Tag: relationships

Posted in Family and Society, Musique, Personal Musings, Random Thoughts, Reflections

More than Paper Chains

Posted on by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

Although winter is approaching, the autumn flowers still linger in the fields. As a part of the Sunday church community service, the youth group along with the children had visited the old-age centre in the nearest town. While spending time with the elderly age group; among the reading aloud to them, unraveling the knitting and helping in general, few children had taken with them crepe paper to start on the Christmas decorations. As paper chains of flowers and simple artwork were being done, the Lyrics of the “Chain of Love” came to mind, one of the popular songs during my school years.

“‘You don’t owe me a thing
I’ve been there too
Someone once helped me out
Just the way I’m helping you
If you really wanna pay me back
Here’s what you do
Don’t let the chain of love end with you'”…
( “The Chain of Love” is the third single from American country music singer Clay Walker’s album Live, Laugh, Love (January 2000). Lyrics were written by Rory Feek and Jonnie Barnett.)

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This mid-tempo song , “The Chain of Love” narrates the story of three characters who, by helping each other in some way, form a “chain of love” amongst them. While hanging up the paper chains, each design was a reminder of the chains of love that we build amongst ourselves. One can chose not to make any chain, repair the torn chains with glue or make new designs everyday. Yet as the chains grow, they connect each one of us in a special way. While it may true that “what goes around, comes around”; know that life is not lived as a lone island. The gift of life, involves finding beauty in the world around us, sharing the joy and laughter and lending a helping hand, when felt or as required. As the chains connect us along the years, it brings to mind what life, time, love and kindness are all about.

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The Chain Of Love
Clay Walker

He was driving home one evening
In his beat-up Pontiac
When an old lady flagged him down
Her Mercedes had a flat

He could see that she was frightened
Standing out there in the snow
‘Til he said ‘I’m here to help you, ma’m
By the way, my name’s Joe’

She said ‘I’m from St. Louis
And I’m only passing through
I must’ve seen a hundred cars go by
This is awful nice of you’

When he changed the tire
And closed her trunk
And was about to drive away
She said ‘How much do I owe you?’
Here’s what he had to say

‘You don’t owe me a thing
I’ve been there too
Someone once helped me out
Just the way I’m helping you
If you really wanna pay me back
Here’s what you do
Don’t let the chain of love end with you’

Well, a few miles down the road
The lady saw a small cafe
She went in to grab a bite to eat
And then be on her way

But she couldn’t help but notice
How the waitress smiled so sweet
She must have been eight months
Along and dead on her feet

No, she didn’t know her story
And she probably never will
When the waitress went to get her
Change from a hundred dollar bill

The lady slipped right out the door
And on a nakpin left a note
There were tears in the waitress’ eyes
When she read what she’d wrote

‘You don’t owe me a thing
I’ve been there too
Someone once helped me out
Just the way I’m helping you
If you really wanna pay me back
Here’s what you do
Don’t let the chain of love end with you’

That night when she got
Home from work
The waitress climbed into bed
She was thinking about the money
And what the lady’s note had said
As her husband lay there sleeping
She whispered soft and low
‘Everything’s gonna be alright
I love you, Joe’
(Source: Internet) 

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Posted in Family and Society, Life, Personal Musings, poetry, Reflections

More than Imprints

Posted on by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“And now here is my secret, a very simple secret: It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.” Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, The Little Prince

These days, while driving for an out of the town workshop ( with attendance made compulsory from the head boss); the hassles faced in mapping out the course or drive isn’t as big as compared to any similar happening, lets say, around twenty years ago. With Google giving the directions, vehicles equipped with navigation, phones that function as maps and better roads; on the whole venturing into a new territory isn’t met with fear of getting lost anymore.

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Rewinding back to those years, one relied on the passerby who were generous with their navigation advice and sense of direction. Many a time, getting on the wrong road resulted in one stepping out at the local roadside shop, asking for specific directions, enjoying a good cup of coffee and then heading back on the road with fresh directions and in better spirits. Those better spirits are in part, from the print left behind by those around us. Though these days, Google helps us to navigate; there are still imprints left behind.

“I am grateful for every precious moment life offers me. It allows me to see the miracle in each experience.” Emmanuel Dagher

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From the numerous social interactions that we all experience, few stay on the mind stronger than before. May be it could be attached with pleasantness, a warm feeling and happiness or peace within; while other imprints may leave a bitter feel. Which ever way, we all leave our imprints in different ways. Just like the fellow passerby of yesteryear, when one chooses to leave behind heart-prints ( not just imprints) it makes life more beautiful. Over the years, as one realizes the more heart-prints one leaves behind, the treasure chest of memories, happiness and peace with contentment can be experienced in every waking hour.

“Every day in every way we are leaving our mark.” Rachael Bermingham

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Heartprints
Author Unknown

Whatever our hands touch –
We leave fingerprints!
On walls, on furniture
On doorknobs, dishes, books.
There’s no escape.
As we touch we leave our identity.

Wherever I go today
Help me leave heartprints!
Heartprints of compassion
Of understanding and love.

Heartprints of kindness
And genuine concern.
May my heart touch a lonely neighbor
Or a runaway daughter
Or an anxious mother
Or perhaps an aged grandfather.

Send me out today
To leave heartprints.
And if someone should say,
“I felt your touch,”
May they also sense the love
that is deep within my heart.

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Posted in Daily, Family and Society, Life, poetry, Quotes, Random Thoughts

Little…but Add Up

Posted on by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“Great things are not done by impulse, but by a series of small things brought together.” George Eliot

After the long two hour commute was dragged to three hours by being held up in the traffic, the mental list of “things to do” kept on going longer than the usual. Consequently while walking into home after doing the daily grocery shopping, instead of the expected mess in the kitchen, it was a pleasant surprise to witness the orderliness at the domestic front. With my “better half” in charge, the kids had instructed me to put my feet and to enjoy the hot steaming cup of Joe. Though eventually the domestic front had to be tackled, the few minutes of silence and solitude improved the frame of mind.

“The small things of life were often so much bigger than the great things . . . the trivial pleasure like cooking, one’s home, little poems especially sad ones, solitary walks, funny things seen and overheard.” Barbara Pym

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One never realizes the importance of the little events of the day that stay etched in the mind. The recollections turn up at the most unusual moments. For the inner strength during difficult moments, the support when the temporary setbacks mount up and the drive to go ahead, all have few of their rots in the little moments of life, which now become among the treasured memories of happiness to give comfort and light for the rainy days.

“It has long been an axiom of mine that the little things are infinitely the most important.” Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, The Memoirs of Sherlock Holmes

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The Little Things
Mary Dawson Hughes

It really is the little things
That mean the most of all…
The “let me help you with that” things
That may seem very small
The “I’ll be glad to do it” things
That make your cares much lighter,
The “laugh with me, it’s funny” things
That make your outlook brighter…

The “never mind the trouble” things,
The “yes, I understand,”
The interest and encouragement
In everything you’ve planned
It really is the little things,
The friendly word or smile,
That add such happiness to life
And make it more worth while.

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Posted in Daily, Life, Stories Around the World

Plant the Right Seed

Posted on by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

To stick to one’s own internal policy is never easy, especially in the modern world where the temptations are too strong and the lure to be “the important one” quite potent. Which is why when any event or project happens; versions vary a lot, the outcome goes tangentially way off the expected on the downward spiral and tensions cause plenty unrest. In short, somewhere along the way of growth, success, achievement and modernism; the core principles of integrity, respect, honour, kindness and humaneness have been lost. While each one pursues their own versions of truth; eventually the masks will fall off and the bare bones of evidences will expose themselves. By then, if the path travelled is on the right grounds, one can safely move ahead with integrity and above all, peace of mind.

“Integrity is telling myself the truth. And honesty is telling the truth to other people.” Spencer Johnson

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“The emperor grew old in one eastern country and realized that it was time to choose a successor. But instead of nominating a successor from among one of his assistants or his heirs, he decided to choose something else. All the young people who only lived in the empire, he asked to come together in one day. When everyone gathered together, the emperor addressed the young people with these words: “I am already old, it’s time for me to resign. We need to choose the next emperor. I decided to choose one of you. ”
The children of the emperor were shocked! But the emperor continued. “Today I am going to give each of you one seed. These are seeds of very special plants. I want you to sow the seeds, pour water on them, and a year later, starting today, you must return here to grow from these seeds. Then I will compare the plants you bring, and the one I choose will be the next emperor! ”

One young man named Ling was also at the emperor’s reception that day, and he, like the others, received the seeds. He went home and anxiously told his mother about everything that had happened in the palace. Mama Ling helped the young man pick up the pot and soil for the plant, he sowed the seed and poured it. Every day he watered him, looked after him and watched if the sprouts appeared. After about three weeks, other young people started talking about their seeds and plants, which began to grow. Ling continued to check his seed, but nothing grew. It took another 3 weeks, then 4 weeks, then 5 weeks … However, nothing grew in Ling’s pot. While all the other young people were talking about their plants, about how fast they grow, Ling didn’t have anything, and he felt like a loser. Half a year has passed, but even a tiny sprout did not appear in Ling’s pot. With bitterness in his heart, he was forced to admit to himself that he had ruined his seed. However, Ling said nothing to his friends. He simply continued to wait, in the depths of his soul hoping that his seed would grow.

Finally, the year ended, and young people from all over the empire brought their plants to the emperor for testing. At first Ling told his mother that he was not going to carry an empty pot to the palace. But his mother advised the young man to be honest, to tell how everything happened, and although Ling felt devastated, in his heart he knew that his mother was right. He took his empty pot and went to the palace. Coming to the emperor, Ling was amazed at the variety of plants grown by other young people. They were beautiful, varied in shape and size. Ling put the empty pot on the floor and everyone started laughing at him. Some felt sorry for him, and they simply said: “Hey, well, that I tried.” Then the emperor entered the hall and greeted the young people. Ling tried to hide behind the backs of others.

“There are three constants in life . . . change, choice and principles.” Stephen Covey

“Well done! What magnificent plants, trees and flowers you have grown, ”said the emperor,“ Today one of you will be appointed emperor! ”Suddenly, in the depths of the hall, the emperor noticed Ling and his empty pot. He ordered the guard to lead him forward. Ling was terrified. “The emperor knows that I am a loser!” – he thought. “Maybe he will order me to be executed?” The guards brought Ling forward, and the emperor asked him his name. “My name is Ling,” he answered timidly. Everyone laughed. The emperor asked everyone to calm down, and then looked at Ling, and declared: “Here is your new emperor! His name is Ling! ”

Ling could not believe his ears. After all, he could not even grow his seed. How could he have been chosen by the new emperor?

Then the emperor said: “Exactly a year ago, I distributed the seeds to all those present here. I ordered you to take the seeds, plant them, water them, and come back to me today. But I gave you all the boiled seeds that could not germinate. All of you, with the exception of Ling, brought me trees, plants and flowers. When you realized that the seed would not grow, you replaced the seed that I gave you. Ling was the only one whose courage and honesty was enough to bring me a pot with my seed. That is why he will be the new emperor! ”

“As I have said, the first thing is to be honest with yourself. You can never have an impact on society if you have not changed yourself. Great peacemakers are all people of integrity, of honesty, but humility.” Nelson Mandela

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Posted in Daily, Life, poetry, Quotes, Random Thoughts

Silent to Listen

Posted on by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“We went down into the silent garden. Dawn is the time when nothing breathes, the hour of silence. Everything is transfixed, only the light moves.” Leonora Carrington

With rising rays bringing forth the day, when the world around is absent of the daily noise from the street, appliances and speech; the music of nature can be heard. From the distant chirping of the birds to the quiet flutter of the leaves, fall of the coloured leaves and the fleeing swish of the patio curtains by the wandering breeze; all highlight how many things can be heard when the fruitless chatter ceases and one learns to listen.

“I tried to discover, in the rumor of forests and waves, words that other men could not hear, and I pricked up my ears to listen to the revelation of their harmony.” Gustave Flaubert

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Reflecting back, there may be many instances when one may have lost out on not really listening. Missed notes during meetings or sessions, wrong information imparted, silent indicators to the tenuousness of relationships and worse, misinterpretations as a consequence of the impatience attached to listening and the constant hurry. On the other hand, there have been occasions wherein one keeps silent when the right words would have been necessary to set things right. The pans on the balance may swing on either side.

Yet many are on the chase, than learning to listen, learn from the silence and live the dream. As one ages, the realization that the constant run may cause one to miss out on what has been there along the road. By the time, one realizes that we do need to stop at the right rest points to rejuvenate; the path travelled may have gone too far away from the right course. While the old bones try to remap their course and regain the silence to refresh; the younger ones should learn to appreciate their silent sources at hand, which help one to grow, rejuvenate and learn from the yesteryear.

“Silence is a source of Great Strength.” Lao Tzu

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Learn To Be Quiet
You need not do anything.
Remain sitting at your table and listen.
You need not even listen, just wait.
You need not even wait,
just learn to be quiet, still and solitary.
And the world will freely offer itself to you unmasked.
It has no choice, it will roll in ecstasy at your feet.
– Franz Kafka

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Posted in Family and Society, Life, poetry, Quotes, Reflections

Priceless Over Time

Posted on by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

“The most desired gift of love is not diamonds or roses or chocolate. It is focused attention.” Richard Warren

The other day, few colleagues were discussing on the special gifts that were given to them on anniversaries, birthdays, special days and the like. While a lot of “how lovely”, “wonderful” and the like, were being said; a couple of us had raised eyebrows within. The reason being simply that one wasn’t gifted anything really exquisite for special occasions. On reflecting back, my spouse had bought me gifts unexpected, not because of a special day but because he saw that I had needed it. A booking at the spa, evening night out with my girlfriends, stepping in out of the way to drop and pick me up from the salon were not on any special days, but because he had wanted to help out. For us, special occasions are marked by a special meal, home cooked and quiet time with family. But then this perspective depends on how one sees it. As I always believe in, each one to their own. But harm not oneself or those around them. What is important is whether the “better halves” are around for support, help and love especially when the situation gets tough, either at the professional, home or on social front.

“The best and most beautiful things in this world cannot be seen or even heard, but must be felt with the heart.” Helen Keller

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The feeling of being regarded special and own in the eyes of the other is something that can’t be explained by words alone. The regard of a true friend who steps up and is there unasked. The mother who makes the special dish that her son likes but she herself hates. The father who delays his own personal expense in favour of his children or his parents. Teenagers who do their chores quietly, going about their things without a fuss and being responsible in the family. The next door neighbour who pops in with a homemade pie when they know that with a sick child, cooking for the rest isn’t an option. Grandparents who offer to baby sit so that the parents can have some quiet personal time. All these are different forms of love, that don’t come with a flash and bang. It is this kind of love, concern and kindness that one longs to happen.

“True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked.” Erich Segal

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There are different facets of love, with each own being special in it’s form or kind. To live in harmony and have meaningful relationships with those around us, one needs to love and be loved; without any tag attached. This kind of love heals, helps one face the difficult times and overcome them. The downfall is that, this kind of love, tends to be taken for granted. One realizes it’s significance, when one loses it, sometimes by their hands or by no fault of theirs. Learning to appreciate these special kinds of love is what makes life beautiful and fills the treasure chest for the unexpected dark, stormy days.

“Sometimes the heart sees what is invisible to the eye.” H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

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I’ve nothing else to offer, so, to you, it’s love I’ll send.
It’s nothing that I borrowed and it’s nothing that I’d lend.

It has no dollar value and it can’t be overused.
It isn’t fragile, so it can’t break, though often it’s abused.

I’ve given it to others, but each time it’s unique.
Its meaning’s always different; it depends on what you seek.

It’s something you can store away, to feel when you’re in need.
But never is it on display, its beauty can’t be seen.

I’m giving it ‘no strings attached,’ no costly warranty.
This love that I am sending has a lifetime guarantee.
Author Unknown

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Posted in Daily, Family and Society, Reflections, Stories Around the World

Foggy Glasses

Posted on by Sugar and Spice..... Among Other Things

Although the winds are changing to the tune of autumn, certain areas still have their afternoon muggy heat to hold true to. On such times of the day, the car air-conditioner saves one from the humidity. Yet the incessant fogginess lurking when one steps out from the vehicle serves to keep the glass wipes always at hand, especially for spectacle wearers like yours truly. Yesterday while on errands, I had to repeatedly clean off the haziness on my glasses, while stepping out of my car. If one forgets to, the blurred surroundings remind that what one perceives isn’t what it is out there. The repeated cleaning reminded me of the article I had read across my social media pages of “Dirty Laundry”.

“The self-righteous scream judgments against others to hide the noise of skeletons dancing in their own closets.” John Mark Green

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A lot of instances in our lives involve cleaning the glasses or windows. To pint a finger and critically decide is far easier than getting down to the task of cleaning own windows. What one persistently fails to realize is the loss of missing out on the beautiful views of life, than just saying words that may burn later. Life is too short to miss out on the panoramic views it offers. Getting down to cleaning the glasses may leave us feeling more content and happy, than sitting simply twiddling thumbs and pointing fingers. So why would one want to miss out on the gifts of relationships, views and people that life offers ?

“We have an inner window through which we can see the world, and though it gets cloudy in life, it’s our job to wipe it clean and see things as they really are.” Sebastian Koch

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A young, successful couple found their dream home. Shortly after purchasing it, the couple sat at their kitchen table to indulge in a delicious breakfast. The wife looked out the window, and to her surprise, she saw her neighbor hanging dirty laundry on the clothesline. ‘That laundry isn’t clean, it’s still dirty!’ she said to her husband. ‘Someone needs to teach her a thing or two when it comes to washing her clothes!’

A couple of days later, the couple sat down at their kitchen table for another meal. The wife saw her neighbor hanging clothes on the clothesline. But this time something was different. ‘Wow, look!’ the surprised wife said to her husband, ‘Her clothes are clean! Someone must have taught her how to wash her clothes!’ Without raising his head from his plate, the husband kindly responded, ‘Actually, honey, I got up early this morning and washed the window.’

And so it is with life—what we see when watching others depends on the window through which we look. Washing our own windows from time to time changes our perspective.  (©Copyright WisdomShare — All Rights Reserved)

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