Posted in Family and Society, Life, Personal Musings, Reflections, Stories Around the World

Tiny, But of Effect

One of the many things that one discovers along the way in life, is the various aspects of human nature and the fragility that it holds. The peace within oneself can be easily shattered in a matter of seconds. A full blown crisis or change in opinion or loss of relationships, all these and many more similar types upset the fragile balance within. While the external factors may trouble the peace, many a time it may be the inner thoughts which create havoc.

“Negative thoughts stick around because we believe them, not because we want them or choose them.” Andrew J. Bernstein

By default, when one observes, it mayn’t be the crisis that breaks one down or the relationships, but the negative feelings that have slowly accumulated during the comfortable moments of life. Gradually the negativism erodes the inner peace and builds on destroying the best gifts that life has in store for each one of us. The question here then arises, what are we going to do about the inner negativism. While the initial thing to do is to address them, in sequence one should channel the energy to the more productive aspects of life. It jut takes a turn of thoughts to make a difference in life.

“It takes but one positive thought when given a chance to survive and thrive to overpower an entire army of negative thoughts.” Robert H. Schuller

The battle of the beetles

On the slope of Long’s Peak in Colorado lies the ruin of a gigantic tree. Naturalists tell us that it stood for some four hundred years. It was a seedling when Columbus landed at San Salvador, and half grown when the pilgrims settled at Plymouth. During the course of its long life it was struck by lightning fourteen times and the innumerable avalanches and storms of four centuries thundered past it. It survived them all. In the end, however, an army of beetles attacked the tree and leveled it to the ground. The insects ate their way through the bark and gradually destroyed the inner strength of the tree by their tiny but incessant attacks. A forest giant which age had not withered, nor lightning blasted, nor storms subdued, fell at last before beetles so small that a man could crush them between his forefinger and his thumb.
There is a parallel in this story which should serve as a warning to us. Most of us can survive times of crisis. We summon the strength of faith or resolve for most any battle that we face head on. Whether it is in our professional or personal lives, we often overcome great obstacles. It is the small things like jealousy, anger, resentment, pettiness and negativity that eat us from the inside, which often bring about our downfall. Unlike a giant tree, we can identify and fight those moral or ethical beetles.” We must, however, be constantly on guard.
Author: Dr. Harry Emerson Fosdick

Posted in Family and Society, Life, poetry, Quotes, Reflections

Priceless Over Time

“The most desired gift of love is not diamonds or roses or chocolate. It is focused attention.” Richard Warren

The other day, few colleagues were discussing on the special gifts that were given to them on anniversaries, birthdays, special days and the like. While a lot of “how lovely”, “wonderful” and the like, were being said; a couple of us had raised eyebrows within. The reason being simply that one wasn’t gifted anything really exquisite for special occasions. On reflecting back, my spouse had bought me gifts unexpected, not because of a special day but because he saw that I had needed it. A booking at the spa, evening night out with my girlfriends, stepping in out of the way to drop and pick me up from the salon were not on any special days, but because he had wanted to help out. For us, special occasions are marked by a special meal, home cooked and quiet time with family. But then this perspective depends on how one sees it. As I always believe in, each one to their own. But harm not oneself or those around them. What is important is whether the “better halves” are around for support, help and love especially when the situation gets tough, either at the professional, home or on social front.

“The best and most beautiful things in this world cannot be seen or even heard, but must be felt with the heart.” Helen Keller

The feeling of being regarded special and own in the eyes of the other is something that can’t be explained by words alone. The regard of a true friend who steps up and is there unasked. The mother who makes the special dish that her son likes but she herself hates. The father who delays his own personal expense in favour of his children or his parents. Teenagers who do their chores quietly, going about their things without a fuss and being responsible in the family. The next door neighbour who pops in with a homemade pie when they know that with a sick child, cooking for the rest isn’t an option. Grandparents who offer to baby sit so that the parents can have some quiet personal time. All these are different forms of love, that don’t come with a flash and bang. It is this kind of love, concern and kindness that one longs to happen.

“True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked.” Erich Segal

There are different facets of love, with each own being special in it’s form or kind. To live in harmony and have meaningful relationships with those around us, one needs to love and be loved; without any tag attached. This kind of love heals, helps one face the difficult times and overcome them. The downfall is that, this kind of love, tends to be taken for granted. One realizes it’s significance, when one loses it, sometimes by their hands or by no fault of theirs. Learning to appreciate these special kinds of love is what makes life beautiful and fills the treasure chest for the unexpected dark, stormy days.

“Sometimes the heart sees what is invisible to the eye.” H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

I’ve nothing else to offer, so, to you, it’s love I’ll send.
It’s nothing that I borrowed and it’s nothing that I’d lend.

It has no dollar value and it can’t be overused.
It isn’t fragile, so it can’t break, though often it’s abused.

I’ve given it to others, but each time it’s unique.
Its meaning’s always different; it depends on what you seek.

It’s something you can store away, to feel when you’re in need.
But never is it on display, its beauty can’t be seen.

I’m giving it ‘no strings attached,’ no costly warranty.
This love that I am sending has a lifetime guarantee.
Author Unknown

Posted in Life, Personal Musings, poetry, Random Thoughts

Start the Change

“The world as we have created it is a process of our thinking. It cannot be changed without changing our thinking.” Albert Einstein

Of recent, two of my childhood friends had quit their careers based on their training. While one switched their passion from advertising to pure art; the other switched from business administration to the kitchen, where the flavours of various cuisines and the science of cooking were learnt on professional lines. These decisions of theirs had given the thought of “dream career” a new meaning.

“Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself.” Leo Tolstoy

Each one of us have been blessed with a different skill, the passion towards an art or learning from within. While society may define certain careers as grand or of higher social standing; the reality is that simply pursuing them for the sake of “the social fame” will leave one depressed and dejected in the long run. During my stint as a career adviser during few of the school and adolescent counselling meet, what comes to mind is the words of my professor, “Do what you love, for that is what you will excel in”. If the road towards that dream isn’t feasible now, don’t let the skill die but nurture it, not just so to lose it but to regain own peace of mind, while engaging in it at times. It is never late to make a change in any form. For doing something that one loves, is thousand times far better than not doing it at all.

“For what it’s worth: it’s never too late or, in my case, too early to be whoever you want to be. There’s no time limit, stop whenever you want. You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. And I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you’re proud of. If you find that you’re not, I hope you have the courage to start all over again.” Eric Roth, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button Screenplay

It’s Not Too Late
Ron Atchison

It’s not too late… the angel said.
Even though the world’s a mess…
Even though you’re not that young…
Even though you’ve made mistakes and have been afraid
It’s not too late…
And then I saw the world through the angel’s eyes…
I saw the colors I could paint
The bridges I could build
The lives that I could touch
The dreams that could still come true
And it became very clear to me…
That it’s not too late.

Posted in Daily, Life, Personal Musings, poetry, Reflections

Through the Aftermath

“One of the greatest discoveries a man makes, one of his great surprises, is to find he can do what he was afraid he couldn’t do.” Henry Ford

The ordeal of getting involved in the wrong is horrible. Speaking for those who face it on a daily basis or see violence from a professional view point, in the health sector where people come beaten, injured or batter to the emergency room, the police who has to assess the horrible crime scene, the rape victim and their family of loved ones who have to collectively face the ordeal of coming out of their nightmare, the court which handles gross unjust cases or event he teachers at school who have to tackle he silent bullying in a very subtle way. Above all, all those who return from war, tying to make sense of the entire event, what had be done and the impact. The after effect is more mind numbing than the event itself. Each and similar situation to the lines above, reflects a little of the post traumatic stress that one goes through. Whether it be profession related, the inner mental trauma or the ongoing social, verbal or physical violence that one has to endure, witness or handle; the negative side of humanity has a crippling effect long after the actual event has happened.

“I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.” Nelson Mandela

Coming out of the aftermath is the most difficult part. Facing the stress long after the situation has been done and over, is the most traumatic part. Each one of us have our sets of traumatic moments. The fear of being alone after being mugged or violated, the battle within to come out of the vice of smoking, the handling of daily life after the war or facing school for a bully-victim, all these need one to find their own reserve of courage and strength to brave the situation and face the day. It takes immense will to come out of the quagmire of negative emotions from the past that may bombard one and collapse the day.

“You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, ‘I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.'” Eleanor Roosevelt

Walking through those painful feelings and recollections isn’t done in a huge leap, but in baby steps. Yet once started to cope, one discovers that each one has it within themselves to face the fear and learn to brave the storm. Whether the steps made be big or small ones, those hardly matters more than the fact that one has resolved to move on and address their fears, than dwell in them. We are all survivors in our own way. Finding the light and purpose in life, is what matters the most. Once we draw out the strength and courage hidden deep within, one discovers that life is more beautiful now than before.

“I’m not afraid of storms, for I’m learning how to sail my ship.” Louisa May Alcott

Strength and Courage

It takes strength to be certain,
It takes courage to have doubts.

It takes strength to fit in,
It takes courage to stand out.

It takes strength to share a friend’s pain,
It takes courage to feel your own pain.

It takes strength to hide your own pain,
It takes courage to show it and deal with it.

It takes strength to stand guard,
It takes courage to let down your guard.

It takes strength to conquer,
It takes courage to surrender.

It takes strength to endure abuse,
It takes courage to stop it.

It takes strength to stand alone,
It takes courage to lean on a friend.

It takes strength to love,
It takes courage to beloved.

It takes strength to survive,
It takes courage to live.

Written by David L. Griffith

Posted in Family and Society, Life, Personal Musings, poetry, Quotes, Random Thoughts

To “Get Set…Go”

“Promise me you’ll always remember: You’re braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” Christopher Robin to Pooh, A.A. Milne

With careful precision, a pair of tiny grubby hands steadily held the sticks and fixed them onto the muddy ground. Nearby a pair of dried leaves lay scattered along with a couple of stones and more tiny sticks. The process of building a village map was done with great concentration and considerably deliberate thought. Little does the mind know whether the rain would wash away the model or if the thin sticks would be blown away. They make it because they really want to. For this toddler, getting set and doing is more important than only figuring out the possibility of whether it could be done. For them, to know they have to try it themselves.

“It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare; it is because we do not dare that things are difficult” Seneca the Younger

No one knows till they try. This basic innate courage to do the dream is slowly lost as the years progress. While the adult mind has learnt the ability to think; it tends to dwell more in the thinking than the doing part. The possibility of difficulties and fear of losing out features more prominently than getting down and doing. Eventually when one decides to get down to doing it, what runs out fast is “time”. Sad reality of time is once over, it can never be brought back.

“According to the ancient Chinese proverb, A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step.” John F. Kennedy

Anything big happens with the initial small steps. While the whole world may say that “to think of the possible”; when the heart says the dream is possible, get to doing it. Things will always eventually work out and fall into place. Follow one’s own plan, instead f relying solely on the words around them. Listen, think and act; not simply listen, over think and procrastinate. Over time, one realizes that the beauty of what was once deemed impossible is priceless as it became possible. To experience such feelings of peace, contentment, fulfillment and happiness are few of the simple things that define our lives.

“A problem is a chance for you to do your best.” Duke Ellington

It Couldn’t Be Done
Edgar A. Guest

Somebody said that it couldn’t be done,
But he with a chuckle replied
That maybe it couldn’t, but he would be one
Who wouldn’t say so “till he tried.”
So he buckled right in with the trace of a grin
On his face. If he worried, he hid it.
He started to sing as he tackled the thing
That couldn’t be done, and he did it.

Somebody scoffed: “Oh, you’ll never do that;
At least no one ever has done it.”
But he took off his coat and took off his hat
And the first thing he knew he’d begun it.
With the lift of his chin and a bit of a grin,
Without any doubting or quiddit,
He started to sing as he tackled the thing
That couldn’t be done, and he did it.

There are thousands to tell you it cannot be done,
There are thousands to prophesy failure;
There are thousands to point out to you, one by one,
The dangers that wait to assail you.
But just buckle right in with a bit of a grin,
Then take off your coat and go to it;
Just start in to sing as you tackle the thing
That cannot be done, and you’ll do it.

“You can do anything you decide to do.” Amelia Earhart

Posted in Christian, Daily, Life, poetry, Reflections

As They Grow, I Pray…

“See that you do not despise one of these little ones. For I tell you that their angels in heaven always see the face of my Father in heaven.” Matthew 18:10

Starting the new session of post Sunday church teaching for the primary children, a sense of joy and happiness surface on seeing those little faces listen avidly to the teachings and stories of the Bible. In one class alone, there would be many interesting behaviours to be seen. Some would listen keenly, others would giggle a bit and ask questions and the select few who were the mischief makers in class. All in all, teaching a class of primary schoolers brings forth a sense of fun, contentment and opens the insight to their guileless and innocuous behaviour.

“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.” Matthew 22:37-39

What happens over the years as they mature to adolescence ? Observing and listening to my adolescent niece, one often wonders how the values and innocence of childhood have been influenced by the modernism of the world around as well as the complicated adult lives. The snide remarks, eve teasing and bullying may have been picked up from the adults the initiators interact, observe or live with. As a consequence, the vicious chain of “wrong behaviour” gets extended on to the younger generations. What one never imagines, is the far reaching impact of this into the future. Over time, will inter-relations be more strained and living more surrounded by indirect communication and social media or the virtual world than building real meaningful relationships in the lives allotted to one.

“In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.” Matthew 5:16

During the conversation with adolescents of my family, is when one hopes that children never lose their innate guileless and loving nature. No matter how fast or where one grows, their childlike thinking, openness, straightforward words and happy nature shouldn’t be lost over the years. On seeing those happy faces, no matter how weary the adult mind becomes, the hope for a brighter future for the generations ahead is still cherished.

“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.” Romans 15:13

A Prayer For Our Children

Our children who live on earth,
Holy are each and every one of you.
May good dreams come,
Your way be found,
And heaven and earth rejoice with you.

May you be given
All you need for life
And may you accept our mistakes
As you allow yourself
To make mistakes and grow.

Lead us with imagination
And true integrity,
For yours are the minds, the hearts, and the souls
To heal the world
Now and forever.

Anonymous

Posted in Daily, Life, Personal Musings, poetry, Quotes, Reflections, Work

Close the Lid

“No river can return to its source, yet all rivers must have a beginning.” Proverb

During the recent cleaning spree of the attic, I had chanced across the old job applications, which I had filed away for prospective future use. Leafing through them bought back memories of the initial struggle, the difficult hours, poor pay and the constant mental strain of the uncertainty of employment. However today, all these feelings don’t sting anymore. May be it’s because I have accepted that life does throw it’s disappointments at us, once in a while. Or may be it is because I had decided to make the best of the situation and closed the lid on the previous failures, after learning what they had to teach.

“Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.” Seneca

All of us, have come across the feelings of regret, either personal, professional, physical or social. Yet the difference lies in how we react to them, learn form them or move on. The choice is ours to decide and act on. When one tends to foster the bad feelings and breed them, it isn’t the present that only takes a setback but the future too. Doing so would never help us to grow in life or reach the full potential. Let the past failures stay there. Instead carry forward the learning from those experiences and shape the future akin to the dream within.

“Starting over is an acceptance of a past we can’t change, an unrelenting conviction that the future can be different, and the stubborn wisdom to use the past to make the future what the past was not.” Craig D. Lounsbrough

Yesterday’s Door
I have shut the door on yesterday,
Its sorrows and mistakes.
I have locked within its gloomy walls
Past failures and mistakes.

And now I throw the key away,
And seek another room.
And furnish it with hope and smiles,
And every spring-time bloom.

No thought shall enter this abode
That has a taint of pain.
And envy, malice, and distrust
Shall never entrance gain.

I have shut the door on yesterday
And thrown the key away.
Tomorrow holds no fear for me,
Since I have found today.

Author Unknown

“Every day brings a chance for you to draw in a breath, kick off your shoes, and dance.” Oprah Winfrey