step, there may be a thousand doubts, fears, worries and anxiety of the future; it is taking that first step and doing what one loves that makes all the difference.

To find one’s true form, one has to learn to dance, walk, run, fall down and climb out; all done so as a part of life. It may take time to attain the perfect dream, but going ahead in small steps with feet firm on ground, along the path would help us find the dreams and above all, be contented from within. Dreams do make a big part of life, but finding them and losing out on the happiness, peace, love and contentment doesn’t make way for happy days. As the pictures of penguins and waddle walks are doing their rounds in the house, one is reminded of being happy and finding contentment in life of the present.

“The mind can go in a thousand directions, but on this beautiful path, I walk in peace. With each step, the wind blows. With each step, a flower blooms.” Thich Nhat Hanh

What Have I Done With My Feet
Melissa Bachara

What have I done with my feet?

They have been here as long as I remember
Carrying me soundly
To Kindergarten when I was only five
Despite my fear and tight black patent leather shoes.

What have I done with my feet?

Soft and strong,
They frolicked with me across summertime grass
Until they blended into the hues of green
They cleaned up just fine in a Mr. Bubble bath
Despite what my mother said.

What have I done with my feet?

They danced in my first shiny high-heeled shoes
With a boy whose face I vaguely remember
Who held me close and made me feel beautiful
Despite stepping on my feet now and then.

What have I done with my feet?

In white canvas Converse All-Stars
They boarded a plane to Texas
Ready to help me walk down bigger roads
Despite my small town roots and the $200 in my pocket.

What have I done with my feet?

Nails polished to perfection,
They carried me down the white aisle
Never tripping over my fears
Despite their knowledge that I was trading
My independence for a compromise

What have I done with my feet?

I stand at the beginning of a new and foreign road,
Baggage up to my ears and looking for my feet
Immobile, I wait for those reliable feet to move me forward
Despite my doubts and reservations
Knowing I will move forward

If only I could find my feet.

(Poetry Forum, December 29, 2003)

 

Posted in Daily, Family and Society, Life, Quotes, Random Thoughts

Of Roses and Thorns

An unexpected meeting with a friend of the previous workplace at the hospital, had lead to a short chat over a cup of tea. While enlisting the difficulties she had encountered on the home front and professional front, she had a lot to brood over and take over a negative vibe. Surprisingly her attitude and outlook was more of hopeful, than what would mine have been, if I were in her shoes. Facing life daily with a husband who has been bedridden (victim of a drunk driving accident), diagnosed with SLE, holding temporary jobs with children still in school are just few of the problems that were tackled. While holding the fort with an optimistic outlook outlook is difficult, the fact that she and many more like do it, is what gives a new meaning to positive approach in life.

“People who are too optimistic seem annoying. This is an unfortunate misinterpretation of what an optimist really is.

An optimist is neither naive, nor blind to the facts, nor in denial of grim reality. An optimist believes in the optimal usage of all options available, no matter how limited. As such, an optimist always sees the big picture. How else to keep track of all that’s out there? An optimist is simply a proactive realist.

An idealist focuses only on the best aspects of all things (sometimes in detriment to reality); an optimist strives to find an effective solution. A pessimist sees limited or no choices in dark times; an optimist makes choices.

When bobbing for apples, an idealist endlessly reaches for the best apple, a pessimist settles for the first one within reach, while an optimist drains the barrel, fishes out all the apples and makes pie.
Annoying? Yes. But, oh-so tasty!”
-Vera Nazarian, The Perpetual Calendar of Inspiration

Making sense of optimism is never easy from another point of view. One of the aspects of keeping an optimistic outlook to life is to find an approach which encompasses an effective way out of the problems. For those who can do it in a subtle manner, while at the same time not fail to appreciate the gifts of life and its beauty are the true teachers of “optimism”. As taught and drilled into the mind, from a very young age, life isn’t a bed of roses. But what one must remember at all accounts is that, for every thorn along the way, the final destination holds a rose. While there mayn’t be a bed of roses for everyone, nothing stops one from rising above the thorns, appreciating the beauty and fragrance of the roses; for such is life.

Posted in Daily, Life, Personal Musings, poetry, Reflections

“Gains” by the Storm

No pain. No gain.

The saying as above, has been drummed into us from childhood and carried over to the adult lives. While the early days may have left us wallowing to it’s reality, while those peers from the rich, social backgrounds get “everything easy” as the rest slogs it out, adult life brings out the saying in its true form. As the years mature, one gives their best shot and bear the fruit of it in due immediate course of time never comes along. What happens to one, when despite all the pain, gain is absent ?

“It is only in sorrow bad weather masters us; in joy we face the storm and defy it.”  Amelia Barr

Those times, when all the pains seem fruitless and drain us of the mental hope, one needs to keep their inner flame going. Gathering courage to master the raging storm isn’t easy, but once we pull it out from within; surviving the storm would be the gain from the pain. On those days or times, when the pain hasn’t borne fruit; knowing and redefining the “gain” is what keeps the hope going. Though the immediate gain mayn’t be what is as perceived; handling the storm and crossing it is, at times, the biggest gain of all.

“You can be in the storm, but don’t let the storm get in you.” Joel Osteen

Storms
Margie DeMerell

There will be storms, child
There will be storms
And with each tempest
You will seem to stand alone
Against cruel winds

But with time, the rage and fury
Shall subside
And when the sky clears
You will find yourself
Clinging to someone
You would have never known
But for storms.

“Dig deep & pull the roots of confidence from the ground of your being, standing firm in the raging storm until sunlight blossoms inside you.” Curtis Tyrone Jones

Posted in Life, Personal Musings, Quotes, Random Thoughts, Stories Around the World

Weave of the Ribbon

“It’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years.” Abe Lincoln

Unexpected news or shockers from what was previously imagined as real can give a jolt to the person when understanding hits the surface. Yet when it does happens, how one reacts or rather how all of us react, makes the biggest difference.

35 years male. Single. Known case of thalassemia major. On blood transfusions since age of six years. Recurrent infections. HIV ELISA positive.

40 years female. Recurrent infections since the past year. Atypical pneumonia. Disease profiles variable. HIV ELISA positive.

7 year old male.  Recurrent oral candidiasis. Recent diagnosed pulmonary tuberculosis. HIV ELISA and PCR positive.

These above cases are not even close to the tip of the iceberg of the damage caused by what was originally believed to be the mutated form of the wild virus in non-human primates. Rising to global pandemic proportions, the origins are traced to as early as 1910 wherein probably the wild virus underwent mutations to the present form by series of changes ranging from suppression of the innate and internal immune response, high-risk transmission channels as well as social and environmental changes leading to the rapid spread of the mutated virus form. Though the earliest well-documented case of HIV in a human was done in 1959, the clinical cluster of cases (1981) in the United States with rare types of pneumonia (symptoms of Pneumocystis carinii pneumonia (PCP)) and rise of previously rare skin cancer called Kaposi’s sarcoma (KS) prompted the CDC to develop a task force to control the outbreak. With these opportunistic infections being more prevalent in the hemophiliacs, drug users, certain endemic areas and social or sexual preferences; the task force stepped up the ante and the term AIDS was coined and brought to the forefront of the mass public.

From Ryan White to Greg Louganis or Magic Johnson and many numerous people, each of them had fought their battle with the disease of HIV/AIDS. Whether it was by their circumstances or series of unfortunate events, the questions and chaotic thoughts every person or loved one goes through on hearing the positive confirmation is the plenty of “why me’s” and the uncertainty of the future, disease progress and implications on the personal, professional as well as mental front. None of us realize the reality behind the scene, unless we step into the other’s shoes and walk a couple of miles. Only then the false pictures get morphed with those little details that help one to realize the truth was far from what was initially perceived.

“You cannot hope to build a better world without improving the individuals. To that end,each of us must work for our own improvement and, at the same time, share a general responsibility for all humanity, our particular duty being to aid those to whom we think can be most useful.” Marie Curie

As the global battle continues on multiple fronts, from raising awareness to finding solutions and reparative measures for the ongoing myriad of symptoms and disease complex, society in general as to sit up and take note. Ignorance may be bliss for now, but it always comes at a heavy price. Neither does guilt, accusations or pointing fingers help any. But awareness doesn’t hurt anyone. Instead it helps to build for a better tomorrow. The resilience of mankind lies in the ability to pick the battle and choose wise. Linking the goals for the common future would help for the days of tomorrow.

“A man only begins to be a man when he ceases to whine and revile, and commences to search for the hidden justice which regulates his life. And he adapts his mind to that regulating factor, he ceases to accuse others as the cause of his condition, and builds himself up in strong and noble thoughts; ceases to kick against circumstances, but begins to use them as aids to his more rapid progress, and as a means of the hidden powers and possibilities within himself.” James Allen (As a Man Thinketh)

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Posted in Family and Society, Personal Musings, poetry, Random Thoughts

A bit of the Pebble or Clod ?!

“Your reality is as you perceive it to be. So, it is true, that by altering this perception we can alter our reality.” William Constantine

When one of my friends had received a promotion, the catch was the transfer attached to it. During the last meet, which was both a farewell and treat; we had asked her about the family. For her, family of four, relocating the kids to a new school would be difficult and transfer for her husband wasn’t an option. The new place being four hour drive, regular travel wasn’t an option. On asked, how would she manage; pat came the reply, it’s just for a couple of months and then things will fall into place. It was refreshing to feel the optimistic and practical approach.

“The difference between a mountain and a molehill is your perspective.” Al Neuharth

A lot many time, one often encounters many situation not to personal liking or choice. While at times, one does feel a bit trod on and over whelmed, sticking on and staying true is a matter of principle, perspective and perception. Situations do change like the wind, but it’s how one masters them with the right perspective that makes the approach different. To whine and grumble; or buckle up and forge a new way ahead, is all in the mind, beliefs and actions. The wind blows either for or against, depending on the position we stand in. When the wind becomes a tempest; learning to bend and flow helps one to find their feet in the aftermath.

“We must look at the lens through which we see the world, as well as the world we see, and that the lens itself shapes how we interpret the world.” Stephen R. Covey

The Clod and the Pebble
By William Blake
“Love seeketh not itself to please,
Nor for itself hath any care,
But for another gives its ease,
And builds a Heaven in Hell’s despair.”

So sung a little Clod of Clay
Trodden with the cattle’s feet,
But a Pebble of the brook
Warbled out these metres meet:

“Love seeketh only self to please,
To bind another to its delight,
Joys in another’s loss of ease,
And builds a Hell in Heaven’s despite.”

“I am still determined to be cheerful and to be happy in whatever situation. I may be, for I have also learnt from experience that the greater part of our happiness or misery depends upon our dispositions and not upon our circumstances.” Martha Washington

Posted in Life, Personal Musings, Quotes, Stories Around the World, Work

Alone or With A Leaf

“In the depth of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer.” Albert Camus

The absence of my toddler at the table for his allotted cartoon time, had sent me to the garden. With the rains and the winds still lashing on though in a minimal way, I was mentally prepared to see him in mud. Surprisingly, I found him by the small pond (covered with a strapped wire mesh thankfully) with a little leaf complete with a long stalk in hand. On closer view, he was gently prodding two tortoises to reach their temporary home soon, before the night fall. While one with the help of the “leaf” had reached the pond soon; the other had almost managed on it’s own. With both of them safely in their home, the wide smile on the young face was worth the muddy shirt.

“Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try Again. Fail again. Fail better.” Samuel Beckett

All of us have our own moments, of being “the tortoise” or “the child”. Wherein, one may need the extra support to go ahead or one has been the provider of that extra support. On the other hand, there have been many who have been in the shoes of the tortoise without that help. Each step was taken with effort, not calculating or finding the prospects in the future; but going about the task and dealing with each aspect along the way.

“At the very moment when people underestimate you is when you can make a breakthrough.”? Germany Kent

Once one has crossed the finish line, on looking back, the feeling of awe, relief, happiness, contentment and thanksgiving all come rolled in one. Later as one dissects the situation, the realization comes that all things are possible, no matter how big it may seem; as long as we keep the self belief and start tackling it, no matter how small the step may seem to be. No sculpture is made one blow alone, but by series of continued chipping to create the many planes, inclinations, curves and angles for the final effect. Our lives reflect a lot similar. Help or no help, once we start moving, one reaches the end point sooner than just twiddling the thumbs or flapping around. Beauty in life as such, is experienced only after a wee little effort on own part.

“You may be the only person left who believes in you, but it’s enough. It takes just one star to pierce a universe of darkness. Never give up.” Richelle E. Goodrich

A Determined Spirit
Author Unknown

Once upon a time, a small bird named Tasoo lived in a vast jungle. One hot summer day, a terrible wildfire erupted and the flames devoured many trees and animals living in the jungle. Other birds flew high into the sky and far away to safety, but Tasoo couldn’t bear to leave her precious jungle home to burn. Day and night, she flew with all her might back and forth to the river, filling her tiny beak with water to drop on the raging fires. Tasoo’s rare heart of courage and unshakable determination moved the heavenly gods to shed tears, and a great rain poured down upon the jungle, extinguishing the flames. And so it is that even the smallest actions of a determined spirit can change the world.
(Popular parable of the Quechua (Incan) Indians of South America)