Tag: mental health

Posted in Family and Society, Life, Personal Musings, poetry, Quotes, Work

Defining Achievement

Posted on by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

From the cradle and over the growing years of school, education be it academics, sports or extracurricular always speak of making something out of one’s life. The achievements may be possible in any field that one loves or chooses to be in. Slowly as one evolves from childhood, through adolescence and young adulthood, the realization strikes that achievement or accomplishments encompasses numerous things, from concept to realistic purposes and materialistic targets. Yet eventually what matters the most is the inner self.

“If you were born without wings, do nothing to prevent them from growing.” Coco Chanel

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Excellence in a chosen field or the given talent is a definite must. But the right chords are struck not only by scoring laurels, but also by finding oneself in the process. The scales have to be balanced between personal and professional life; between social life, friends, family as well as find personal time to grow, develop and progress.

“The roots of true achievement lie in the will to become the best that you can become.” Harold Taylor

While achievements and accomplishments are important in life; it varies depending on how one defines it. While for some accomplishment means writing a book, owning vintage cars or running an organization; for others it lie in running the family and the household or being in the garden. Let each one to their respective own. As the adage goes, “too much of honey causes unrest”, the same lies with how we live our lives. One knows when the balance is right, once when the inner peace blossoms. True achievements bring out the happiness and peace within. The latter is what makes life all the more precious and worth the while.

“I think self-discovery is the greatest achievement in life, because once you discover yourself and accept what you are, then you can fulfil your true potential and be happy.” Marco Pierre White

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The Art of Achievement
You hold in your hand the camel’s-hair brush of a painter of Life. You stand before the vast white canvas of Time.
The paints are your thoughts, emotions and acts.
You select the colours of your thoughts; drab or bright, weak or strong, good or bad.
You select the colours of your emotions; discordant or harmonious, harsh or quiet, weak or strong.
You select the colours of your acts; cold or warm, fearful or daring, small or big.
You visualize yourself as the person you want to be.
You strive to make the ideal in your mind become a reality on the canvas of Time.
Each moment of your life is a brush stroke in the painting of your growing career.
There are the bold, sweeping strokes of one increasing, dynamic purpose.
There are the lights and shadows that make your life deep and strong.
There are the little touches that add the stamp of character and worth.
The art of achievement is the art of making life – your life – a masterpiece.
Wilferd A. Peterson

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Posted in Daily, Family and Society, Life, Personal Musings, Quotes, Reflections, Stories Around the World

Altering the Echoes

Posted on by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are.” Anais Nin

Working in an organization, one never realizes how much their actions and behaviour speaks out louder than the words they say. The former influence the opinion of others around oneself more than the latter. From a purely retrospective philosophical point, the behavior met to oneself is in parts an echo of how one behaves towards others. Although kindness should be echoed in thought, behaviour and actions at all times; one goes the extra mile to be kind to those who make them feel the same.

“All the people sent to us are our reflection. And they are sent so that we, looking at these people, correct our mistakes, and when we correct them, these people either change too or leave our lives.” Boris Pasternak

Source:https://vk.com/thesemagicmoments
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Source:https://vk.com/thesemagicmoments

While the tendency to put the fault on the other side of the fence is high especially when pertaining to wrong behaviour; the “why it happened” part may have something to do with what was done by the receiver of the deed some time before. True that people make mistakes and change over; but the consequence of the previous actions still leave an after effect felt sooner or later. To man up and face them, reflects the “new and real character of the person involved”. As one learns to correct themselves from the situations that mirror their own faults; learning to forgive, forget and accept the echoes returned helps one move forward on in life, making new memories and leaving clear and better footprints behind.

“Life is an echo. What you send out comes back. What you sow, you reap. What you give, you get. What you see in others, exists in you.” Zig Ziglar

Source:https://vk.com/thesemagicmoments
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There is a story about a father and his young son who were walking through the mountains. Suddenly, the son fell, hurting his leg on a rock. He screamed, ‘AAhhhh!’ To his surprise, he heard a voice repeating, ‘AAhhhh!’ This made him even more curious. So, he yelled, ‘Who are you?’ Back came the same answer, ‘Who are you?’Feeling a bit perturbed by this response, he yelled out, ‘Coward!’ Back came the same reply, ‘Coward!’

He looked at his father and asked: ‘What’s going on?’ His father smiled and said: ‘Son, pay attention.’Looking across the valley, his father yelled to the mountain, ‘I admire you!’ The voice answered: ‘I admire you!’ Again the man cried out: ‘You are a champion!’ The voice replied, ‘You are a champion!’ The boy was amazed, but he was very confused. So, his father explained…

‘You are only hearing an echo, the sound of our voices bouncing back from the mountains. However, this really is how life works. It returns to you what you think, say and do! Our lives are a reflection of our thoughts and actions. If you want more love in your world, create more love in your heart. If you want to be treated with kindness, treat others with kindness. If you want more competence on your team, become more competent.
This relationship applies to everything, in all aspects of life. Life will give to you, everything you give to it, only it will give you even more in return. Your life is not ever a coincidence. Each moment is a reflection of you!’ The son listened and grew in understanding, and through the following years, he witnessed the truth of these words in his life!
Author Unknown (Source:vk.com)

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Posted in Family and Society, Life, Personal Musings, poetry, Quotes, Reflections

Reality….Over The Years

Posted on by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“A person is formed by experiences. The past is a blind sculptor. To deny that artist his masterwork is to mock your own experience.” Jim Starlin

One of the biggest reality checks of being an adult is that one has to battle with a host of consequences, decisions, situations and regrets often moving along as a chain of sorts. At times, they may not be in one’s hands but a lot dependent as an outcome of the actions of others. Yet those actions incite the reaction in one, which has the drastic consequences. Thereby the cycle gets initiated and events set in motion.

“The truth is, we all face hardships of some kind, and you never know the struggles a person is going through. Behind every smile, there’s a story of a personal struggle.” Adrienne C. Moore

Source:https://vk.com/thesemagicmoments
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Source:https://vk.com/thesemagicmoments

Reality is, no matter how hard one tries; how careful or pleasant one attempts to be, there are bound to be many “ups” and “downs” in the short time that we have on earth. The way how one handles them and moves on, is what matters the most. While sometimes we may be able to figure out things or set a pattern; there would be never be a hard and fast rule that would ensure everything would be done by the right way.

“He who knows no hardships will know no hardihood. He who faces no calamity will need no courage. Mysterious though it is, the characteristics in human nature which we love best grow in a soil with a strong mixture of troubles.” Harry Emerson Fosdick

The beauty of time, is that it helps us to grow and learn from the past for the future. Mistakes or struggles, at times in a similar manner may happen time and again, but learning to overcome them makes all the difference. As proved through the tests of time over centuries and as history has shown man; eventually we will overcome and things would make sense at the end; as long as one never loses hope.

“And then things would be fine. Then I’d be fine.” Sarah J. Maas

Source:https://vk.com/thesemagicmoments
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Life
As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn’t supposed to ever let you down probably will.
You will have your heart broken probably more than once and it’s harder every time.
You’ll break hearts too, so remember how it felt when yours was broken.
You’ll fight with your best friend.
You’ll blame a new love for things an old one did.
You’ll cry because time is passing too fast, and you’ll eventually lose someone you love.
So take too many pictures, laugh too much, and love like you’ve never been hurt because every sixty seconds you spend upset is a minute of happiness you’ll never get back.
Don’t be afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin.
Author Unknown

Source:https://vk.com/thesemagicmoments
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Posted in Daily, Life, Personal Musings, poetry, Quotes, Work

From Sand to Pearl

Posted on by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“Nobody is exempt from the trials of life, but everyone can always find something positive in everything even in the worst of times.” Roy T. Bennett

Imagine waking up on the busy week days with no electricity in the house. From breakfast to lunch to be made ready and ironing not possible; the day starts off with a feeling of incompleteness marked by irritation. While commuting, the long unexpected long traffic jams increases the probability of being late for the kid’s school as well as office, driving the sense of irritation stronger and higher. Other instances like waiting for the teller in the long queue, till the point when it is one’s turn, midday break is due; or when during major retail and wholesale shopping queues are merged when cash counter machines default; or when one is stuck in the elevator, getting late for a meeting and a power outage happens. There are many more instances that can fill a page, wherein one is forced to bitten by the irritation bug and is helpless to do anything about it.

“If you are irritated by every rub, how will you be polished?” Rumi

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Source:https://vk.com/public138314547
Source:https://vk.com/public138314547

What one fails to realize many a time, is that although the situation may be beyond our control, the reaction to it is in our hands. Being human, the feel of irritation will happen; yet how to face it, use it, temper it down and master the situation to one’s benefit will go a long way in changing the entire scenario, either in the short or the long run. Like the fire that brightens the silver and gold; one can get better of the common day hindrances. Those situations that may initially seem like a blight on the day, can be worked out and later be used to refine oneself to become a better human.

“I’ve found that worry and irritation vanish into thin air the moment I open my mind to the many blessings i possess.” Dale Carnegie

Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
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Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts

The Oyster
There once was an oyster whose story I tell,
who found that some sand had got into his shell.

It was only a grain, but it gave him great pain,
for oysters have feelings although they’re so plain.

Now, did he berate the harsh workings of fate
that brought him to such a deplorable state?

Did he curse at the government, cry for election,
and claim that the sea should have given him protection?

No – he said to himself as he lay on a shell,
since I cannot remove it I shall try to improve it.

Now the years have rolled around, as the years always do.
and he came to his ultimate destiny, a stew.

And the small grain of sand that had bothered him so,
was a beautiful pearl all richly aglow.

Now the tale has a moral, for isn’t it grand,
what an oyster can do with a morsel of sand?

What couldn’t we do if we’d only begin,
with some of the things that get under our skin?

Author Unknown

Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
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Photo by Dmitry Zvolskiy on Pexels.com
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Posted in Daily, Life, Personal Musings, poetry

Reality of the Frequent “Cannot”

Posted on by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“Opportunities will come and go, but if you do nothing about them, so will you.” Richie Norton

One of the most frequently encountered on assigning any project at the high school age group is the word “can’t”. Those “cannot”s revolve around the excuses of lack of time, to increased work load, less fun time, more effort required and so on. The resonance of “cannot”s increases almost in proportional to the effort or inconvenience caused. While in school life, “the cannot”s are heard maximum when asked to help in household chores, baby sit, accompany on hospital visits or grocery shopping; adult life “cannot”s echo almost a similar vein albeit largely increasing the responsibility level.

Source:https://vk.com/neverbbetter
Source:https://vk.com/neverbbetter Source:https://vk.com/neverbbetter Source:https://vk.com/jpgpicture

“Whenever you are asked if you can do a job, tell ’em, ‘Certainly I can!’ Then get busy and find out how to do it.” Theodore Roosevelt

Little does one realize the potential havoc caused by that word or emotion “can’t”. From an opportunity to learn or do something new, grow in responsibility, bond together, chance on new avenue of opportunities and so on; are all lost at that single word “can’t”. While can’t may be really necessary at certain points in life; frequently indulging them will result in more loss than gain in the long run.

“Never say that you can’t do something, or that something seems impossible, or that something can’t be done, no matter how discouraging or harrowing it may be; human beings are limited only by what we allow ourselves to be limited by: our own minds. We are each the masters of our own reality; when we become self-aware to this: absolutely anything in the world is possible. Master yourself, and become king of the world around you. Let no odds, chastisement, exile, doubt, fear, or ANY mental virii prevent you from accomplishing your dreams. Never be a victim of life; be it’s conqueror.” Mike Norton

Source:https://vk.com/jpgpicture
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Can’t
Can’t is the worst word that’s written or spoken;
Doing more harm here than slander and lies;
On it is many a strong spirit broken,
And with it many a good purpose dies.
It springs from the lips of the thoughtless each morning
And robs us of courage we need through the day:
It rings in our ears like a timely sent warning
And laughs when we falter and fall by the way.

Can’t is the father of feeble endeavour,
The parent of terror and half hearted work;
It weakens the efforts of artisans clever,
And makes of the toiler an indolent shirk.
It poisons the soul of the man with a vision,
It stifles in infancy many a plan;
It greets honest toiling with open derision
And mocks at the hopes and the dreams of a man.

Can’t is a word none should speak without blushing;
To utter it should be a symbol of shame;
Ambition and courage it daily is crushing;
It blights a man’s purpose and shortens his aim.
Despise it with all of your hatred of error;
Refuse it the lodgement it seeks in your brain;
Arm against it as a creature of terror,
And all that you dream of you someday shall gain.

Can’t is the word that is for to ambition,
An enemy ambushed to shatter your will;
Its prey is forever the man with a mission
And bows but to courage and patience and skill.
Hate it, with hatred that’s deep and undying,
For once it is welcomed ’twill break any man;
Whatever the goal you are seeking, keep trying
and answer this demon by saying: ‘I can.’
-Edgar A. Guest

Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
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Source:https://vk.com/neverbbetter Source:https://vk.com/neverbbetter Source:https://vk.com/jpgpicture
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Posted in Family and Society, Life, Personal Musings, Reflections, Stories Around the World, Work

Making the Best Of

Posted on by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“Every experience in your life is being orchestrated to teach you something you need to know to move forward.” Brian Tracy

One of the very common teachings or saying passed on from one generation to the next, especially when hitting road blocks in life are the words “to make the best out of the bad situation”. On hindsight, once when one has landed on other side of the situation, the thought strikes that every “bad situation” has brought out a different side of oneself. Interestingly, whether the “different side” is for the better or the worse depends on oneself alone.

“A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.” Winston S. Churchill

 

Source:https://vk.com/thesemagicmoments
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Source:https://vk.com/thesemagicmoments

Have you ever observed a lone ant moving on the ground? When it’s path is blocked, it finds a way around it, scurrying towards the intended or alternate direction somehow. Looking through he glasses of “life”, may of us like these ants are forced to find alternate routes to get to the final point. No matter how big the hindrances may seem, time and life forces one to move on, despite the inner resistance to change from the “deemed normalcy”. As one changes the directions pertaining to the situation, a series of effects are created which when done with the right will, manner, intent and effort will aid in achieving better than what was expected by self or by the world around us. Instead of simply making best of the bad situation; let the “worst situation” bring out the hidden best of ourselves.

“The outcome is not up to you. The outlook is.” Germany Kent

 

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On another occasion, talking to a friend who was concerned about Salmon P. Chase’s ambition for the presidency, and who thought Lincoln should ask Chase to resign, Lincoln observed that Chase’s department was functioning very well, and as long as it continued to do so he would not worry about Chase’s presidential aspirations. The situation reminded him of a time when he and his step-brother were plowing a corn field in Indiana, he driving the horse and his step-brother guiding the plow. The horse, naturally lazy and slow, suddenly rushed across the field so fast the boys could hardly keep pace with him. On reaching the end of the furrow, Lincoln discovered an enormous chin fly fastened to the horse and knocked it off. His step-brother asked why he did that; whereupon Lincoln explained that he didn’t want the horse bitten. “But,” protested his step-brother, “that’s all that made him go!” “Now,” said Lincoln, “if Mr. Chase has a presidential chin fly biting him, I’m not going to knock it off if it will only make his department go.”
Source: Lincoln’s Humour: An Analysis. Benjamin P. Thomas. Journal of the Abraham Lincoln Association. Volume 3, Issue 1, 1981, pp. 28-47

“There is always a solution to any problem. Find opportunities in any circumstance. Never become a victim.” Lailah Gifty Akita

 

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Posted in Daily, Family and Society, Personal Musings, Quotes, Stories Around the World, Work

The Way We Phrase Them

Posted on by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“But words are things, and a small drop of ink,
Falling like dew, upon a thought, produces
That which makes thousands, perhaps millions, think.”
– George Gordon, Lord Byron

Reasoning with a child especially of the preschool years, or getting out of their earnest request for their wishes is never easy. The reason being simply is the way they put across their choices with words. From the initial demand of “I want that” to requests pleading “may I please have it” to outright tantrums and then finally the round-about way. The latter is the most difficult one to get out of. The “round-about” ways include “If I would get that new cycle, then I’ll be able to spend less television time and more play”, “new roller blades translates as more exercise” or “the more ice cream and the more veggies trade” and so on. During most of these occasions, what strikes me as most remarkable is their way with words as they put across what they want.

“You can change the course of your life with your words.” Anonymous

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The age old conflict of the “pen or the sword being mighty”, it’s the essence of the words that have the power over both. The way we say things have a powerful effect. While positive words leave a good feeling behind, besides changing many perspectives for the better along the way; negative words can have a drastic impact as well. For instance the negative emotions especially at the work place; to put across one’s anger, from direct hurtful words to pointed polite reminders or snide remarks, there are different ways to express out the emotion. Although in doing so, the task may or mayn’t be done; but more than that the bitter taste of the words have the potency to darken the mood of the day. What we say matters. The way we say matters. The “how” we say matters.

“If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his language, that goes to his heart.” Nelson Mandela

For those days, when we think silence speaks louder than words; at times they may do; but when those words which should be spoken aren’t said, misunderstandings may happen, sometimes reversible; or not. It’s so easy to break, but difficult to repair whether they be people, time or relationships.

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Source:https://vk.com/veruj
Source:https://vk.com/veruj

Words when born out of concern, kindness, humaneness, love and understanding have the brightness to turn the most stark, dull or difficult occasions into stepping stones as well bring courage to brave the darkness and survive. Yet words when in haste, when in anger, thoughtless or out of tune to the situation and scenario, have the potential to destroy and impair beyond the perceived boundaries.

Words and communication are a gift. While on one hand we have the gift of the using the right words at the right times, the other deep end is either ceaseless chatter, verbal diarrhea, thoughtless and hurtful talk. Being at both ends, that of the sender and the receiver, will teach us through experience and lessons that words can change one’s live, no matter how small or big it may be.

“For me, words are a form of action, capable of influencing change. Their articulation represents a complete, lived experience.” Ingrid Bengis

SourcE:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
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One day a blind man was sitting on the steps of a building with a hat near his feet and a sign saying: “I am blind, please help.”
One person passed by and stopped. He saw a disabled person who had only a few coins in his hat. He threw him a couple of coins and, without his permission, wrote new words on the tablet. He left her a blind man and left.
By the end of the day, he returned and saw that the hat was full of coins. The blind man recognized him step by step and asked if he was the person who had rewritten the tablet. The blind also wanted to know exactly what he wrote. He replied:
– Nothing that would be wrong. I just wrote it a little differently.
He smiled and left.
A new inscription on the plate was: “It’s spring now, but I can’t see it.”

“There is something about words. In expert hands, manipulated deftly, they take you prisoner. Wind themselves around your limbs like spider silk, and when you are so enthralled you cannot move, they pierce your skin, enter your blood, numb your thoughts. Inside you they work their magic.” Diane Setterfield

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