Posted in Family and Society, Life, Personal Musings, Reflections, Stories Around the World

Tiny, But of Effect

One of the many things that one discovers along the way in life, is the various aspects of human nature and the fragility that it holds. The peace within oneself can be easily shattered in a matter of seconds. A full blown crisis or change in opinion or loss of relationships, all these and many more similar types upset the fragile balance within. While the external factors may trouble the peace, many a time it may be the inner thoughts which create havoc.

“Negative thoughts stick around because we believe them, not because we want them or choose them.” Andrew J. Bernstein

By default, when one observes, it mayn’t be the crisis that breaks one down or the relationships, but the negative feelings that have slowly accumulated during the comfortable moments of life. Gradually the negativism erodes the inner peace and builds on destroying the best gifts that life has in store for each one of us. The question here then arises, what are we going to do about the inner negativism. While the initial thing to do is to address them, in sequence one should channel the energy to the more productive aspects of life. It jut takes a turn of thoughts to make a difference in life.

“It takes but one positive thought when given a chance to survive and thrive to overpower an entire army of negative thoughts.” Robert H. Schuller

The battle of the beetles

On the slope of Long’s Peak in Colorado lies the ruin of a gigantic tree. Naturalists tell us that it stood for some four hundred years. It was a seedling when Columbus landed at San Salvador, and half grown when the pilgrims settled at Plymouth. During the course of its long life it was struck by lightning fourteen times and the innumerable avalanches and storms of four centuries thundered past it. It survived them all. In the end, however, an army of beetles attacked the tree and leveled it to the ground. The insects ate their way through the bark and gradually destroyed the inner strength of the tree by their tiny but incessant attacks. A forest giant which age had not withered, nor lightning blasted, nor storms subdued, fell at last before beetles so small that a man could crush them between his forefinger and his thumb.
There is a parallel in this story which should serve as a warning to us. Most of us can survive times of crisis. We summon the strength of faith or resolve for most any battle that we face head on. Whether it is in our professional or personal lives, we often overcome great obstacles. It is the small things like jealousy, anger, resentment, pettiness and negativity that eat us from the inside, which often bring about our downfall. Unlike a giant tree, we can identify and fight those moral or ethical beetles.” We must, however, be constantly on guard.
Author: Dr. Harry Emerson Fosdick

Posted in Family and Society, Life, poetry, Quotes, Reflections

Priceless Over Time

“The most desired gift of love is not diamonds or roses or chocolate. It is focused attention.” Richard Warren

The other day, few colleagues were discussing on the special gifts that were given to them on anniversaries, birthdays, special days and the like. While a lot of “how lovely”, “wonderful” and the like, were being said; a couple of us had raised eyebrows within. The reason being simply that one wasn’t gifted anything really exquisite for special occasions. On reflecting back, my spouse had bought me gifts unexpected, not because of a special day but because he saw that I had needed it. A booking at the spa, evening night out with my girlfriends, stepping in out of the way to drop and pick me up from the salon were not on any special days, but because he had wanted to help out. For us, special occasions are marked by a special meal, home cooked and quiet time with family. But then this perspective depends on how one sees it. As I always believe in, each one to their own. But harm not oneself or those around them. What is important is whether the “better halves” are around for support, help and love especially when the situation gets tough, either at the professional, home or on social front.

“The best and most beautiful things in this world cannot be seen or even heard, but must be felt with the heart.” Helen Keller

The feeling of being regarded special and own in the eyes of the other is something that can’t be explained by words alone. The regard of a true friend who steps up and is there unasked. The mother who makes the special dish that her son likes but she herself hates. The father who delays his own personal expense in favour of his children or his parents. Teenagers who do their chores quietly, going about their things without a fuss and being responsible in the family. The next door neighbour who pops in with a homemade pie when they know that with a sick child, cooking for the rest isn’t an option. Grandparents who offer to baby sit so that the parents can have some quiet personal time. All these are different forms of love, that don’t come with a flash and bang. It is this kind of love, concern and kindness that one longs to happen.

“True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked.” Erich Segal

There are different facets of love, with each own being special in it’s form or kind. To live in harmony and have meaningful relationships with those around us, one needs to love and be loved; without any tag attached. This kind of love heals, helps one face the difficult times and overcome them. The downfall is that, this kind of love, tends to be taken for granted. One realizes it’s significance, when one loses it, sometimes by their hands or by no fault of theirs. Learning to appreciate these special kinds of love is what makes life beautiful and fills the treasure chest for the unexpected dark, stormy days.

“Sometimes the heart sees what is invisible to the eye.” H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

I’ve nothing else to offer, so, to you, it’s love I’ll send.
It’s nothing that I borrowed and it’s nothing that I’d lend.

It has no dollar value and it can’t be overused.
It isn’t fragile, so it can’t break, though often it’s abused.

I’ve given it to others, but each time it’s unique.
Its meaning’s always different; it depends on what you seek.

It’s something you can store away, to feel when you’re in need.
But never is it on display, its beauty can’t be seen.

I’m giving it ‘no strings attached,’ no costly warranty.
This love that I am sending has a lifetime guarantee.
Author Unknown

Posted in Daily, Family and Society, Reflections, Stories Around the World

Foggy Glasses

Although the winds are changing to the tune of autumn, certain areas still have their afternoon muggy heat to hold true to. On such times of the day, the car air-conditioner saves one from the humidity. Yet the incessant fogginess lurking when one steps out from the vehicle serves to keep the glass wipes always at hand, especially for spectacle wearers like yours truly. Yesterday while on errands, I had to repeatedly clean off the haziness on my glasses, while stepping out of my car. If one forgets to, the blurred surroundings remind that what one perceives isn’t what it is out there. The repeated cleaning reminded me of the article I had read across my social media pages of “Dirty Laundry”.

“The self-righteous scream judgments against others to hide the noise of skeletons dancing in their own closets.” John Mark Green

A lot of instances in our lives involve cleaning the glasses or windows. To pint a finger and critically decide is far easier than getting down to the task of cleaning own windows. What one persistently fails to realize is the loss of missing out on the beautiful views of life, than just saying words that may burn later. Life is too short to miss out on the panoramic views it offers. Getting down to cleaning the glasses may leave us feeling more content and happy, than sitting simply twiddling thumbs and pointing fingers. So why would one want to miss out on the gifts of relationships, views and people that life offers ?

“We have an inner window through which we can see the world, and though it gets cloudy in life, it’s our job to wipe it clean and see things as they really are.” Sebastian Koch

A young, successful couple found their dream home. Shortly after purchasing it, the couple sat at their kitchen table to indulge in a delicious breakfast. The wife looked out the window, and to her surprise, she saw her neighbor hanging dirty laundry on the clothesline. ‘That laundry isn’t clean, it’s still dirty!’ she said to her husband. ‘Someone needs to teach her a thing or two when it comes to washing her clothes!’

A couple of days later, the couple sat down at their kitchen table for another meal. The wife saw her neighbor hanging clothes on the clothesline. But this time something was different. ‘Wow, look!’ the surprised wife said to her husband, ‘Her clothes are clean! Someone must have taught her how to wash her clothes!’ Without raising his head from his plate, the husband kindly responded, ‘Actually, honey, I got up early this morning and washed the window.’

And so it is with life—what we see when watching others depends on the window through which we look. Washing our own windows from time to time changes our perspective.  (©Copyright WisdomShare — All Rights Reserved)

Posted in Daily, Personal Musings, poetry, Quotes, Reflections

End of the Trail

To experience the feeling of happiness after any difficult situation is indeed a blessing. The feeling running across the family with a member suffering from a grave illness, the joy of getting a job after constant rejection, the success of an idea which was first viewed with skepticism or the clearing of exams in the midst of personal issues are few of the many ways wherein the initial adverse moments have been diminished with the final outcome.

“What seems to us as bitter trials are often blessings in disguise.” Oscar Wilde

As each one crosses each stage of life, the manner and range of adversities vary. Yet what runs common across them all, is the strong will to categorize the various opinions, behaviour, words and emotions; sift them and take up what is progressive for the task at hand and let the wind blow the rest away. More than the circumstances; it is how one reacts to them, that matters the most. The potential of each one of us is never completely tapped, for each day one has the capacity to learn new different matter, master diverse talents and achieve the hidden dreams which float in the corners of the mind.

“Life is ten percent what you experience and ninety percent how you respond to it.” Dorothy M. Neddermeyer

We Made It

We made it.
Despite the fear and predictions of doom.
We made it.
Even though there were days when we were tired
and there were days when we forgot who we were.
We made it.
And we must thank the stars for this.
And the birds for their beautiful songs.
And the strangers who were careful to smile.
We made it.
– Ron Atchison

“When the awareness of what is achievable brushes your life, your journey has begun.” Lorii Myers

Posted in Daily, Family and Society, Random Thoughts, Reflections

Of Puddles, Mud and Joy

“All animals, except man, know that the principal business of life is to enjoy it.” Samuel Butler

With the autumn rains coming slowly into full swing, maintaining the lawn is a full swing activity as the children gather up the dead leaves, jump in and out of the puddles, save up the coloured leaves for their scrapbook or blow the white fluff before uprooting them. Playtime involves making paper boats, building up dams and forts with the mud, pebbles and water. Watching them reminds me of the real fun moments of life.

“A man is getting old when he walks around a puddle instead of through it.” R.C. Ferguson

At times, adult life takes the toll on one. Full time jobs, basic material things to own, responsibilities piling up, family to raise, budgets to maintain oneself as well as the general things of life; all of them offer more stress now. Seeing the carefree joys of childhood in the small things of life, reminds one that happiness never lies in what is achieved but in how one perceives it. Although out-station trips, expensive gifts or treats have been a source of fun and enjoyment; real happiness can be found in open fields, long walks, quiet time with loved ones, engaging the kids in baking the cake or even dancing to the popular beats and making up own tune. The simple things have a great deal to offer. Let the breeze of the wind mess up our hair, fly with it to feel the smell of earth and the seasons it carries.

“A little nonsense now and then is cherished by the wisest men.” Roald Dahl

One doesn’t need to dance to the beat in perfect synchronous manner. Each one of us ave our own tune. Instead of staying in the sidelines, getting up to dance and sing out of tune brings more joy. More than keeping the moments for the future; each day brings forth something new or better in us. Bucket lists are important; yet the little things of life have their own special treasures to offer. Learning to do them, like the little children, helps one to face life with it’s gifts, lessons, downhills and uphills; all as they come.

 

Posted in Daily, Life, Personal Musings, poetry, Reflections

Through the Aftermath

“One of the greatest discoveries a man makes, one of his great surprises, is to find he can do what he was afraid he couldn’t do.” Henry Ford

The ordeal of getting involved in the wrong is horrible. Speaking for those who face it on a daily basis or see violence from a professional view point, in the health sector where people come beaten, injured or batter to the emergency room, the police who has to assess the horrible crime scene, the rape victim and their family of loved ones who have to collectively face the ordeal of coming out of their nightmare, the court which handles gross unjust cases or event he teachers at school who have to tackle he silent bullying in a very subtle way. Above all, all those who return from war, tying to make sense of the entire event, what had be done and the impact. The after effect is more mind numbing than the event itself. Each and similar situation to the lines above, reflects a little of the post traumatic stress that one goes through. Whether it be profession related, the inner mental trauma or the ongoing social, verbal or physical violence that one has to endure, witness or handle; the negative side of humanity has a crippling effect long after the actual event has happened.

“I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.” Nelson Mandela

Coming out of the aftermath is the most difficult part. Facing the stress long after the situation has been done and over, is the most traumatic part. Each one of us have our sets of traumatic moments. The fear of being alone after being mugged or violated, the battle within to come out of the vice of smoking, the handling of daily life after the war or facing school for a bully-victim, all these need one to find their own reserve of courage and strength to brave the situation and face the day. It takes immense will to come out of the quagmire of negative emotions from the past that may bombard one and collapse the day.

“You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, ‘I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.'” Eleanor Roosevelt

Walking through those painful feelings and recollections isn’t done in a huge leap, but in baby steps. Yet once started to cope, one discovers that each one has it within themselves to face the fear and learn to brave the storm. Whether the steps made be big or small ones, those hardly matters more than the fact that one has resolved to move on and address their fears, than dwell in them. We are all survivors in our own way. Finding the light and purpose in life, is what matters the most. Once we draw out the strength and courage hidden deep within, one discovers that life is more beautiful now than before.

“I’m not afraid of storms, for I’m learning how to sail my ship.” Louisa May Alcott

Strength and Courage

It takes strength to be certain,
It takes courage to have doubts.

It takes strength to fit in,
It takes courage to stand out.

It takes strength to share a friend’s pain,
It takes courage to feel your own pain.

It takes strength to hide your own pain,
It takes courage to show it and deal with it.

It takes strength to stand guard,
It takes courage to let down your guard.

It takes strength to conquer,
It takes courage to surrender.

It takes strength to endure abuse,
It takes courage to stop it.

It takes strength to stand alone,
It takes courage to lean on a friend.

It takes strength to love,
It takes courage to beloved.

It takes strength to survive,
It takes courage to live.

Written by David L. Griffith

Posted in Christian, Daily, Life, poetry, Reflections

As They Grow, I Pray…

“See that you do not despise one of these little ones. For I tell you that their angels in heaven always see the face of my Father in heaven.” Matthew 18:10

Starting the new session of post Sunday church teaching for the primary children, a sense of joy and happiness surface on seeing those little faces listen avidly to the teachings and stories of the Bible. In one class alone, there would be many interesting behaviours to be seen. Some would listen keenly, others would giggle a bit and ask questions and the select few who were the mischief makers in class. All in all, teaching a class of primary schoolers brings forth a sense of fun, contentment and opens the insight to their guileless and innocuous behaviour.

“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.” Matthew 22:37-39

What happens over the years as they mature to adolescence ? Observing and listening to my adolescent niece, one often wonders how the values and innocence of childhood have been influenced by the modernism of the world around as well as the complicated adult lives. The snide remarks, eve teasing and bullying may have been picked up from the adults the initiators interact, observe or live with. As a consequence, the vicious chain of “wrong behaviour” gets extended on to the younger generations. What one never imagines, is the far reaching impact of this into the future. Over time, will inter-relations be more strained and living more surrounded by indirect communication and social media or the virtual world than building real meaningful relationships in the lives allotted to one.

“In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.” Matthew 5:16

During the conversation with adolescents of my family, is when one hopes that children never lose their innate guileless and loving nature. No matter how fast or where one grows, their childlike thinking, openness, straightforward words and happy nature shouldn’t be lost over the years. On seeing those happy faces, no matter how weary the adult mind becomes, the hope for a brighter future for the generations ahead is still cherished.

“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.” Romans 15:13

A Prayer For Our Children

Our children who live on earth,
Holy are each and every one of you.
May good dreams come,
Your way be found,
And heaven and earth rejoice with you.

May you be given
All you need for life
And may you accept our mistakes
As you allow yourself
To make mistakes and grow.

Lead us with imagination
And true integrity,
For yours are the minds, the hearts, and the souls
To heal the world
Now and forever.

Anonymous