Tag: mental health

Posted in Daily, Family and Society, Life, poetry, Quotes, Reflections

At the Next Chapter

Posted on by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“Attitude is a choice. Happiness is a choice. Optimism is a choice. Kindness is a choice. Giving is a choice. Respect is a choice. Whatever choice you make makes you. Choose wisely.” Roy T. Bennett

With one of the extended members of the family entering into the “college” phase of their life, stepping out of the “home nest” becomes a must in order to enter the accepted college. As the young adolescent enters the “independent phase” maturing into the young adult; adapting to the new environment, doing well both in academics and social life, making wise decisions and moving on comfortably in life is the prayer in the mind of every family elder, especially parents.

“Do what is right, not what is easy nor what is popular.” Roy T. Bennett

Source:https://vk.com/public75290000
Source:https://vk.com/public75290000
Source:https://vk.com/public75290000

Being solely independent for the first time in college life may be slightly scary where one is uncertain of the next step or what may happen. Yet staying true to the own conscience, doing right, being fair, understanding, kind as well as practical helps in the transition from home to college. Meeting various fellow individuals with different perspectives and personalities may seem a bit daunting at first, especially for the pure introverts. Yet believe in oneself and the goodness of life; things mayn’t seem so difficult then. Situations will arise, judgement and opinions will be made, either within or out loud by society. Be kind when judging for those shoes may be worn by oneself at some other point of life.

“Judge tenderly, if you must. There is usually a side you have not heard, a story you know nothing about, and a battle waged that you are not having to fight.” Traci Lea Larussa

Source:https://vk.com/pepheads
Source:https://vk.com/neverbebetter
Source:https://vk.com/neverbebetter

Be kind. Be just. Think well. Do one’s own best. Be prepared for the worst. When yours truly had attended college and “dorm life” for the first life, these were the first few pieces of advice received. Following these basic guidelines will help later in life as well. Life is there to make memories, receive new teachings, learn, undergo experiences to remember as well as to make mistakes, forgive and learn from the “bad moments”. The journey is complete when one learns to use the downhills to view the uphills. The path was never easy but that’s what makes the travel beautiful and meaningful.

“Life is about accepting the challenges along the way, choosing to keep moving forward, and savoring the journey.” Roy T. Bennett

Source:https://vk.com/pepheads
Source:https://vk.com/neverbebetter

Going out into the world from the threshold of the earth
Do not deprive yourself of good thoughts, –
Do not judge strictly and unequivocally,
And do not rush down to look down.

Understand: maybe something did not understand
You’re in a strange, very difficult fate.
Or outta – in the pursuit of truth?
Did pride leap at you?

Maybe before you invade the soul,
You forgot to look in the eyes?
Very rarely we know how to listen,
Very few are able to endure.

Do not judge unequivocally and strictly –
Keep the joy of your heart.
Do not judge: we all walk under God,
All are His beloved children.
-Rus Svyataya

Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/pepheads
Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/neverbebetter
Source:https://vk.com/pepheads
Source:https://vk.com/neverbebetter
Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Posted in Daily, Family and Society, poetry, Reflections

From One Candle

Posted on by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“Those candle flames were like the lives of men. So fragile. So deadly. Left alone, they lit and warmed. Let run rampant, they would destroy the very things they were meant to illuminate. Embryonic bonfires, each bearing a seed of destruction so potent it could tumble cities and dash kings to their knees.” Brandon Sanderson

With constant power outages in the midst of the heavy rains (the latter being an affirmation of the monsoon season getting into it’s full swing); light and electricity, the essentials for daily living are often more “drained out” than available. Which is why, the alternative measures, ranging from generators to inverters, emergency lanterns and the like are made available to continue the daily life, uninterrupted, hassle free and comfortable, be it home, neighbourhood, office or an institute. Yet when the alternatives too run out after continuous long hours or even days of power outages, the two essentials to fall back on are the “sun-rays” and the “candle”. No matter how technologically advanced one becomes, at the end of the night, it’s the candle that throws some light; especially during power outages.

“Look at how a single candle can both defy and define the darkness.” Anne Frank

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com
Source:https://vk.com/thesemagicmoments
Source:https://vk.com/thesemagicmoments
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

The fascination in watching the flames of the candle flicker never dies out with time. The light as well as the direction of the flame, the shadow and patterns it casts are few of the many reasons why candles are still around. Most is the warmth reflected by a candle. At times, candles remind one of people in general. The spread of warmth and sharing of light makes the most aloof person glow and lights up the inner happiness. At the same time, when misused, lit wrong or without proper safety measures and precautions, candles have the capacity to light ablaze destroying everything in the process. The potential and power of a candle, like people, can never be underestimated. The more one grows optimism and love within; the more light is shared and like candles; warmth, happiness and joy is spread about. Even if one candle is lit, it can make a big difference in the world around it.

“Each time a person passes by you and you say ‘hello’, imagine that person turning into a candle. The more positivity, love and light you reflect, the more light is mirrored your way. Sharing beautiful hellos is the quickest way to earn spiritual brownie points. You should start seeing hellos as small declarations of faith. Every time you say hello to a stranger, your heart acknowledges over and over again that we are all family.” Suzy Kassem

Source:https://vk.com/thesemagicmoments
Source:https://vk.com/thesemagicmoments
Source:https://vk.com/thesemagicmoments
Source:https://vk.com/thesemagicmoments
Source:https://vk.com/thesemagicmoments

And People Went Out Like Candles

Sometimes, there is a longing in the evening,
But there is no soul near …
So people went out like candles …
They broke like pencils …

And they need just a little –
Support without prickly phrases,
Love is sensitive and trust in God …
And compassion for kind eyes …

Heartbreak was not noticed …
We are in a hurry about our business …
And people went out like candles …
They broke like pencils …

We do not need advice,
When longing is in the soul …
We need a drop of light in our heart,
When there is a hand in our hand …

A meeting with a loved one –
Saving the human soul …
People shone like candles …
They sharpened like pencils …

-Irina Samarin-Labyrinth
(Translated to English. Source: vk.com)

Photo by Valeria Boltneva on Pexels.com
Source:https://vk.com/thesemagicmoments
Source:https://vk.com/neverbebetter
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Source:https://vk.com/thesemagicmoments
Posted in Daily, Family and Society, Life, Quotes, Reflections, Stories Around the World

Circles, Time and Again…

Posted on by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“I drop kindness pebbles in still water everyday, and I watch the effect they have on other people’s lives. My favorite kindness pebbles are compliments. Drop a compliment and watch the ripple affect that it has in your life.” John A Passaro

Amidst the melee of living the modern life, very often one never stops to think of the far reaching impact of one’s actions, words and thoughts. Little does one realize that when one is really happy, it blooms from within silently triggering the “blooming effect” in those around them. Similarly with kindness. A single kind thought stems the anger or unrest growing within. That stemmed unrest is instead transformed to kind words, starting off a chain reaction that may or mayn’t end with the initiator. Although it mayn’t end in a full circle, the peaceful and mental calm that kindness leaves behind is worth the effort taken to practise a little bit of kindness daily.

Source:https://vk.com/pub_mdma
Source:https://vk.com/pub_mdma
Source:https://vk.com/pub_mdma

“Don’t look to others to give you happiness. Grow it within yourself and share it with the world around you. Bets are, if you give a bit of your happiness to the world, it will begin a ripple effect, and who knows how many other people you can help. It’s never too late to decide that your happiness (or whatever it is that you want) is yours to create and not the other way around.” Leigh Hershkovich

Time and time again, the existence of few laws of life that withstands the test of time has been proven. Among them, is the law of kindness; which like the ripples of a pebble dropped into water has consequences far reaching even after the initial ripple has faded away. The more one practises creating the “good ripples”, the more one experiences life to its’ fullest with the best moments that the latter offers.

“The help we give to others creates the ripple of good feeling we give to ourselves.” Gina Greenlee

Source:https://vk.com/pub_mdma
Source:https://vk.com/pub_mdma
Source:https://vk.com/pub_mdma
Source:https://vk.com/pub_mdma
Source:https://vk.com/pub_mdma

Once in a woman’s apartment a cactus bloomed. Prior to this, it was four years old, stuck on the windowsill, like a gloomy and unshaven janitor and suddenly such a surprise. In pleasant thoughts about a blooming cactus, she accidentally stepped on the foot of a gloomy man in the subway. She didn’t scream her remark as usual with an offended look. But smiled:
“Do not be angry with me, please, I had nothing to hold on to; if you like, you can step on my foot and we will be quits.” The grim man swallowed what he was going to voice about her. Then he went to his station and bought a newspaper. Instead of haggling the saleswoman, confused with the calculation of delivery or calling her stupid, he said to her: ” It’s okay, count again, I am not good at math either early in the morning.”
The saleswoman, who did not expect such a response, was deeply moved and gave free of charge two old magazines and a whole pile of old newspapers to an old man, a pensioner who was a regular customer, fond of reading but buying only one cheap newspaper every day.

A contented old man went home with an armful of newspapers and magazines. Having met a neighbor from the upper floor, he didn’t give her a daily talk on the topic: “your child is stomping around the apartment like an elephant and is preventing rest, it is necessary to bring up better”, but he looked and said: “Your daughter has grown. I don’t understand whom she is more like you or her father, but she will definitely be a fine lady.” The neighbor took the child to the garden, went to work at the reception and did not shout at the senseless grandmother who had signed up for an appointment with the doctor for yesterday, but came today. Instead she said,” Come on, don’t be upset, I also sometimes forget my schedule. You can sit for a minute, and I will check with the doctor the visit for now.” Having received an appointment, the grandmother did not demand that she be given a very effective, but inexpensive medicine that can instantly help cure the disease; threatening in case of refusal to write complaints to all public bodies or media but sighed and said: – “I am not completely out of my mind. I understand that old age cannot be cured, but can you forgive me, doctor, for dragging myself to you all the time. ”

And the doctor walking home in the evening, suddenly remembered his grandmother and felt sorry for her. He suddenly thought that life in its usual rush flies by, and, giving in to a sudden impulse, stopped at the nearest supermarket, bought a bouquet of flowers, a cake with cream roses and went the other way. He drove up to a house, climbed to the third floor and knocked on the door. “I’ve been thinking, about time and you. I bought you a cake, but I accidentally put my briefcase on it. I hope this is not a bad thing, because it will not affect the taste. I also bought you flowers, but they also got a little crushed by the same portfolio. Maybe they can be saved ?” “That will be alright,” the woman replied, “we will reanimate them. And I have news. Just imagine, I woke up today, I looked at the window, and my cactus has bloomed. See? ” (Source: vk.com, translated to English)

“Our power lies in our small daily choices, one after another, to create eternal ripples of a life well lived.” Mollie Marti

Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
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Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Posted in Family and Society, Life, Personal Musings, poetry, Quotes, Reflections, Work

The “Changed Faces”

Posted on by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

If you were deceived by life,
Don’t feel dismal, don’t get mad!
Be at ease and don’t feel sad:
The days of joy will soon arrive!
The heart can’t wait for this to pass;
The present is depressing here:
All is fleeting rather fast;
That which passes will be dear.
-Alexander Pushkin (1825)

Change in life, happens like water; more so when people are involved. The continuous flow of water or the sudden gush with or without a block in the regular course; taking the shape of the vessel it belongs to and tasteless but blending its flavours from the source till the other end; the nature of people runs along similar lines. Especially the latter, which maybe as predictable as the flow and nature of water or even the wind.

“It happens to everyone as they grow up. You find out who you are and what you want, and then you realize that people you’ve known forever don’t see things the way you do. So you keep the wonderful memories, but find yourself moving on.” Nicholas Sparks

Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/englisharoundtheworld
Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts

Reviewing across the various phases in life, many of us may have encountered at some point of time or other, people who were once close acquaintances become distant or avoidant; or the ones who were “less friendly” stepping in with a helping hand or forging new bonds in the later years. Such is the nature of man in general. People change, so do perspectives and perceptions. While for some the fault may be ours or on the other side; sometimes the distance may just happen. Bridging the gap maybe too late; at times a non achievable feat, no matter how much one may try.

“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.” Victor Frankl

Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/englisharoundtheworld
Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts

As the “faces” change, one of the hardest part is accepting the “blow”, while at the same time, trying one’s best to not bear deep seated grudges or hatred within. Being human, feeling hate, regret, disappointment among the many emotions is normal and natural. Yet staying in the same rut or frame of mind will prove detrimental in the short as well as the long run. People will change, each of us will be subject to change in our lives. Few times we may be at the receiving end of “changed faces”, while other times we may at the “giving” end. No matter how the “changing faces” maybe; moving on in the right manner is what matters the most. For life with her lessons, gives us memories and moments to cherish, learn from as well as mature for the better tomorrow.

“You collect people to take with you. Some people change, other people don’t… it’s wonderful because I’ve met some incredible friends.” Imogen Poots

Source:https://vk.com/pepheads
Source:https://vk.com/monahos
Source:https://vk.com/monahos
Source:https://vk.com/veruj
Source:https://vk.com/englisharoundtheworld
Source:https://vk.com/veruj
Source:https://vk.com/monahos
Posted in Daily, Life, Personal Musings, Stories Around the World

Quest for “Essence” of Life

Posted on by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“If we don’t feel love within our own selves, then do wealth and success matter as much?” – Lewis Howes (School of Greatness podcast)

Entering into the final year of school, my niece had been asking about advice for further education and career guidance. While exploring various choices and options, what brought to mind was the similar situation faced earlier in life. Looking down the lane, one eventually realizes that one needs to follow their dreams in order to find inner content. Success and wealth depends on how one defines it, but without love in life, the latter becomes a big meaningless journey.

“Love is our true destiny. We do not find the meaning of life by ourselves alone – we find it with another.” Thomas Merton

Source:https://vk.com/we_live_a
Source:https://vk.com/public75290000
Source:https://vk.com/we_live_a

For basic comfort and necessities, no matter how educated one may be; at the end what really matters is bread and butter as well as shelter, sleep and someone to share this life with. All success achieved or wealth earned will be futile if one has nobody to open up to or spend some time with. No doubt, wealth and success have their own worth and are indeed a necessary part of life. Yet if one was to welcome them, shunning out basic humaneness and kindness that love for humanity brings along with it; both wealth and success may have a fruitless run, either in the present generation or the next.

“The foundation stones for a balanced success are honesty, character, integrity, faith, love and loyalty.” Zig Ziglar

Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/public75290000

Love, Wealth and Success
Author Unknown

A woman came out of her house and saw three old men with long white beards sitting in her front yard. She did not recognize them. She said, “I don’t think I know you, but you must be hungry. Please come in and have something to eat.”
“Is the man of the house home?” they asked. “No”, she said. “He’s out.” “Then we cannot come in”, they replied.
In the evening when her husband came home, she told him what had happened. “Go tell them I am home and invite them in,” he said. The woman went out and invited the men in. “We do not go into a house together,” they replied. “Why is that?” she wanted to know. One of the old men explained: “His name is Wealth,” he said pointing to one of his friends, and said pointing to another one, “He is Success, and I am Love.” Then he added, “Now go in and discuss with your husband which one of us you want in your home.”
The woman went in and told her husband what was said. Her husband was overjoyed. “How nice!” he said. “Since that is the case, let us invite Wealth. Let him come and fill our home with wealth!” His wife disagreed. “My dear, why don’t we invite Success?” Their daughter-in-law was listening from the other corner of the house. She jumped in with her own suggestion: “Would it not be better to invite Love? Our home will then be filled with love!”

“Let us heed our daughter-in-law’s advice,” said the husband to his wife. “Go out and invite Love to be our guest.” The woman went out and asked the three old men, “Which one of you is Love? Please come in and be our guest.” Love got up and started walking toward the house. The other two also got up and followed him.

Surprised, the lady asked Wealth and Success: “I only invited Love, why are you coming in?” The old men replied together: “If you had invited Wealth or Success, the other two of us would’ve stayed out, but since you invited Love, wherever He goes, we go with him. Wherever there is Love, there is also Wealth and Success!”

Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Posted in Family and Society, Life, Personal Musings, poetry, Work

Amidst the “Dark Clouds”

Posted on by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“Clouds come floating into my life, no longer to carry rain or usher storm, but to add color to my sunset sky.” Rabindranath Tagore

With summer skies slowly fading away to the rains, the time for quiet reflections indoors when “the pitter-patter” of rain starts outside. Add to it the melee of children and keeping them occupied indoors is no easy task. With the rains on full swing, the childhood memories of making paper boats, splashing into puddles, getting wet as well as schools getting cancelled due to the downpour were the routine that comes to mind.

“And when it rains on your parade, look up rather than down. Without the rain, there would be no rainbow.” Gilbert K. Chesterton

Source:https://vk.com/veruj
Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com

Fast forward to the present day, for the “adult” rains bring forth an inner dread. Although the smell of fresh earth haunts the adult mind and memories, it is buried under the hassles of getting to work on time, the commute and the traffic, the dirty marks on the kitchen floors, clothes perpetually wet and children mud stained; rains although are necessary for the fields and crops, the adult mind prays only for a healthy dose for a short time. What the “adult” fails to realise is that, perspectives do matter. Rains can be made a hassle or as fun depending on how one blends it into one’s framework of mind.

“Into each life some rain must fall.” Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/my_1r_public

For happiness to be squelched, there are innumerable things. On the other hand, in the same scenario and same situation, change of one’s attitude, approach and perspective makes all the difference in finding happiness, losing the stress and being at peace. One needs a bit of everything in life to enjoy, a bit of rain and summer skies, a little of cold winds and snow as well as the essence of spring time air. Same is the case with joys, sorrows, happiness, failures and success. Staying on the same page, time frame or waves of success brings no challenge or sense of accomplishment and contentment in the day. To find the happiness; experiences of joys, fear, trouble, success, sorrows, kindness, love as well as failure help us appreciate the good and best things that life, time and memories wash up onto our shores.

“Life is full of beauty. Notice it. Notice the bumble bee, the small child, and the smiling faces. Smell the rain, and feel the wind. Live your life to the fullest potential, and fight for your dreams.” Ashley Smith

Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/monahos
Source:https://vk.com/veruj

There is the silly elation,
The garden the windows look on!
Soundless sunset reflection
Swims in the pool, like a swan.

Greetings, golden serenity,
Shadows of trees, black as tar!
Crows on the roof, in sincerity,
Hold vespers in praise of the star.

Timidly over the garden
Where the guelder- rose springs,
A girl in a snow white garment
A beautiful melody sings.

Like a blue gown
Cold from the meadow sweeps …
Happiness, sweet silly feeling!
Virginal blush of the cheeks!

Sergey Yesenin (1918)

“Sometimes we should express our gratitude for the small and simple things like the scent of the rain, the taste of your favorite food, or the sound of a loved one’s voice.” Joseph B. Wirthlin

Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/monahos
Source:https://vk.com/monahos
Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/monahos
Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Posted in Family and Society, Life, Personal Musings, Quotes, Reflections, Work

When on the “Other Side”

Posted on by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“But here I am in July, and why am I thinking about Christmas pudding? Probably because we always pine for what we do not have. The winter seems cozy and romantic in the hell of summer, but hot beaches and sunlight are what we yearn for all winter.” Joanna Franklin Bell

While on the drive back from work, being the passenger had benefits of giving some free time to think. On reviewing the events and activities of midweek left the mind pondering on the subtle balance on the way one thinks of life. recalling to mind, the innumerable mishaps, lucky escapes, second chances as well as the problems faced and overcome both at the work front and at home, leaves one wondering if life on the other side would have been better. The notion that “grass may be greener on the other side” is there within each one of us. While we may knowingly refuse to acknowledge or promote it, similar thoughts often surface especially when one hits any hurdle, be it physical, social, emotional or mental.

Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/my_1r_public
Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts

“And I’d like to give my love to everybody, and let them know that the grass may look greener on the other side, but believe me, it’s just as hard to cut.” Little Richard

While it may be human to think of “the green grass on the other side “; learning to think of one’s own side as well as the fences all around one may change the way of thinking from being resentful or inner misery to one of gratitude for the blessings till now. Beside doing so, would help to improve their “own share of grass”.

Before one complains about life, think about those who have left life too early with their hopes or desires incomplete, forced but never by own free choice, leaving behind a trail of grief, regrets and sorrow.

Before listing the issues with our own children, their vices and habits; think of those who long for children but cannot have them. Even worse, think of those parents who have their family broken as a consequence of vices, disease, crime, natural disasters, accidents or events beyond their control.

Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
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Source:https://vk.com/englisharoundtheworld
Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts

Before one says words of hatred, anger or swear because of the disorder at work or at home, think about those who are less fortunate, unemployed or live on the streets. On complaining about the distance one needs to drive daily, think about those who walk the same distance on foot. When tired and weighed down or complaining about work; think about those who have been recently unemployed or left their jobs due to personal issues, or have been hunting for their education based employment for quite some time.

Gratitude or blessings that one has been showered on often goes unnoticed. One never realizes that their own lives are at times envied by others. Each one has their own share of worries, same with “every other side”.

“The grass is always greener on the other side – until you get there and see it’s AstroTurf. Symbols are never reality. Someone might have amassed material success and fame, but that doesn’t mean they’re happy. So, don’t go judging a person’s life by the cover.” Karen Salmansohn

Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
Source:https://vk.com/pepheads

When thinking of “the other side”, there are innumerable parameters that can be measured or weighed. One never realizes how lucky they were, unless one goes without it. Through centuries and time, life still teaches us that, while the grass may or mayn’t be green on the other side; unless one learns to appreciate and take care of the grass that one has or owns, it will too wither and die.

“Even if the grass is greener on the other side of the fence, keep to your own side; it’s where you belong. There you can plant your own grass and tend to it.”
Richelle E. Goodrich, Slaying Dragons

Source:https://vk.com/slideshowarts
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Source:https://vk.com/pepheads
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“I looked through others’ windows
On an enchanted earth
But out of my own window–
solitude and dearth.

And yet there is a mystery
I cannot understand–
That others through my window
See an enchanted land.”
― Jessie B. Rittenhouse